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told female friend tonight how much i wanted to eat her out...

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM Author: Bristol Palin's ret...
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  10/15/14
...
seedy giraffe den
  10/15/14
Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by sur...
mustard locale double fault
  10/15/14
I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911&qu...
peach mood
  10/15/14
sooo good
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  10/15/14
dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form ...
Wonderful Cruise Ship
  10/15/14
Always great
sick pink dog poop casino
  10/15/14
...
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  10/17/14
!!!
sepia domesticated laser beams tank
  10/17/14
wtf
sapphire unholy lettuce
  10/17/14
This is embarrassing
Cerebral ceo
  10/17/14
fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily comp...
slate 180 karate
  10/17/14
I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique ...
aqua razzmatazz black woman
  10/17/14
yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good wor...
ivory scourge upon the earth university
  10/17/14
thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen ...
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  10/17/14
can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madelin...
cyan resort
  11/05/14
I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort...
Talking range son of senegal
  10/17/14
...
ivory scourge upon the earth university
  10/26/14
...
Brindle costumed church
  10/26/14
...
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  11/05/14
Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading...
Sticky lemon mexican
  11/05/14
Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the wh...
floppy bawdyhouse
  11/05/14
oh ho!
boyish irate office sex offender
  11/05/14
my favorite line
a lawyer who posts on the internet
  06/08/26
never caught this one until now. thnx.
sienna private investor
  11/05/14
...
confused white ape
  06/06/20
...
Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker
  02/11/22
...
Wine sweet tailpipe
  03/05/22
tyft
mind-boggling claret property wrinkle
  03/05/22
...
fuck her right in the pussy
  06/08/26
Important bump
Emotionally + Physically Abusive Ex-Husband
  06/08/26
...
fuck her right in the pussy
  06/08/26
Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 mon...
'"'"''"
  06/08/26


Poast new message in this thread



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Date: October 15th, 2014 6:43 AM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM

Author: Bristol Palin's retarded incest baby (You keep calling me Babu. It's Singh, mother fucker.)

though i certainly intended to flirt with her, i had not seriously considered telling her that i fantasized about eating her out ( which i do) it just came up.

see she was talking to me about this loserfuck ( she actually did call him a loser) she is obsessed with for reasons she herself does not understand. he is some low level officer in the navy while she is off to the peace corps in february. she is obsessed with him but according to her he doesn't give a crap about her, just using her as a convenient booty call. she told me the guy was so vapid and beneath her and low class and emotionally cold and yada yada but that she couldn't stop thinking about him and obsessing over him etc.

she asks me what she should do and i just tell her not to get too emotional or romantic about him, since the peace corps will end all chance for a relationship and probably change the very things she finds attractive in a man.

Now at this point in time i am thinking my friend's attachment to this douche is physical. she is VERY sexual, the relationship she describes sounds like a fuck buddy relationship gone complicated, and in my head i am imagining a buff navy jock.

so i add....." if the fucking is good just use him as a living dildo ..." but the fucking ISN'T good" she exclaims . what to do you mean i ask " he doesn't care about me , even in bed he is a very selfish lover"

Now i am a virgin, but i am pretty aware of what this phrase means. not only that, but i am aware my friend loves to get eaten out, how do i know this? because she has a guide to eating out pussy on her fucking myspace. its literally the first thing you see, and its been there for at least a year.

"so he doesn''t go down on you " i tell her. she looks slightly shocked." well i know you like to get eaten out since you have a guide for it on your myspace"

she starts laughing, but after a bit she looks at me and she sya " i do love it" she says , and blushes. " he never doesit " she complains. well why would he, if he knows he can just fuck you ?

" yeah he doesn't even have to ask we just get alone and im on him,but it sucks every time!"

now this entire conversation i have had my left arm over her shoulders, this conversation has taken place in the form of conspiratorial whispers in each others ears. at this point in time i lean in. " you know that time we went dancing at passion and you had that black skirt on" " yeah" only then did i notice you have great legs ( she laughs) ever since then i have wanted to eat you out,( oh ho! she says) you don't have to do anything ( Noo she says and starts slowlly but firmly pushing me away with both hands) " you don't have to do anything just lie there and enjoy and of course tell me what yu want ( she keeps pushing me slowly away) " i won't even take off my clothes, ill put a cell phone in your hand so you can call the cops if i dosomething you don't want" ( at this point she says my name and says no firmly.)

I look at her for twenty or so seconds and then say " allright" I scoot away so there is a good 30 inches of space separating us. the next couple of minutes are somewhat awkward. but Ten minutes later we are talking like NOTHING happened.

we then continued a series of raucus and interesting conversations, even returning to the navy guy, but also discussing the peace corps the imminent start for law school for me , the craziness of central african nations. we talked for another THREE AND A HALF hours after my very explicit comeon and there was no akwardness or sign of damage to our friendhsip.

we are hanging out again on saturday.

oh and the setting was a small bar/restaurant with these little nooks and such.

and for those who are going to tell me that i came on as desperate and that i am FRIENDZONEPWNED be aware i am already aware of this . i am resigned to my fate. she was never long term girlfriend material and icertainly have no romantic feelings towards her.

she is just a funny supercool latina CGWBT. if all i can be with her is friends ill gladly take the friendship.

why can't more girls be like this? THIS is how you turn down a pass, you don't have to go ahead and make the guy asahmed that he has a cock betweeen his legs. my friend was very firm, but she did not make me feel bad or guilty or anything. learn from this girls.

( http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=675218&forum_id=2#8544713 )

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26519775)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 7:00 AM
Author: seedy giraffe den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26519788)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:11 AM
Author: mustard locale double fault

Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by surprise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26519900)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:29 AM
Author: peach mood

I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911" meme, thanks for the reminder. I'll just circle back when I need a quick laugh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26519953)



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Date: October 15th, 2014 3:08 PM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker

sooo good

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26522226)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:09 PM
Author: Wonderful Cruise Ship

dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26522233)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:16 PM
Author: sick pink dog poop casino

Always great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26522297)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:30 PM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538501)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: sepia domesticated laser beams tank

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538515)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: sapphire unholy lettuce

wtf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538516)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:35 PM
Author: Cerebral ceo

This is embarrassing

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538531)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:37 PM
Author: slate 180 karate

fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily completely consumed by this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538541)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:42 PM
Author: aqua razzmatazz black woman

I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique post.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538567)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:45 PM
Author: ivory scourge upon the earth university

yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good work around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538588)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:48 PM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker

thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700246&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538619)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 9:23 AM
Author: cyan resort

can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madeline "numbah two" chen?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26653055)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:51 PM
Author: Talking range son of senegal

I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort lexicon.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26538650)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: ivory scourge upon the earth university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26587986)



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Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: Brindle costumed church



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26587988)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 5:45 AM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26652645)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:29 AM
Author: Sticky lemon mexican

Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading on xo. Getting a little teary eyed here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26653282)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:31 AM
Author: floppy bawdyhouse

Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the whole weekend?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26653296)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 11:18 AM
Author: boyish irate office sex offender

oh ho!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26653485)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 10:16 AM
Author: a lawyer who posts on the internet

my favorite line

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#49922129)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 11:25 AM
Author: sienna private investor

never caught this one until now. thnx.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#26653508)



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Date: June 6th, 2020 7:53 PM
Author: confused white ape



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#40365552)



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Date: February 11th, 2022 10:19 PM
Author: Fragrant orchid step-uncle's house weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#43954057)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: Wine sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#44089135)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:15 AM
Author: mind-boggling claret property wrinkle

tyft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#44089181)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:20 AM
Author: fuck her right in the pussy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#49921834)



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Date: June 8th, 2026 1:31 AM
Author: Emotionally + Physically Abusive Ex-Husband (oppose bitchbois)

Important bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#49921844)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:10 PM
Author: fuck her right in the pussy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#49922845)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:13 PM
Author: '"'"''"

Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2/#49922870)