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Seinfeld Takes On BUTTERTATS Girls
| ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 12/08/25 |
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Date: December 8th, 2025 3:02 PM Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., GEORGE: I’m telling you, Jerry, the woman looked like she fell asleep at a bus stop and the entire graffiti squad went to town on her.
JERRY: Oh yeah, the full mural package.
GEORGE: A sleeve, a back piece, something on the neck…I’m still not convinced one of them wasn’t a QR code.
JERRY: You scanned it?
GEORGE: I wanted to! I needed answers!
JERRY: So this is where “buttertats” comes in.
GEORGE: Exactly! She’s great… but her tattoos! She’s a buttertats!
JERRY: It’s becoming an epidemic. You think you’re going on a date with a normal person, and suddenly she’s got a dragon spiraling down her arm, a phoenix on her shoulder, and what looks like the schematics of a submarine behind her ear.
GEORGE: And they always say, “Every tattoo has a story.” Yeah, I know the story: you were twenty, drunk, and thought you were deep.
Elaine enters and sits down.
ELAINE: What are you two complaining about now?
GEORGE: Buttertats.
ELAINE: Oh please.
JERRY: Elaine, you don’t understand. We’re talking the extreme cases. The full ink-blot specials.
GEORGE: You ever talk to one of these women? It’s like dating a comic book. You keep getting distracted by all the panels.
JERRY: You’re trying to discuss dinner plans, and there’s a giant squid wrapped around her forearm glaring at you the whole time. I don’t need seafood judging me.
ELAINE: Oh come on, you guys are ridiculous.
GEORGE: Ridiculous? Elaine, she had a tattoo on her hand. A hand tattoo! That’s permanent! You can’t hide the hand! It’s the face of the arm!
JERRY: That’s right. Once you tattoo the hand, you’ve declared yourself a public art installation. |