PALM BEACH, FL — In a move that stunned importers of everything from flat-screen TVs to fiancées, former President Donald Trump reportedly shrugged off concerns from his base this week, stating, “I don’t care if my supporters can’t import Asian wives now,” while finalizing new 145% tariffs on Chinese goods.

“I’ve always said we need to protect American industries,” Trump said, presumably referring to industries such as mail-order romance, suburban resentment, and synthetic testosterone supplements. “If that means Chad from Tallahassee can’t meet his future third wife on Alibaba, that’s just the cost of greatness.”

According to insiders at Mar-a-Lago, the new tariffs have unintentionally disrupted several niche supply chains, including:

Anime body pillows,

Budget wedding packages in Cebu,

And suspiciously cheerful women named “Lily” with zero online history before 2022.

One supporter, 48-year-old Gary Sneed, expressed confusion and dismay. “I’ve waited six months for ‘CherryBlossom_Dream88’ to get her K-1 visa approved. Now Trump’s telling me I gotta date American women? What is this, socialism?”

In response to backlash, Trump’s team doubled down: “If American men can’t attract local women without going on discount dating sites based in Shenzhen, maybe they need more winning and less whining.”

When asked if the tariffs would apply to Russian brides, Trump replied, “No, that’s different. That’s national security.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5718600&forum_id=2:#48892639)