The absolute horror!

But that's not even the worst part. During those few terrifying seconds when I thought I was about to meet my maker, I had a glimpse of the afTTTTTTTTTTerlife... and it was utterly appalling!

No artisanal cheese shops, no private villas with infinity pools overlooking the Elysian Fields, not even a decent spa with a Himalayan salt room. And where was my high-rise condo, secure from the proles & homele$$ scum?

Just an endless void of nothingness! How DARE they expect someone of my discerning taste to spend eternity in such a drab and desolate place?

I demand a first-class reincarnation experience! All my toils in SeaTTTTTTTLe, "existing" as mid-level grocery manager...I deserve it all!

I want to be reborn into a life of luxury and privilege, with a trust fund, a personal chef, and a wardrobe filled with Gucci and Prada. Anything less would be an insult to my refined sensibilities.

If the powers that be cannot accommodate my demands, I shall simply refuse to die.

I will cling to this mortal coil with all my might until they can guarantee me a reincarnation experience worthy of my exquisite taste.

This is non-negotiable. How dare they.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5620544&forum_id=2[/quote#48255663)