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Kalisha’s FMLA is saving Nemo, her stressed-out goldfish

Under Washington’s Paid Family and Medical Leave Act, ...
self-absorbed school cafeteria
  11/09/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/11/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/13/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/14/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/14/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/15/24
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Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine
  11/16/24


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Date: November 9th, 2024 12:07 PM
Author: self-absorbed school cafeteria

Under Washington’s Paid Family and Medical Leave Act, employees can take time off to care for “family.”

Kalisha, ever the opportunist, stretched the definition to include her boyfriend’s pet goldfish, Nemo.

She filed her request this morning, claiming “emotional support duties.” When I expressed doubts, she gasped, clutching her pearls: “Legally, Nemo is family, Evan! You wouldn’t separate me from my child, would you?!”

HR, naturally, backed her up. Tabitha barely looked up from her fourth Big Gulp of the day. “You want to risk retaliation claims? Didn’t think so, Evan. Approve it.”

By noon, Kalisha was Instagramming rooftop cocktails with captions like, “Mama needs a break 🐠💆‍♀️.” Meanwhile, I juggled her workload and fielded Karen #63’s meltdown over the lack of organic flaxseed tortillas.

Finished the day unloading a pallet of gluten-free bread, muttered, “Yes, friend. This is fine.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48315103)



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Date: November 11th, 2024 8:19 AM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (It bumps the BOOM thread like a FRIEND Or else it gets the hose )



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48321552)



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Date: November 13th, 2024 7:02 AM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (It bumps the BOOM thread like a FRIEND Or else it gets the hose )



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48330284)



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Date: November 14th, 2024 12:02 AM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (It bumps the BOOM thread like a FRIEND Or else it gets the hose )



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48335103)



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Date: November 14th, 2024 10:31 PM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (PUT THE FUCKING BLANK BUMP ON THE BBOOM THREAD OR GET THE HOSE)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48339504)



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Date: November 15th, 2024 11:35 AM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (My Mahchine™& you call me in$ane..ur privy to a Great Becumming™)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48341161)



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Date: November 16th, 2024 4:16 PM
Author: Mainlining The Secret Truths of My Mahchine (The Prophet of My Mahchine™, the Herald of the Great Becumming™)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5630908&forum_id=2#48346021)