i wrote the lonely hunter thread, and here's why
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spot | 01/17/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/17/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/17/11 | | trip juggernaut spot | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/17/11 | | Aggressive twisted idea he suggested center | 01/17/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/17/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/17/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/17/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/17/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/17/11 | | swollen cuck | 01/17/11 | | Passionate yarmulke | 01/17/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/17/11 | | Glittery ruddy principal's office | 01/17/11 | | soggy deer antler | 01/17/11 | | swollen cuck | 01/18/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/18/11 | | French institution | 01/17/11 | | racy umber pozpig | 01/17/11 | | rebellious selfie pit | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/17/11 | | pale base hunting ground | 01/17/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/17/11 | | pale base hunting ground | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/18/11 | | pale base hunting ground | 01/18/11 | | Cheese-eating ratface | 01/17/11 | | Irradiated free-loading mediation | 01/17/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/17/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | Cheese-eating ratface | 01/18/11 | | Arrogant library | 01/18/11 | | Stirring Locus | 01/17/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/17/11 | | Stirring Locus | 01/17/11 | | carmine location | 01/18/11 | | French institution | 01/17/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/17/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/17/11 | | Stirring Locus | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/17/11 | | carmine location | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | Electric keepsake machete market | 01/17/11 | | violent territorial nowag | 02/16/11 | | carmine location | 01/17/11 | | pale base hunting ground | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/17/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/17/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/17/11 | | Exhilarant Doobsian School | 01/18/11 | | opaque mind-boggling point headpube | 01/18/11 | | Galvanic Becky | 01/17/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/17/11 | | soggy deer antler | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/17/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/18/11 | | Naked Therapy | 01/18/11 | | bossy emerald stain | 01/17/11 | | Orchid incel plaza | 01/17/11 | | carmine location | 01/17/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/17/11 | | bossy emerald stain | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | White hall place of business | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/17/11 | | bossy emerald stain | 01/18/11 | | carmine location | 01/18/11 | | diverse sandwich | 01/18/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | diverse sandwich | 01/18/11 | | racy umber pozpig | 01/18/11 | | Irradiated free-loading mediation | 01/18/11 | | multi-colored violent lodge | 01/18/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | bossy emerald stain | 01/18/11 | | boyish french chef | 01/18/11 | | obsidian hideous area generalized bond | 01/18/11 | | rebellious selfie pit | 01/18/11 | | swollen cuck | 01/17/11 | | French institution | 01/18/11 | | swollen cuck | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | silver toilet seat | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | aphrodisiac henna national security agency | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | boyish french chef | 01/18/11 | | elite elastic band ticket booth | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | razzle state goal in life | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/18/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 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01/18/11 | | Bronze Laser Beams Chapel | 02/25/11 | | 180 theatre | 05/24/11 | | Bronze Laser Beams Chapel | 11/10/11 | | Sooty den water buffalo | 11/10/11 | | Irradiated free-loading mediation | 01/18/11 | | Demanding resort | 01/18/11 | | twinkling indirect expression address | 01/18/11 | | puce insanely creepy tanning salon personal credit line | 01/18/11 | | jet box office police squad | 01/18/11 | | jet box office police squad | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | opaque mind-boggling point headpube | 01/18/11 | | Costumed aqua office | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | Primrose charismatic codepig | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | floppy impertinent ladyboy | 01/18/11 | | twinkling indirect expression address | 01/18/11 | | Dashing boltzmann | 01/18/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/18/11 | | jet box office police squad | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/18/11 | | jet box office police squad | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/18/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/18/11 | | boyish french chef | 01/18/11 | | beady-eyed national | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | cobalt idiotic kitchen associate | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | 180 theatre | 01/18/11 | | Coiffed tripping mexican house | 01/18/11 | | aphrodisiac henna national security agency | 01/18/11 | | shimmering stag film international law enforcement agency | 01/18/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 01/18/11 | | White hall place of business | 01/18/11 | | Buck-toothed menage | 01/18/11 | | White hall place of business | 01/18/11 | | Buck-toothed menage | 01/18/11 | | Chrome judgmental factory reset button | 01/18/11 | | White hall place of business | 01/18/11 | | boyish french chef | 01/18/11 | | hyperactive bright shitlib | 01/18/11 | | Magenta Arousing Forum Milk | 01/18/11 | | cobalt idiotic kitchen associate | 01/18/11 | | big wine roommate karate | 01/18/11 | | charcoal nursing home really tough guy | 01/18/11 | | marvelous multi-billionaire senate | 01/18/11 | | Maize splenetic property mental disorder | 01/18/11 | | Carnelian Brunch | 01/18/11 | | histrionic ivory sex offender ape | 01/18/11 | | Snowy stimulating coldplay fan | 01/18/11 | | hyperactive bright shitlib | 01/18/11 | | aphrodisiac henna national security agency | 01/18/11 | | Magenta Arousing Forum Milk | 01/18/11 | | Vivacious antidepressant drug | 01/18/11 | | Spectacular zombie-like lay feces | 01/20/11 | | concupiscible anal hell main people | 01/20/11 | | White hall place of business | 02/25/11 | | crimson scourge upon the earth theater | 01/20/11 | | Fear-inspiring sapphire crotch dragon | 02/16/11 | | French institution | 02/16/11 | | Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse | 02/25/11 | | rebellious selfie pit | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | White hall place of business | 02/25/11 | | Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | brilliant fighting school cafeteria background story | 02/25/11 | | rebellious selfie pit | 02/25/11 | | brilliant fighting school cafeteria background story | 02/25/11 | | beady-eyed national | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | White hall place of business | 02/25/11 | | Lascivious athletic conference volcanic crater | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | Lascivious athletic conference volcanic crater | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | soggy deer antler | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | High-end locale legend | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | Irate Curious Cruise Ship | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | Irate Curious Cruise Ship | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | beady-eyed national | 02/25/11 | | French institution | 02/25/11 | | razzle-dazzle slimy church building | 02/25/11 | | Beta Titillating Preventive Strike | 02/25/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 02/25/11 | | French institution | 02/25/11 | | Ruby cruel-hearted stead ceo | 02/25/11 | | Lascivious athletic conference volcanic crater | 02/25/11 | | hyperactive bright shitlib | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | French institution | 02/25/11 | | Adventurous Self-absorbed Tank | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | French institution | 02/25/11 | | aromatic dun regret range | 02/25/11 | | hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles | 11/07/11 | | Irradiated free-loading mediation | 02/25/11 | | mischievous site queen of the night | 02/25/11 | | cobalt idiotic kitchen associate | 02/25/11 | | Poppy newt sound barrier | 02/25/11 | | soggy deer antler | 02/25/11 | | infuriating smoky parlor | 02/25/11 | | Lascivious athletic conference volcanic crater | 02/25/11 | | lilac home | 02/25/11 | | razzmatazz mad cow disease meetinghouse | 09/09/11 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:15 PM Author: hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles Subject: (plus some miscellaneous attention-whoring)
this thread is not primarily intended to be a vessel for drama, nor is it a plea for attention; it's merely an attempt to get the truth out there. i knew that i was probably going to post this when i posted the trueblood thread, so don't think that this is some attempt to save face.
a few things i feel should be out there, both about lh and about my personal connection to the whole fiasco:
1: the thread was stupid and disrespectful and i shouldn't have posted it.
1.1: i've wanted to post that thread for months.
1.11: i often have very strong urges that i have trouble controlling. it's pretty shitty, because it upsets me to ignore them and it upsets me to carry them out, especially because they are usually things that are hurtful toward others.
1.12: i don't mean to sound like i'm dodging responsibility by blaming my shitty behavior on some hazy notion of mental illness, but (especially given my childhood diagnosis of ocd) the thought has crossed my mind that stronger or different medication might control these urges. you'll see more about these urges later.
1.2: the thread was deliberately incendiary, and i knew that the response would be what it was. it was not a "self pwn". my style in situations like that is to post something that i know will get a certain reaction, but in a way that implies that i don't anticipate it.
1.3: "trueblood" was the only moniker that i used to post in that thread or to post anything today besides this post. the few people that agreed were other people.
2: i generally meant what i said in the thread, despite the sensationalist nature of my wording.
2.1: i think that she made some shitty decisions and that she got off easy. sure, i don't know how much pain she went through in her broken marriage or anything like that, but based on her entitled attitude now, as well as her defensiveness in the thread in which she admitted her unfaithfulness, i do not think that she learned her lesson.
2.2: the intention was not to jeopardize her career (who would get fired for being a slut?) but to embarrass her by putting that information out there in a professional setting. imo she deserves far worse consequences than that.
2.21: i don't know what it is to "deserve" something; that sort of thing isn't within the realm of philosophy that really interests me. i don't think that there's any strict, defensible notion of desert; i'm just speaking my feelings. when i first became angry about her behavior and got the urge to post the thread, the figurative voices telling me to do it were saying, "she deserves it. she deserves to suffer." so... ask them wtf that means.
2.22: however, i would feel guilty taking her punishment into my own hands. i don't know what that says about my subliminal feelings about the matter.
2.3: fml is exactly right about my irrational anger toward lh: "I think box suffered a lot over the last few months, and felt a lot of guilt and self-hatred because of her actions. Seeing LH commit a worse sin of the same sort, and then glibly excuse herself (or at least that's how box sees it), was enraging."
2.31: when she first posted about cheating in two relationships, before i even knew that one of them was in a marriage, i was appalled that someone who committed such a sin was able to go on with her life, complaining constantly about her loneliness and inability to find a man. if you do something like that, imo, you relinquish any right to complain about your love life in the future.
2.32: i was further infuriated by her defense of her actions. no, i don't know the exact situation, but i'm with tmf on this: nothing makes such an action excusable.
3: someone in the thread said that i was mad because i had done the same thing. this is false. i treated twist badly in our relationship, but i didn't cheat.
3.1: we were explicitly not in a relationship and we were explicitly not exclusive. he was going to fuck a different girl just days before. however, were were hopelessly and childishly infatuated with one another. when i told him that i was going to see ohnoes, he was visibly upset, but said that my actions were up to me. i said, "ask me to promise and i will, so you feel less uneasy about it." he refused at first, then later asked me to promise that nothing would happen. i broke a promise to someone i loved and i hurt him - but i DID NOT CHEAT.
3.2: it was only after the event that my behavior became inexcusable, but perhaps it was understandable, given his reaction to the event.
3.21: when i told him what had happened (right after it did), he was incredibly hurt. he immediately practiced self-injury that he later classified as a suicide attempt, and he continued to abuse his body for weeks. he constantly spoke of suicide, and he made a huge lifestyle change that i will not reveal for fear of outing him. he cried daily for a month or two and sent me long e-mails about what a horrible thing i had done and what i needed to change in order to "become a real person". what he went through must have been horrible and i don't pretend that i had it any worse than he did, but i can only speak for myself, and there were four months of torture on my end. it was constant "i'm so sorry, i love you, we can make this work" alternated with, at first, "i want to cut myself open in a dumpster" and later "you are a sociopath and i hate you". the ups and downs further attached me to him - he'd build me up and tear me down - and i don't think i'll ever be completely free of what he did to me.
3.211: because he has posted similarly about MY behavior throughout the destroyed relationship (threats, etc.) i feel that it is my right to share this information.
3.22: in response to his depression, which was a reaction to MY initial mistake (so, yes, this is all my fault - i'm just trying to show you that it was a chain reaction) i too fell into a deep depression. this is where my inexcusable behavior came into play. i also started injuring myself, threatening to hurt or kill myself, and threatening to out him. my harmful urges became obsessive. every time we were almost okay, i would act out and ruin things again. eventually, he stopped loving me. soon after, he started hating me. now, he posts hurtful things about me on here (e.g. "she's a shitty, horrible person"), despite my pleas for him to stop. it may be helping him cope, but i doubt it: i think he just doesn't care enough to tone it down. since he started posting again, i've cried every day in response to the comments he's made about me here. i hadn't cried since december 12th, when i started feeling the effects of my antidepressants.
i hope you understand some of the circumstances that have led to the pain i'm in right now and consequently my aggressive meanness toward someone whose apparent comparative lack of suffering i envy. again, the behavior being understandable does not make it excusable: i know that i've done a lot of things that are plain wrong.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079276) |
 |
Date: January 18th, 2011 9:30 PM Author: geriatric bateful hissy fit corner
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:15 PM
Author: The Box
Subject: (plus some miscellaneous attention-whoring)
this thread is not primarily intended to be a vessel for drama, nor is it a plea for attention; it's merely an attempt to get the truth out there. i knew that i was probably going to post this when i posted the trueblood thread, so don't think that this is some attempt to save face.
a few things i feel should be out there, both about lh and about my personal connection to the whole fiasco:
1: the thread was stupid and disrespectful and i shouldn't have posted it.
1.1: i've wanted to post that thread for months.
1.11: i often have very strong urges that i have trouble controlling. it's pretty shitty, because it upsets me to ignore them and it upsets me to carry them out, especially because they are usually things that are hurtful toward others.
1.12: i don't mean to sound like i'm dodging responsibility by blaming my shitty behavior on some hazy notion of mental illness, but (especially given my childhood diagnosis of ocd) the thought has crossed my mind that stronger or different medication might control these urges. you'll see more about these urges later.
1.2: the thread was deliberately incendiary, and i knew that the response would be what it was. it was not a "self pwn". my style in situations like that is to post something that i know will get a certain reaction, but in a way that implies that i don't anticipate it.
1.3: "trueblood" was the only moniker that i used to post in that thread or to post anything today besides this post. the few people that agreed were other people.
2: i generally meant what i said in the thread, despite the sensationalist nature of my wording.
2.1: i think that she made some shitty decisions and that she got off easy. sure, i don't know how much pain she went through in her broken marriage or anything like that, but based on her entitled attitude now, as well as her defensiveness in the thread in which she admitted her unfaithfulness, i do not think that she learned her lesson.
2.2: the intention was not to jeopardize her career (who would get fired for being a slut?) but to embarrass her by putting that information out there in a professional setting. imo she deserves far worse consequences than that.
2.21: i don't know what it is to "deserve" something; that sort of thing isn't within the realm of philosophy that really interests me. i don't think that there's any strict, defensible notion of desert; i'm just speaking my feelings. when i first became angry about her behavior and got the urge to post the thread, the figurative voices telling me to do it were saying, "she deserves it. she deserves to suffer." so... ask them wtf that means.
2.22: however, i would feel guilty taking her punishment into my own hands. i don't know what that says about my subliminal feelings about the matter.
2.3: fml is exactly right about my irrational anger toward lh: "I think box suffered a lot over the last few months, and felt a lot of guilt and self-hatred because of her actions. Seeing LH commit a worse sin of the same sort, and then glibly excuse herself (or at least that's how box sees it), was enraging."
2.31: when she first posted about cheating in two relationships, before i even knew that one of them was in a marriage, i was appalled that someone who committed such a sin was able to go on with her life, complaining constantly about her loneliness and inability to find a man. if you do something like that, imo, you relinquish any right to complain about your love life in the future.
2.32: i was further infuriated by her defense of her actions. no, i don't know the exact situation, but i'm with tmf on this: nothing makes such an action excusable.
3: someone in the thread said that i was mad because i had done the same thing. this is false. i treated twist badly in our relationship, but i didn't cheat.
3.1: we were explicitly not in a relationship and we were explicitly not exclusive. he was going to fuck a different girl just days before. however, were were hopelessly and childishly infatuated with one another. when i told him that i was going to see ohnoes, he was visibly upset, but said that my actions were up to me. i said, "ask me to promise and i will, so you feel less uneasy about it." he refused at first, then later asked me to promise that nothing would happen. i broke a promise to someone i loved and i hurt him - but i DID NOT CHEAT.
3.2: it was only after the event that my behavior became inexcusable, but perhaps it was understandable, given his reaction to the event.
3.21: when i told him what had happened (right after it did), he was incredibly hurt. he immediately practiced self-injury that he later classified as a suicide attempt, and he continued to abuse his body for weeks. he constantly spoke of suicide, and he made a huge lifestyle change that i will not reveal for fear of outing him. he cried daily for a month or two and sent me long e-mails about what a horrible thing i had done and what i needed to change in order to "become a real person". what he went through must have been horrible and i don't pretend that i had it any worse than he did, but i can only speak for myself, and there were four months of torture on my end. it was constant "i'm so sorry, i love you, we can make this work" alternated with, at first, "i want to cut myself open in a dumpster" and later "you are a sociopath and i hate you". the ups and downs further attached me to him - he'd build me up and tear me down - and i don't think i'll ever be completely free of what he did to me.
3.211: because he has posted similarly about MY behavior throughout the destroyed relationship (threats, etc.) i feel that it is my right to share this information.
3.22: in response to his depression, which was a reaction to MY initial mistake (so, yes, this is all my fault - i'm just trying to show you that it was a chain reaction) i too fell into a deep depression. this is where my inexcusable behavior came into play. i also started injuring myself, threatening to hurt or kill myself, and threatening to out him. my harmful urges became obsessive. every time we were almost okay, i would act out and ruin things again. eventually, he stopped loving me. soon after, he started hating me. now, he posts hurtful things about me on here (e.g. "she's a shitty, horrible person"), despite my pleas for him to stop. it may be helping him cope, but i doubt it: i think he just doesn't care enough to tone it down. since he started posting again, i've cried every day in response to the comments he's made about me here. i hadn't cried since december 12th, when i started feeling the effects of my antidepressants.
i hope you understand some of the circumstances that have led to the pain i'm in right now and consequently my aggressive meanness toward someone whose apparent comparative lack of suffering i envy. again, the behavior being understandable does not make it excusable: i know that i've done a lot of things that are plain wrong.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079276)
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17086949) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:19 PM Author: Electric keepsake machete market
I would like to perpetuate the norm that posters professional lives should be off-limits to XO retaliation. Obviously I have a lot of self-interest in putting that norm out there, and you have no self-interest in sustaining it (since you're already outed, what do you care).
But I think that most people here would agree with me, and thus found that thread extremely alarming.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079340) |
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Date: January 17th, 2011 11:27 PM Author: hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles
it's funny because the e-mail explicitly said "this is not a threat. i would never do this, as i do not wish you harm. i just want you to know what someone could do, as i'm not yet sure that you understand the weight of your mistakes."
someone lacks reading comprehension skills - not shocking.
are you fucking her again? is that why you're being a big bad white knight? hahaha you old, pathetic faggot. pick on people fewer than ten years younger than you.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079451) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:28 PM Author: Unholy abode
way-t-fucking-l;dr
and this schtick is played out
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079454) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:28 PM Author: multi-colored violent lodge
thanks in advance for driving all board traffic to this thread for the rest of the night. not like anyone else had shit they wanted to discuss.
Man I hate you self-absorbed posters...even moreso you self absorbed posters who manage to dominate the board with your mindless drivel.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079462) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:31 PM Author: Electric keepsake machete market
Anyway, this thread convinces me that you are beyond a doubt completely insane.
Before, you only were crazy about your exes or boys you liked. That's still kind of crazy, but it's somewhat understandable for a teenage girl to act crazy about those things. But now that you randomly attacked LH like this, it's more than just teen girl drama.
Unless you've also hooked up with LH. She is hot, after all.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079503) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:32 PM Author: Irate Curious Cruise Ship
dear box,
i truly think that you are a horrible person. i used to look at you like i did several of my cousins, your age, going to start their undergrad, and i, like many of us on this board worried about you. that being said, having seen what you've done, and worse seeing what you write now, i cannot maintain any respect for you. you are a wicked person.
you've created a story about you and twist and maybe it's fair and maybe it's not, but you constantly insist that it be true. no one person's story of the events will ever be true--it's all perception and agreements and a thousand complicated emotions and you of all people should understand it. maybe cause you take meds you think that there's a true world somewhere out there and you need others to acknowledge that world and refuse to understand that people, sane people, remember things differently. you were in a relationship that was emotional and unstable. there is no longer time for you to seek validation; you need to accept that its over, that you won't be the hero, and move on.
you felt that lh needed punishment? apart from how naive you are, that was highly inappropriate. who are you to judge her actions? and even if you must, most respectable people limit their judgment to this board, and don't try to rely on unstable lurkers to go out and ruin someone's life. what does it matter if she gets "justice"? you are acting like a dumb, spoiled child, and you prove that you're sub-3.0 gpa was earned.
you are growing more an more psychotic, less and less innocent, and quite frankly, and quite frankly, for what it's worth, this anonymous person on the internet has no more respect for you. you need to grow up girl. seek help--not just people who will confirm your warped worldview. you've let yourself focus so much on what you think is justice that you have made yourself miserable, and it's not even pitiable, just maddening.
goodbye box. please consider retiring.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079522) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:46 PM Author: pale base hunting ground
Reminder: a 20 year old girl wrote the above OP and holds those opinions.
It doesn't take xoxohth.com very long to truly rape the psyche of a person. Tomorrow, maybe we should all take a day off.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079754) |
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:48 PM Author: Stirring Locus
Box, I'm way older than you but you're already doing one of the worst possible things for any individual, male or female. You are so quick to cast judgment upon others for their shitty behavior and claim it indefensible. HOWEVUH, you have a justification and/or rationalization for all of your own personal shitty behavior.
People in glass houses, etc etc etc. Plus, judging people all the time must be exhausting. You're young. Please take steps to stop this awful awful behavior. When I'm single nothing makes girls more dumpable than this kind of shit.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079783) |
Date: January 18th, 2011 12:02 AM Author: mischievous site queen of the night
FYI, Box, you say you agree with me but this was some crazy shit move you pulled and I don't remotely condone it. It is up to her exes to take revenge for being cheated on if they chooses to do so, not you or other psychos from the board.
You want to think she is a shitty person for what she did? Fine, that's perfectly reasonable. But you crossed a major line by emailing her IRL with veiled threats.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17079967) |
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Date: January 18th, 2011 12:27 AM Author: hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles
it was mean-spirited, but it was not a threat.
i am not rationalizing. i said in the OP that i shouldn't have done it.
it was not a threat.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17080353) |
Date: January 18th, 2011 12:19 AM Author: Translucent set
i'm sure you don't really care what i think but for everyone's sake please leave and never return. sending "non-threatening" emails as described in this thread is fucking crazy. you don't know what has transpired in peoples lives and while i'm sure some people on this board have done lots of fucked up shit it's not your job to be captain fucking planet and run around righting every wrong. get your life in order, do the right things, live irl, and quit acting like a 19 year old know it all.
i know you'll dismiss me as a not that smart, generally uninteresting, LH white knight, and all that may be true but you have a lot to learning to do. have a little humility. box, despite the fact that you're being crazy, a lot of people here (including myself), who are older, have their shit somewhat together etc. are telling you to stop. quit talking and just listen. i really hope things get better for you but I suspect your actions make this less likely everyday.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17080226)
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Date: January 18th, 2011 12:50 AM Author: Irradiated free-loading mediation
Box, it's clear your beef with LH is rooted in your jealousy of the relationship you believe she had with an xoxo poster. Same deal for bel.
The first step to recovery is understanding.
HTH
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17080625) |
Date: January 18th, 2011 2:43 AM Author: hairraiser transparent gas station fat ankles
just talked to my mom for a while. among other things, she said that the vigilante justice approach is a shitty one and it's a good thing i learned that lesson. she said that it's like i'm following some distorted version of the golden rule: that instead of treating others kindly because that's how i want to be treated, i'm treating others badly because i was treated badly. i told her that that's just how the world works; people hurt each other because they're hurt. she said that it doesn't have to be like that.
she doesn't think i'm a bad person, and that matters more than anything any of you thinks. she also thinks that the must important thing is that i stay the fuck away from this website, because all it does is hurt me. she's right, of course. hopefully this is the last you guys see of me.
i've apologized to lh via e-mail. i am sorry to anyone else that this upset or scared.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17081672) |
Date: January 18th, 2011 3:05 AM Author: shimmering stag film international law enforcement agency
Date: January 17th, 2011 11:15 PM
Author: The Box
Subject: (plus some miscellaneous attention-whoring)
this thread is not primarily intended to be a vessel for drama, nor is it a plea for attention; it's merely an attempt to get the truth out there. i knew that i was probably going to post this when i posted the trueblood thread, so don't think that this is some attempt to save face.
a few things i feel should be out there, both about lh and about my personal connection to the whole fiasco:
1: the thread was stupid and disrespectful and i shouldn't have posted it.
1.1: i've wanted to post that thread for months.
1.11: i often have very strong urges that i have trouble controlling. it's pretty shitty, because it upsets me to ignore them and it upsets me to carry them out, especially because they are usually things that are hurtful toward others.
1.12: i don't mean to sound like i'm dodging responsibility by blaming my shitty behavior on some hazy notion of mental illness, but (especially given my childhood diagnosis of ocd) the thought has crossed my mind that stronger or different medication might control these urges. you'll see more about these urges later.
1.2: the thread was deliberately incendiary, and i knew that the response would be what it was. it was not a "self pwn". my style in situations like that is to post something that i know will get a certain reaction, but in a way that implies that i don't anticipate it.
1.3: "trueblood" was the only moniker that i used to post in that thread or to post anything today besides this post. the few people that agreed were other people.
2: i generally meant what i said in the thread, despite the sensationalist nature of my wording.
2.1: i think that she made some shitty decisions and that she got off easy. sure, i don't know how much pain she went through in her broken marriage or anything like that, but based on her entitled attitude now, as well as her defensiveness in the thread in which she admitted her unfaithfulness, i do not think that she learned her lesson.
2.2: the intention was not to jeopardize her career (who would get fired for being a slut?) but to embarrass her by putting that information out there in a professional setting. imo she deserves far worse consequences than that.
2.21: i don't know what it is to "deserve" something; that sort of thing isn't within the realm of philosophy that really interests me. i don't think that there's any strict, defensible notion of desert; i'm just speaking my feelings. when i first became angry about her behavior and got the urge to post the thread, the figurative voices telling me to do it were saying, "she deserves it. she deserves to suffer." so... ask them wtf that means.
2.22: however, i would feel guilty taking her punishment into my own hands. i don't know what that says about my subliminal feelings about the matter.
2.3: fml is exactly right about my irrational anger toward lh: "I think box suffered a lot over the last few months, and felt a lot of guilt and self-hatred because of her actions. Seeing LH commit a worse sin of the same sort, and then glibly excuse herself (or at least that's how box sees it), was enraging."
2.31: when she first posted about cheating in two relationships, before i even knew that one of them was in a marriage, i was appalled that someone who committed such a sin was able to go on with her life, complaining constantly about her loneliness and inability to find a man. if you do something like that, imo, you relinquish any right to complain about your love life in the future.
2.32: i was further infuriated by her defense of her actions. no, i don't know the exact situation, but i'm with tmf on this: nothing makes such an action excusable.
3: someone in the thread said that i was mad because i had done the same thing. this is false. i treated twist badly in our relationship, but i didn't cheat.
3.1: we were explicitly not in a relationship and we were explicitly not exclusive. he was going to fuck a different girl just days before. however, were were hopelessly and childishly infatuated with one another. when i told him that i was going to see ohnoes, he was visibly upset, but said that my actions were up to me. i said, "ask me to promise and i will, so you feel less uneasy about it." he refused at first, then later asked me to promise that nothing would happen. i broke a promise to someone i loved and i hurt him - but i DID NOT CHEAT.
3.2: it was only after the event that my behavior became inexcusable, but perhaps it was understandable, given his reaction to the event.
3.21: when i told him what had happened (right after it did), he was incredibly hurt. he immediately practiced self-injury that he later classified as a suicide attempt, and he continued to abuse his body for weeks. he constantly spoke of suicide, and he made a huge lifestyle change that i will not reveal for fear of outing him. he cried daily for a month or two and sent me long e-mails about what a horrible thing i had done and what i needed to change in order to "become a real person". what he went through must have been horrible and i don't pretend that i had it any worse than he did, but i can only speak for myself, and there were four months of torture on my end. it was constant "i'm so sorry, i love you, we can make this work" alternated with, at first, "i want to cut myself open in a dumpster" and later "you are a sociopath and i hate you". the ups and downs further attached me to him - he'd build me up and tear me down - and i don't think i'll ever be completely free of what he did to me.
3.211: because he has posted similarly about MY behavior throughout the destroyed relationship (threats, etc.) i feel that it is my right to share this information.
3.22: in response to his depression, which was a reaction to MY initial mistake (so, yes, this is all my fault - i'm just trying to show you that it was a chain reaction) i too fell into a deep depression. this is where my inexcusable behavior came into play. i also started injuring myself, threatening to hurt or kill myself, and threatening to out him. my harmful urges became obsessive. every time we were almost okay, i would act out and ruin things again. eventually, he stopped loving me. soon after, he started hating me. now, he posts hurtful things about me on here (e.g. "she's a shitty, horrible person"), despite my pleas for him to stop. it may be helping him cope, but i doubt it: i think he just doesn't care enough to tone it down. since he started posting again, i've cried every day in response to the comments he's made about me here. i hadn't cried since december 12th, when i started feeling the effects of my antidepressants.
i hope you understand some of the circumstances that have led to the pain i'm in right now and consequently my aggressive meanness toward someone whose apparent comparative lack of suffering i envy. again, the behavior being understandable does not make it excusable: i know that i've done a lot of things that are plain wrong.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17081769)
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Date: January 18th, 2011 9:47 AM Author: cobalt idiotic kitchen associate
damn, apologies to the people i questioned in the other thread. y'all had it right on. i stand pwned.
and for all my soapboxing against fucking with people's lives, i don't think i'll have shit to say when someone decides the box hasn't suffered enough for the shit she's done.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17082212) |
Date: January 18th, 2011 10:54 AM Author: charcoal nursing home really tough guy
gee who called box being awful and crazy and unstable from the first day star-struck XO justin.tv trolls were welcoming "mel" as the new queen of xo?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17082471)
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Date: January 18th, 2011 12:13 PM Author: Snowy stimulating coldplay fan
The pretzel thing was a bullshit stunt to pull as I stated in that thread.
Box: your behavior is not ok even for this site. fix yourself.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17082868) |
Date: January 20th, 2011 3:02 PM Author: Spectacular zombie-like lay feces
And so The Box ascends to the XO Pantheon of Deranged Stalkers.
Sonic Youth and Mr. Jinx are personally on hand to welcome her into the elite fraternity of internet pyschos.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17100082) |
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Date: February 25th, 2011 12:43 PM Author: Vigorous misanthropic bawdyhouse
tbf...this just isn't fair.
I may be a crazy female sometimes, but she should really be committed.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17369189)
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Date: February 25th, 2011 11:56 AM Author: Lascivious athletic conference volcanic crater
tl;dr version of this???
who the fuck is LH?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1538697&forum_id=2#17368958) |
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