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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king
  12/29/15
b!
amethyst ticket booth clown
  12/29/15
C
Confused mental disorder chad
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
c
Dark Fiercely-loyal Police Squad Skinny Woman
  12/29/15
a
Canary cocky community account deer antler
  12/29/15
a
sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
amethyst ticket booth clown
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
amethyst ticket booth clown
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
exciting olive partner
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
?
exciting olive partner
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
c for sure
exciting olive partner
  12/29/15
C
sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor
  12/29/15
c
cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal
  12/29/15
Xo
Confused mental disorder chad
  12/29/15
chaturbate
laughsome avocado factory reset button keepsake machete
  12/30/15
C!
amethyst ticket booth clown
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
amethyst ticket booth clown
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Thriller Ratface
  12/29/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/29/15
...
Confused mental disorder chad
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
know-it-all abusive plaza gay wizard
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Shimmering Blood Rage Electric Furnace
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
exciting olive partner
  12/29/15
...
Ruddy pea-brained persian
  12/30/15
...
learning disabled bearded gunner
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
excitant deep church
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king
  12/30/15
2
Shimmering Blood Rage Electric Furnace
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
excitant deep church
  12/30/15
police
laughsome avocado factory reset button keepsake machete
  12/30/15
1
sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Confused mental disorder chad
  12/30/15
...
Confused mental disorder chad
  01/02/16
4 and 180
cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal
  12/30/15
...
Confused mental disorder chad
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Pink Trip Shitlib
  01/11/16
...
blathering geriatric faggot firefighter
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Exhilarant Twinkling Dingle Berry New Version
  11/05/20
...
Razzle mad-dog skullcap boiling water
  12/13/25
...
High-end depressive
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: amethyst ticket booth clown

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Dark Fiercely-loyal Police Squad Skinny Woman

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Canary cocky community account deer antler

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: amethyst ticket booth clown

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: amethyst ticket booth clown

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: exciting olive partner

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: exciting olive partner

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: exciting olive partner

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: laughsome avocado factory reset button keepsake machete

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: amethyst ticket booth clown

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: amethyst ticket booth clown

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Thriller Ratface

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: know-it-all abusive plaza gay wizard

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Shimmering Blood Rage Electric Furnace

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: exciting olive partner

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: Ruddy pea-brained persian



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: learning disabled bearded gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: excitant deep church

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Misunderstood Address Philosopher-king

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Shimmering Blood Rage Electric Furnace

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: excitant deep church

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: laughsome avocado factory reset button keepsake machete

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: sable razzmatazz toilet seat parlor

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: cream razzle-dazzle son of senegal

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Confused mental disorder chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Pink Trip Shitlib

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: blathering geriatric faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Exhilarant Twinkling Dingle Berry New Version

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: Razzle mad-dog skullcap boiling water



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: High-end depressive



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2#41284137)