Date: February 11th, 2026 10:13 AM
Author: this moniker is not available
I’m really sorry. Having to make this decision is brutal — especially when your kids love the dog so much. The fact that you’re thinking carefully about how to handle it tells me you’re being a thoughtful parent.
With kids 6, 8, and 10, they’re all old enough to understand death in a real way. This is actually an important developmental moment for how they learn to process loss.
Here’s how the options tend to play out emotionally:
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## Option 1 – Don’t tell them until after (in-clinic)
**Pros**
* Protects them from seeing it happen.
* Avoids anticipatory anxiety.
**Cons**
* Can damage trust if they feel excluded.
* Removes their chance to say goodbye.
* May create confusion or guilt (“Why didn’t I get to see him?”).
For kids these ages, I generally *don’t* recommend this unless there’s an urgent emergency. Saying goodbye matters.
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## Option 2 – Tell them beforehand, in-clinic euthanasia
**Pros**
* They get closure.
* They can say goodbye in a calm way.
* Less expensive than at-home.
* You can choose whether they’re in the room for the final moment.
**Cons**
* The clinic setting can feel sterile or scary.
This is often the most balanced choice. You can:
* Let them come to say goodbye.
* Give them the option to stay or step out.
* Have another adult take them home after if needed.
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## Option 3 – At-home euthanasia, kids present
**Pros**
* Peaceful, familiar environment.
* Less clinical.
* Can feel gentle and natural.
* Kids can be present if they want.
**Cons**
* More expensive.
* The home becomes associated with the memory (sometimes that’s okay, sometimes hard).
If finances allow, at-home is usually the most peaceful experience for everyone. But kids should have a *choice* about being present — not an obligation.
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## Option 4 – At-home, kids not present
This can work well if:
* They say goodbye beforehand.
* They don’t want to see it happen.
* You want the calm of home without them witnessing the final moment.
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# My Honest Recommendation
For their ages (6, 8, 10), I’d suggest:
**Tell them beforehand + give them a chance to say goodbye.**
Then either:
* In-clinic with the option to stay or step out, **or**
* At-home with the option to be present or not.
The key is **choice and preparation**, not shielding them completely.
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# How to Tell Them
Keep it simple and direct. Avoid euphemisms like “put to sleep” or “went away.”
You could say:
> “Buddy is very sick and his body isn’t working anymore. The vet can help him die peacefully so he doesn’t suffer. It will be very gentle. We’re going to say goodbye.”
Be ready for:
* Tears
* Anger
* Very practical questions (“Will it hurt?”)
* Random kid questions (“Can we get another dog?”)
All normal.
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# Should They Be in the Room?
At 6, 8, and 10:
* Let them decide.
* Prepare them for what they’ll see (sleeping, deep breaths, then stillness).
* Tell them they can leave anytime.
What’s more traumatic than witnessing a peaceful euthanasia is:
* Feeling lied to.
* Feeling excluded.
* Feeling like it happened “to” them without warning.
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# A Few Things That Help
* Let them draw a picture or write a note for the dog.
* Take a final family photo.
* Cut a small lock of fur if that feels right.
* Have a plan for afterward (ice cream, quiet movie night, etc.).
* Consider a small ritual or burial/ash ceremony.
Ritual helps kids process grief.
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# One More Important Thing
This will likely be their first real experience with death. Handled openly and gently, it teaches:
* Love includes letting go.
* Death is part of life.
* Grief is safe to feel.
That’s a powerful lesson — even though it hurts like hell.
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If you want, tell me:
* How sick the dog is right now
* Whether this is scheduled or urgent
* How sensitive each kid tends to be
I can help you think through the best specific plan for your family.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833583&forum_id=2...id#49662842)