Title: "The Burden of Ambition: Disco Fries and the Ascent of Teewinot"

Narrated in the deep, reflective voice of Werner Herzog.

There are those who walk among us burdened with great dreams, and even greater delusions. Today, I will speak of one such man—a man known by the peculiar name of Disco Fries. He is a figure of contradictions, like the mountain he seeks to conquer. He has declared his desire to ascend Teewinot Mountain, the jagged sentinel of the Teton Range, a place where only the resolute dare tread.

But Disco Fries is not a man crafted for such ambitions. He is, by his own admission, a man of considerable girth, whose body is molded more by the soft contours of fast food than the chiseled sinew of climbers. Yet, it is precisely this incongruity, this almost tragic absurdity, that compels him to attempt the impossible. However, he is not alone in this quixotic pursuit. Alongside him is his comrade, a kindred spirit known as Mainlining, who shares both his fascination with the mountain and a peculiar, almost obsessive, admiration for the dangers of the natural world.

Scene: The Base of Teewinot Mountain

The mountain stands indifferent, a remnant of primordial upheavals that shaped this land long before human ambitions took root. Its name, Teewinot, comes from the Shoshone word for "many pinnacles." It is as if the mountain itself mocks them, a taunt from nature to these two men whose preparations are more a collection of bravado and snacks than true readiness.

Mainlining stands beside Disco Fries, his face hardened by years of quiet contemplation and a somewhat romantic fascination with death. A man who has written, again and again, about grizzly bears and the brutal realities of the wild. His is a different kind of folly. Where Disco Fries carries his extra weight like a penance, Mainlining carries an invisible weight, the weight of knowing too much—of bears, of solitude, of the thin line between survival and demise.

Mainlining looks at Disco Fries with a kind of bemused skepticism, a grin curling at the edge of his lips. "Do you think you're ready for this, old friend?" he asks, his voice low and resonant, almost lost in the whispering winds of the early morning. Disco Fries grins back, his face flushed with the energy of naïve determination.

"Ready as I'll ever be," Disco Fries replies, trying to keep his tone light, hiding the fear he feels in his chest. They begin their ascent, a shared delusion propelling them upward.

They take their first steps onto the trail.

Each step is an existential struggle. The initial path is not steep, but it is enough to draw sweat from Disco Fries's brow and make his breath heavy. Mainlining moves with an unsettling calm, his eyes always darting toward the tree line, perhaps imagining the grizzlies that could appear at any moment. But even he is not immune to the toil of the climb, as his breath quickens with each step. He watches Disco Fries with both concern and a certain morbid curiosity, wondering how far his friend will make it before surrendering to the inevitability of his limitations.

The trail steepens.

Teewinot reveals its cruelty slowly. It is not a mountain that intimidates at first sight; instead, it wears you down, like a predator stalking its prey. Disco Fries’s breathing grows more labored. He is now drenched in sweat, the cool morning air doing little to soothe the fire burning in his lungs. Mainlining watches with a wary eye, a half-smirk crossing his lips. “You don’t have to do this, you know,” he murmurs, knowing full well that Disco Fries will refuse to turn back.

Disco Fries laughs, but the sound is hollow. "Come on, Mainlining. We've talked about this climb for years. I'm not backing down now." His friend nods, a glint of something dark in his eyes—a knowing look that suggests he has already foreseen the inevitable outcome.

The sun climbs higher.

They move together, a strange pair on this relentless path—one driven by sheer stubbornness, the other by a fascination with testing the limits of human endurance. Mainlining is not untouched by the strain; his breath grows heavier, though his steps remain sure. Disco Fries, however, is flagging. Each step is a Herculean effort, his legs trembling, sweat pouring from his brow. Mainlining pulls ahead, then stops, waiting for Disco Fries to catch up.

"Catch your breath," he advises, though the hint of mockery in his tone cannot be concealed. Disco Fries collapses onto a rock, panting like a dog left in the sun. "Just… give me… a minute," he gasps, feeling the weight of every granola bar and every greasy meal he’s ever consumed pressing down upon him.

Mainlining pulls out a flask of water, his face inscrutable, as if contemplating the futility of their endeavor. "This isn't a grizzly, Disco. You can’t just stare it down," he finally says, with a hint of a smile that suggests he might be enjoying this challenge more than he lets on.

The final approach is before them.

The summit looms overhead, a brutal, craggy promise. Mainlining's eyes narrow, and his breath steadies. He knows this is where things get dangerous. "The path gets thinner here," he warns. "One slip, and you'll wish you were back down at the trailhead, eating fries."

Disco Fries nods, determined, but his confidence is waning. "I've got this," he mutters, but even he does not seem convinced. The rocks beneath them grow loose and slippery, the wind begins to howl. Mainlining moves with surprising agility, his frame leaner, his movements almost predatory. Disco Fries lumbers behind, each step sending a shower of small rocks clattering down the side of the mountain.

Scene: Nearing the Pinnacle

They reach a ledge where the trail narrows, a spine of rock that stretches out like the back of some ancient beast. Mainlining stops and turns back. "Disco," he says softly, almost tenderly, "maybe this is far enough."

But Disco Fries shakes his head, his face red with effort, his eyes bloodshot. "No… we’re… so close… I can’t stop now," he wheezes. Mainlining nods, but his expression is one of resignation. He knows the mountain does not care for pride, or willpower, or friendship. He knows what comes next.

The winds pick up.

The final stretch is treacherous, the rock face crumbling beneath their feet. Mainlining moves quickly, his hands finding holds in the rock. Disco Fries follows, but his legs are shaking, his breath shallow. He slips, catching himself just in time. Mainlining looks back. "Stay close, Disco. This is no place to be reckless."

But then, the mountain speaks with its own voice—a sudden gust of wind that strikes like a whip. Disco Fries wobbles, teeters on the edge, his arms flailing for balance. Mainlining reaches out, his hand stretching toward his friend. "Disco!" he shouts.

But it is too late.

Disco Fries loses his footing, his body tipping over the edge. For a brief, terrifying moment, he is suspended in mid-air, his eyes wide with shock, and then he is falling. Time slows to a crawl. Mainlining watches in horror, helpless to intervene. Disco Fries's body strikes the rocks below with a sickening thud, and he tumbles down, down, until he comes to rest on a narrow ledge, his body battered, but still—somehow—alive.

Final Scene: The Aftermath

The rescuers find them hours later. Mainlining, shaken but unharmed, stands by, waiting as they lower ropes to reach Disco Fries, who lies groaning, clutching his side. The rescuers pull him up with ropes, his face pale, his breaths shallow. Mainlining looks at him with a mix of relief and exasperation. "You almost died, you know," he mutters, unable to hide a smile.

Disco Fries, despite everything, grins back. "But I didn’t. The mountain… it spoke to me," he says, wheezing, as if the experience has given him some newfound wisdom—or perhaps just new stories to tell.

In the distance, Teewinot remains unmoved, a silent witness to the hubris of men who think they can conquer it. Mainlining, his eyes fixed on the summit, sighs and shakes his head. "We’ll be back," he murmurs, almost to himself.

Disco Fries laughs—a broken, weary laugh that echoes through the valleys below. "Yeah," he says, as they begin their descent, back to the world of asphalt and convenience stores, where they will retell their tale of near-conquest, of how they almost conquered Teewinot.

But the mountain will remain indifferent, as always, knowing that it has seen many such men before and will see many more. For in this grand, indifferent universe, we are all Disco Fries and Mainlining, climbing our mountains, dreaming of summits that may never be reached.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5593218&forum_id=2...id#48078265)