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told female friend tonight how much i wanted to eat her out...

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM Author: Bristol Palin's ret...
carmine costumed crotch
  10/15/14
...
pontificating stirring background story national
  10/15/14
Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by sur...
stubborn gaping
  10/15/14
I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911&qu...
Salmon Naked Striped Hyena
  10/15/14
sooo good
carmine costumed crotch
  10/15/14
dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form ...
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  10/15/14
Always great
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  10/15/14
...
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  10/17/14
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  10/17/14
wtf
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  10/17/14
This is embarrassing
fighting lascivious lay
  10/17/14
fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily comp...
Bonkers cruise ship
  10/17/14
I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique ...
Mildly Autistic Contagious Halford State
  10/17/14
yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good wor...
Appetizing tantric office selfie
  10/17/14
thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen ...
carmine costumed crotch
  10/17/14
can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madelin...
Rusted impertinent orchestra pit
  11/05/14
I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort...
Amber Tripping Therapy Menage
  10/17/14
...
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  10/26/14
...
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  10/26/14
...
carmine costumed crotch
  11/05/14
Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading...
ultramarine corner
  11/05/14
Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the wh...
Low-t Trip Electric Furnace Spot
  11/05/14
oh ho!
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  11/05/14
my favorite line
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never caught this one until now. thnx.
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  11/05/14
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  06/06/20
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carmine costumed crotch
  02/11/22
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Concupiscible Hominid
  03/05/22
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  03/05/22
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carmine costumed crotch
  06/08/26
Important bump
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  06/08/26
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carmine costumed crotch
  06/08/26
Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 mon...
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  06/08/26
...
carmine costumed crotch
  06/10/26
I wonder what he's up to now
Salmon Naked Striped Hyena
  06/10/26
playing with his shoelaces and chewing on his tongue
Primrose area
  06/10/26
Bristol's kid just turned 16, looks like he's ready for ince...
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  06/10/26
I suspect that was gunnerattt tp
Laughsome Range
  06/10/26
...
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  06/10/26
...
pungent dead piazza
  06/10/26
I find something new in this magnum opus each time. Central ...
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  06/10/26
the craziness of central african nations had me lollercausti...
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  06/10/26


Poast new message in this thread



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Date: October 15th, 2014 6:43 AM
Author: carmine costumed crotch

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM

Author: Bristol Palin's retarded incest baby (You keep calling me Babu. It's Singh, mother fucker.)

though i certainly intended to flirt with her, i had not seriously considered telling her that i fantasized about eating her out ( which i do) it just came up.

see she was talking to me about this loserfuck ( she actually did call him a loser) she is obsessed with for reasons she herself does not understand. he is some low level officer in the navy while she is off to the peace corps in february. she is obsessed with him but according to her he doesn't give a crap about her, just using her as a convenient booty call. she told me the guy was so vapid and beneath her and low class and emotionally cold and yada yada but that she couldn't stop thinking about him and obsessing over him etc.

she asks me what she should do and i just tell her not to get too emotional or romantic about him, since the peace corps will end all chance for a relationship and probably change the very things she finds attractive in a man.

Now at this point in time i am thinking my friend's attachment to this douche is physical. she is VERY sexual, the relationship she describes sounds like a fuck buddy relationship gone complicated, and in my head i am imagining a buff navy jock.

so i add....." if the fucking is good just use him as a living dildo ..." but the fucking ISN'T good" she exclaims . what to do you mean i ask " he doesn't care about me , even in bed he is a very selfish lover"

Now i am a virgin, but i am pretty aware of what this phrase means. not only that, but i am aware my friend loves to get eaten out, how do i know this? because she has a guide to eating out pussy on her fucking myspace. its literally the first thing you see, and its been there for at least a year.

"so he doesn''t go down on you " i tell her. she looks slightly shocked." well i know you like to get eaten out since you have a guide for it on your myspace"

she starts laughing, but after a bit she looks at me and she sya " i do love it" she says , and blushes. " he never doesit " she complains. well why would he, if he knows he can just fuck you ?

" yeah he doesn't even have to ask we just get alone and im on him,but it sucks every time!"

now this entire conversation i have had my left arm over her shoulders, this conversation has taken place in the form of conspiratorial whispers in each others ears. at this point in time i lean in. " you know that time we went dancing at passion and you had that black skirt on" " yeah" only then did i notice you have great legs ( she laughs) ever since then i have wanted to eat you out,( oh ho! she says) you don't have to do anything ( Noo she says and starts slowlly but firmly pushing me away with both hands) " you don't have to do anything just lie there and enjoy and of course tell me what yu want ( she keeps pushing me slowly away) " i won't even take off my clothes, ill put a cell phone in your hand so you can call the cops if i dosomething you don't want" ( at this point she says my name and says no firmly.)

I look at her for twenty or so seconds and then say " allright" I scoot away so there is a good 30 inches of space separating us. the next couple of minutes are somewhat awkward. but Ten minutes later we are talking like NOTHING happened.

we then continued a series of raucus and interesting conversations, even returning to the navy guy, but also discussing the peace corps the imminent start for law school for me , the craziness of central african nations. we talked for another THREE AND A HALF hours after my very explicit comeon and there was no akwardness or sign of damage to our friendhsip.

we are hanging out again on saturday.

oh and the setting was a small bar/restaurant with these little nooks and such.

and for those who are going to tell me that i came on as desperate and that i am FRIENDZONEPWNED be aware i am already aware of this . i am resigned to my fate. she was never long term girlfriend material and icertainly have no romantic feelings towards her.

she is just a funny supercool latina CGWBT. if all i can be with her is friends ill gladly take the friendship.

why can't more girls be like this? THIS is how you turn down a pass, you don't have to go ahead and make the guy asahmed that he has a cock betweeen his legs. my friend was very firm, but she did not make me feel bad or guilty or anything. learn from this girls.

( http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=675218&forum_id=2#8544713 )

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26519775)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 7:00 AM
Author: pontificating stirring background story national



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26519788)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:11 AM
Author: stubborn gaping

Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by surprise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26519900)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:29 AM
Author: Salmon Naked Striped Hyena

I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911" meme, thanks for the reminder. I'll just circle back when I need a quick laugh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26519953)



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Date: October 15th, 2014 3:08 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch

sooo good

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26522226)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:09 PM
Author: brindle unholy cuckoldry ladyboy

dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26522233)



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Date: October 15th, 2014 3:16 PM
Author: topaz erotic home people who are hurt

Always great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26522297)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:30 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538501)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: arousing fat ankles elastic band

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538515)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: exciting garrison

wtf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538516)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:35 PM
Author: fighting lascivious lay

This is embarrassing

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538531)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:37 PM
Author: Bonkers cruise ship

fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily completely consumed by this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538541)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:42 PM
Author: Mildly Autistic Contagious Halford State

I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique post.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538567)



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Date: October 17th, 2014 9:45 PM
Author: Appetizing tantric office selfie

yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good work around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538588)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:48 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch

thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700246&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538619)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 9:23 AM
Author: Rusted impertinent orchestra pit

can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madeline "numbah two" chen?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26653055)



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Date: October 17th, 2014 9:51 PM
Author: Amber Tripping Therapy Menage

I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort lexicon.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26538650)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: Appetizing tantric office selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26587986)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: bat shit crazy turquoise milk bawdyhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26587988)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 5:45 AM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26652645)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 10:29 AM
Author: ultramarine corner

Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading on xo. Getting a little teary eyed here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26653282)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 10:31 AM
Author: Low-t Trip Electric Furnace Spot

Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the whole weekend?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26653296)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 11:18 AM
Author: federal pale resort

oh ho!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26653485)



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Date: June 8th, 2026 10:16 AM
Author: Galvanic lake parlor genital piercing

my favorite line

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49922129)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 11:25 AM
Author: floppy bisexual travel guidebook

never caught this one until now. thnx.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#26653508)



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Date: June 6th, 2020 7:53 PM
Author: internet-worthy gaming laptop community account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#40365552)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2022 10:19 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#43954057)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 5th, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: Concupiscible Hominid



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#44089135)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 5th, 2022 10:15 AM
Author: beady-eyed base

tyft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#44089181)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:20 AM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49921834)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:31 AM
Author: aquamarine idiotic step-uncle's house toaster

Important bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49921844)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:10 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49922845)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:13 PM
Author: transparent multi-colored twinkling uncleanness

Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49922870)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:35 PM
Author: carmine costumed crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927940)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:41 PM
Author: Salmon Naked Striped Hyena

I wonder what he's up to now

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927942)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 1:46 PM
Author: Primrose area

playing with his shoelaces and chewing on his tongue

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927950)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 1:53 PM
Author: Pearl massive boistinker

Bristol's kid just turned 16, looks like he's ready for incest with mama.

https://www.instagram.com/p/DEdwvcZOaqH/?img_index=1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927960)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:57 PM
Author: Laughsome Range

I suspect that was gunnerattt tp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927967)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 11:01 PM
Author: Grizzly stimulating gas station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49929626)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:44 PM
Author: pungent dead piazza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927947)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:47 PM
Author: Pearl massive boistinker

I find something new in this magnum opus each time. Central African nations. Amazing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49927953)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 3:03 PM
Author: Chocolate deep location black woman

the craziness of central african nations had me lollercausting hard

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2...id.#49928176)