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THE BETAMORPHOSIS.

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&foru...
jonnyBlaze
  01/30/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  02/11/12
...
.,.,..,,,.,..,.,.,,,,.,.,.,...,,.,.,,,.,....,
  02/11/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  02/14/12
dude, give TBF credit when it's due and link to the original...
\"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"
  02/14/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  03/02/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  03/08/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  07/18/12
A Chung Tale
OberTRUMPENfuerhur
  07/18/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  07/19/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  07/28/12
you love dem tbf posts huh
bill engvall
  07/28/12
lol, just lol.
Delusional fat chick shopping dresses at H&M
  07/28/12
WE NEEDC TO KILL ALL NIGGERS
,.,...,..,,.,:,;,;,.,.,:.,:,.,,.,.,.,.:,:.,:.::,.
  07/28/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  08/09/12
...
.,.,.,..,..,.,..:,,:,..,.;:,,..,:,.;.:..:.,:,::,.
  08/09/12
credited
\"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"
  08/09/12
...
longwangpoontang
  12/03/14
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  12/30/15
Legendary
longwangpoontang
  08/09/12
At least provide the link to the original
\"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"
  08/09/12
done
jonnyBlaze
  08/17/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  08/23/12
I was actually thinking about this yesterday
SpEd with a 3.9 GPA in a TTT major attending Boalt
  08/23/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  09/13/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  10/30/12
...
\"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"
  10/30/12
...
jonnyBlaze
  12/15/12
2013 bump
jonnyBlaze
  01/07/13
...
jonnyBlaze
  01/22/13
...
Air Bud
  06/13/13
...
Delusional fat chick shopping dresses at H&M
  06/13/13
TBF's glory
longwangpoontang
  10/11/13
...
jonnyBlaze
  12/18/14
...
sharklasers
  07/28/16
...
jonnyBlaze
  07/27/17
...
Johannes Brahms
  08/13/17
...
CapTTTainFalcon
  08/13/17
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  08/13/17
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  10/25/17
now i remember. yeah, it used to be that good here.
prince
  10/25/17
turns out calling asians bugs was a proud, long, rich tradit...
prince
  10/25/17
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  10/27/17
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  11/26/17
Claire was a scholar
;::;:;;\'\';:::\'.,:...:::;
  11/26/17
...
Kilns4Kikes
  01/23/18
...
longwangpoontang
  09/11/19
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  01/23/18
...
bowlcut autist
  01/23/18
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  06/16/18
...
longwangpoontang
  10/07/18
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  10/19/18
...
nyuug
  10/21/18
...
boiroast tp
  11/24/18
...
.,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..
  04/28/19


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: January 30th, 2012 4:50 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM

Author: To be fair (Semi-Retired)

To be fair,

PART I:

One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.

"What's happened to me," he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before - when Samsa was still a successful ibanker - hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.

"Oh God," he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it; he did not know what to make of them.

He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. "Good God!" he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?

As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. "Teddy Chu-yu Huang," a sing-song voice called out, "Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, "Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni." Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquisitely bound feet.

As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. "Te-ddy...Te-ddy!," he called out, "Ni shenti hao ma?" And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - "CHU-YU!" Gregor directed an answer as best he could: "I go baba, xiexie." He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but rather congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night.

***

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19865895)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2012 1:08 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19942908)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2012 1:33 PM
Author: .,.,..,,,.,..,.,.,,,,.,.,.,...,,.,.,,,.,....,




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19942985)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 14th, 2012 4:19 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19963598)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 14th, 2012 4:20 PM
Author: \"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"

dude, give TBF credit when it's due and link to the original

but a top 5 post of all time

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19963602)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2012 5:01 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#20107232)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 8th, 2012 1:03 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#20156701)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 18th, 2012 3:18 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21116212)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 18th, 2012 3:22 PM
Author: OberTRUMPENfuerhur

A Chung Tale

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21116242)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2012 2:27 AM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21121465)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:58 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201599)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:58 PM
Author: bill engvall (aquí está tu letrero)

you love dem tbf posts huh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201601)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:59 PM
Author: Delusional fat chick shopping dresses at H&M

lol, just lol.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201608)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 10:00 PM
Author: ,.,...,..,,.,:,;,;,.,.,:.,:,.,,.,.,.,.:,:.,:.::,.


WE NEEDC TO KILL ALL NIGGERS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201612)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:23 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296217)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:24 PM
Author: .,.,.,..,..,.,..:,,:,..,.;:,,..,:,.;.:..:.,:,::,.




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296225)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:25 PM
Author: \"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"

credited

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296229)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2014 8:06 PM
Author: longwangpoontang



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#26851409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:26 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (steaks)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#29481999)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:26 PM
Author: longwangpoontang

Legendary

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296241)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:26 PM
Author: \"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"

At least provide the link to the original

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296249)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 17th, 2012 2:30 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze

done

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21360821)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2012 1:50 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21403977)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2012 2:01 PM
Author: SpEd with a 3.9 GPA in a TTT major attending Boalt (nof@chicks.com)

I was actually thinking about this yesterday

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21404036)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 13th, 2012 5:12 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21571558)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 30th, 2012 3:21 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21924655)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 30th, 2012 4:02 PM
Author: \"\"\'\"\'\'\'\"\"



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21925080)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2012 4:03 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22256092)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 7th, 2013 2:31 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze

2013 bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22385066)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 22nd, 2013 5:27 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22483481)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 13th, 2013 2:43 PM
Author: Air Bud



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#23388085)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 13th, 2013 3:23 PM
Author: Delusional fat chick shopping dresses at H&M



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#23388309)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 11th, 2013 8:14 PM
Author: longwangpoontang

TBF's glory

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#24215654)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 18th, 2014 4:27 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#26957385)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2016 6:11 PM
Author: sharklasers



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#31053610)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 27th, 2017 2:19 PM
Author: jonnyBlaze



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33867558)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 3:28 AM
Author: Johannes Brahms



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976384)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 3:33 AM
Author: CapTTTainFalcon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976395)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 4:13 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (* .)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976464)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 2:59 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (@realcharliebrown)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523544)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 3:10 AM
Author: prince

now i remember. yeah, it used to be that good here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523558)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 3:11 AM
Author: prince

turns out calling asians bugs was a proud, long, rich tradition on xo going back a long ways. that gives me tickles.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523559)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2017 1:39 PM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (@realcharliebrown)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34542580)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 26th, 2017 12:14 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (@realcharliebrown)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34772753)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 26th, 2017 1:00 AM
Author: ;::;:;;\'\';:::\'.,:...:::;


Claire was a scholar

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34772952)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:06 AM
Author: Kilns4Kikes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216572)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 11th, 2019 10:26 AM
Author: longwangpoontang



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#38817589)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:05 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216559)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:11 AM
Author: bowlcut autist



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216597)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 16th, 2018 9:42 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (@realcharliebrown)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#36255593)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2018 1:23 PM
Author: longwangpoontang



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#36979191)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 19th, 2018 8:39 AM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,.. (🍊👱🏻‍♂️2020)




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37055152)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 21st, 2018 6:31 PM
Author: nyuug (Spaceporn = CUCKED for LIFE. I NEVER forget!)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37068231)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 24th, 2018 5:53 AM
Author: boiroast tp



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37291125)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2019 7:58 PM
Author: .,..,....,.....,.,....,,....,......,......,,.,.,..




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#38156666)