Well, the next morning after a bit of a challenging standoff the night before. I made a blenderful of smoothie (already eating healthier!) and offered her some. She said yes. So made two glasses. One a regular glass and the other this martini glass with a straw going through some sliced pinapple, grapes, and strawberries. It looked amazing, like Isaac himself made it on the deck of the Love Boat.

I presented her with both of them and said "Here, you don't get the special glass though," and gave her the regular one and then I took a long sip out of the cocktail one. She was pissed! She wouldn't drink hers... right away. Eventually she did and we kind of did our own thing throughout the day and I didn't see her til much later that night.

We had sex. Good sex. For the first time in over two months! This was the first "tangible" result of the process.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29044398)

My red pill reading happened by accident when I found "the rational male". This was about a year after a near marriage breakup where my wife complained about boredom etc. She met up with some old friends, including an ex boyfriend alpha, who I've told her never to contact again. The marriage councilor (who was great) got us to keep it together and claims that my wife never was unfaithful. I don't know, if a woman wants to fuck around it's easy enough to hide it.

So here I am. 44 yo. Married to my alpha widow wife. Wishing I could go back to when I was a desperate 28 yo beta and read about TRP.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29044472)

So again I’ll ask, how many is too many? For an Alpha Widow, one’s enough.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29044591)

I ramped up dread and expectations a little too quickly, at first, so went into monk mode around April, and spent time lurking, reading, lifting, and slowly applying. Lost 40 lbs of fat, doing 5x5, and dressing better. Other women start noticing, touching arm, etc.

Since upping my SMV sex had been more frequent, but not any better, (but I was happy to even have a starfish at the moment). At the beginning of the month, I think we had our main event, although it wasn't as terrible as I was expecting, so there may be more on the horizon. I made my vision for our family clear, and I was also upfront with my boundaries. There was feelz and tearz, and a huge comfort test at the end where she said, "I don't fit in in your plan for the future." I grabbed her, kissed her on the head and explained that in my vision her and I are operating as Captain and First Officer, and that I wanted more than anything for her to be First Officer, but that I can't make that choice for you. "This is the direction this family is headed, I want you to come with us." Told her I loved her and went to lift.

That night it was on, the most eager to please she's been, ever, in ten years. She couldn't see my face, but I was almost laughing, thinking "why does my dong hurt?" and hearing Morpheus telling me, "Because you've never used it before."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29048299)

Ugh....

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29048327)

I wasn't always beta. In high school I was shredded, worked out 10 times a week, did what the fuck I wanted, fucked almost any girl I wanted, and was happy. Then I met my wife. Sexy as fuck punk girl, I had to have her, so I got her. Then it went down hill, we were "soul mates", we were "meant to be together" you know the Disney bullshit. But I still regained a little bit of my attitude but was slowly catering to her, because "I wanted, to make her happy".

I stopped working out in the mornings.

I got her pregnant.

I went from a fairly cut 175 to a soft 225......and felt like shit. Barely getting laid at all, I thought maybe this is how it's supposed to be. I was buying into all the bullshit. I never wanted to get married, she knew that. It's just a fucking piece of paper. So we got married when our daughter was 2. I was getting bored with this shit but kept it all inside, I couldn't upset my princess now could I?

Just work, pay the bills, come home, fuck once a week maybe, everyone is happy.

Jesus fucking christ.

Fast forward to two months ago. I was in despair. A shell of a man who just got castrated by his wife as she walked out. All I could do is Google "wife called me a bitch ass pussy". THANK FUCKING GOD I DID. My life changed forever. I was brought here. You can read my victim puke if you can stomach it.

I immediately started lifting again while she was gone. I deployed STFU and didn't cry for hr to come back. I actually started to not give a fuck of she did. She then text me one day and asked if I wanted to go out to dinner. I said no. I then picked her up and had my daughter with me and we went to the zoo, my plans, didn't ask her, we just went. It was actually a good day. My new (old) attitude was already getting positive results from my daughter, and my wife was in awe.

She came back home two days later. Everything has fucking changed for the better already. I fuck with her and she loves it. We fuck at least every day, if not more, and it's good sex. She calls me an asshole (half jokingly) at least every day, and I love it. I made her cry last night because I wouldn't go in the store to get her something but instead told her if she wanted it, she should go in. Great sex was had an hour later.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29050878)

He thinks it's a thing of pride that he made his wife cry. Yet he still wants to be with this woman (who called him a ball-less pussy) for some reason. Freak.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29050938)

LOL why would a man want to be with a woman who calls him a bitchass pussy with no balls. she obv has zero respect for him... the daughter prob heard everything too lol. Jesus I can't imagine my mom EVER saying something like that to my da's regardless of how angry she was at him

oh and the guy said SHE came home... does thAt mean she just abandoned him and the daughter? lol

and why is he happy he made her cry? He thinks being an alpha is synonymous with being a dick

this guy is freak city

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29311526)

Kids did all of their chores this morning, wife and I were out running some errands and I decided to get the kids Taco Bell for lunch. I'll do this for them once a month and they had certainly earned it today.

Placed the order, paid at the first window, pulled forward to the second window and the young girl at the window asked "any sauces with your order?" I replied "mild, please." She asked "exactly how many do you want?" and I said "exactly 7.4." She smiled and laughed a true laugh (throwing her head back to reveal her teeth).

My wife in the passenger seat said "I think she liked your joke," to which I responded "of course she did." This turned wife on a little bit and while we were waiting for the food she began rubbing my bicep and tricep on my right arm. We got the food and headed home. Upon emptying the bag we found 7 sauce packets and then one extra. On the extra one was written ".4" along with a smiley face. This drove my wife crazy (in a good way) and she has been all over me physically since then.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#29051764)

then probly not sorry

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31212244)

MGTOW ur not trying to pick up women

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31212917)

Mgtow is a lifestyle that is a reaction t0 taking the red pill

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31213603)

I wasn't planning to have sex, but I knew that giving her a back and shoulder massage gets her in the mood sometimes. Off course when I started to initiate she turned around with some snide remark. Basically a shit test, soft no. I told her that I would like to have sex, but in the same instance got up, trying not to look butt hurt and left to put the cream away. As i walked away I said that leave it, because I know it would result in starfish, maintenance lackluster sex, and I want some passion.

Blue pill, weaksauce me then got in bed and when she got in bed beside me got up and watched t.v. on the couch.

I am re-reading WISNIFG. Just now, 12% into the book it dawned on me.

I am still trying to negotiate her desire. I want to scream at her that she owes me sex.

I am still that little boy to scared to ask or tel what I want straightforward. It seems I am the master of the covert contract. Even while I am doing it I don't recognize it for what it is.

I am also seeing a friend of mine this afternoon. He once told his wife after just having the fuck enough that she can stick her pussy on her back and let the dogs fuck her, he is checking out. He made it clear that they will be divorced as soon as humanly possible.

So am reading WISNIFG and thinking of this guy, and how it turned his marriage around, and for the first time since I allege that I have swallowed the pill, I think I am finally getting it.

Even though I lost weight, and are lifting again. Even though I dress better and is trying to lead my family more. Even though I now rarely Um and ah when a decision needs to be made, from where to eat to finances. I am still a validation seeking child. To scared to take what he wants.

To scared of her feelz.

Even though I just got it, My lightbulb moment, I think that from today I can truly say thank you MRP.

Watch this space. The pill is finally swallowed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31213745)

Have a very Red Pill Christmas.

If you are inclined to capitalize on the current wave, and have a desire to become a - albeit small - agent in the greater Culture War, the you might just consider exposing yourself to these relative strangers and doing a bit of Red Knighting.

Black Knighting, as we are all aware, is the overt process of using the established rules of liberal social justice against its very proponents. A Voice For Men does this on an institutional level, and recently some serious overtures between the MHRM and the Manosphere have resulted in the metaphor of the MHRM being guerrilla warriors to the independent sniping of the various Manosphere blogs and other outlets (lookin' at you, r/theredpill). Both, it was reasoned, were valuable techniques that could work in concert.

I tend to support that idea.

To that end, consider Red Knighting: the covert agency of advancing Red Pill memes and ideas in conflict with the established feminist paradigm. The purpose of this is not to convince or convert any SJWs - gods forbid, they're our best recruiting tool! - but to be seen engaging in dialog with said SJW with amused mastery.by others who are less convinced of the shrill righteousness of their cause.

A good Red Knight may never publicly reveal his allegiance to TRP, but can turn what SJWs call "microagressions" into a verbal martial art, with a little practice. You don't have to go all SJW-y to do it, either. You, too, can be a subversive Red Knight in your life, particularly on your travels during the holidays, quietly perfecting your own approach to TRP while also subtly lending your voice and (most importantly) your actions to relentlessly (but quietly) fighting this battle underground.

Our strength is not in our ability to organize and form a great, grand movement that can force social change at the meta level. The guerrillas of AVfM can guard that flank. In the Manosphere, our strength is in our decentralization and pervasiveness in society. Here's how "microaggressions" can really be used to the benefit of positive masculinity.

You can start by refusing to rubber-stamp the "conventional wisdom" about a lot of our key issues by simply stating your opinion in short, controlled bursts. Your refusal to participate in the madness is, in and of itself, a statement. Short, pithy, borderline-trite come-backs that tend to shut down the conversation are best, and the holiday season - with the SJWs festively coming home to spread their crusade of bitter outrage to their families - is an outstanding place for a nascent Red Knight to pursue some entertaining bits of guerrilla ontology.

Some examples: "Pay equity? Not until draft equity."

"Police report or it didn't happen."

"Feminism? I prefer science."

"Thankfully feminism broke the traditional gender role of me having to give a shit."

"One in five? Not according to the Department of Justice. Of the Obama Administration."

"Yeah, it's sexist. So is biology. I'm OK with that."

"If gender is a social construct why aren't little gay boys socialized straight by our dominant cishetero patriarchal culture? Oh, because their sexuality isn't a choice? Either is mine. I'm comfortable with that."

"You don't get to tell me how to be a man. Any more than I get to tell you how to try to be a woman. Thanks, feminism."

"Marrying a feminist increases your chances of divorce. Kinda like buying a pretty house on a fault line. But I'd love to hear of some actual evidence to the contrary."

"Equilibrium is a far more effective and pragmatic approach than equality."

"You cannot negotiate desire."

"Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically."

"I'd be more inclined to consider pay inequity once there were more than 70 men employed for every hundred women."

"Which do you think has more rapes, UVA or a Federal Penitentiary?"

"Women control sex. Men control commitment. Everywhere. Always."

"Women talk. Men act."

"Equality or special treatment? Pick one and stick with it."

"It is not my obligation to change our society so that you may feel better about your life."

"Do not mistake my devotion to civility as approval or acceptance of your behavior."

"End sexist gender roles? That's just what I wrote on my Selective Service application. What did you write on yours?"

"Men have the right to withdraw their participation when it is not in their best interests. If it's a woman's body and her choice, then that is ours."

"How is reproductive coercion different from rape? Just curious."

"In every presidential election in the era of mass media, the more attractive candidate has won. Why will this cycle be different?"

"Fatherhood is a sacred responsibility. Do not mock it." "My sperm is viable until I'm in my 70s. I can afford to be choosy."

"Any reasonable man considers his relationships with women fungible. Occasionally he might find worthy of further investment. But that's a rare thing, these days. Like the last crap of a dying unicorn."

"I really just don't see the point to most men getting into a real relationship, these days. Really, what's in it for them?"

"The heart wants what the heart wants. And sometimes the heart wants a girl with a sweet-disposition, a pretty smile, big boobs, and no interest whatsoever in social justice causes." "Feminists make great employees and lousy wives."

"If I was really ever going to treat you as an equal, we'd be fist-fighting already. You should value my sexism." " 'Decent' is just another term for 'suppressed.' "

"Remember that your ability to complain about misogyny was purchased with the blood of patriarchs."

"Most men feel that feminism is about equality the way that most African Americans feel that the Confederate Battle Flag is about Southern pride and heritage."

"Nature makes a Woman. It takes other Men to make a Man."

"Why is the answer to fixing society's problems constantly hinging on convincing men to behave more like women?"

"Men built Western Civilization. You really don't think we could bust it? Or let it die from neglect out of spite?"

"There is as much evidence of 'The Patriarchy' as there is of the 'Vast Satanic Sexual Abuse Conspiracy' the FBI found exactly no evidence of."

"How is your definition of feminism functionally different than the definition of humanism?"

"If you had a choice between true social and economic equality that left you single until you die alone, or a lifetime of bliss with a loving partner in an overtly sexist society, which one would you choose to live in?"

"Sure, your partner count doesn't work against you. Unless you believe in science."

"If you're strong and independent, why would you want a man?" "Do you need a man? No? Then don't worry. You probably won't get one."

"Wan't to stop campus rape? Stay out of college. Not you, Cupcake, I'm talking to you fellas. Seriously. It's a money pit and a minefield of bad decisions. Take a couple of years off and figure out what you want to do, first. It's not like your looks are suddenly going to collapse. Cupcake can date what's . . . left on campus."

"It's not 'Madonna and Whore'. It's 'Wife and Future Ex-Wife. Get it straight."

"The rarest of delicacies among die-hard feminists is wedding cake."

"Among the gender stereotypes feminism managed to successfully smash were chivalry and the incentive to commitment. You're on your own."

"If it 'shouldn't matter' who leads the relationship, then it shouldn't matter to you who will lead mine. Here's a hint: it will be me."

"So what will women do in a few years when cheap temporary vasectomies essentially rip their control over their reproduction away? Start hanging out in bars begging for fertilization?"

"Oh, yeah, that's just what a man wants to come home to: an aging, bitter executive with a freezer full of eggs and a predisposition toward divorce. That's a manly dose of marital and domestic bliss, right there."

"Men of quality are not attracted to your resume, no matter how many times your girlfriends tell you they are."

And so on. You get the gist. Subtle but direct jabs of Red Pill goodness.

Use it sparingly, with amused mastery, and best against those outside of your immediate social circle. Never get angry, never raise your voice, never loose that cocky grin and steely gaze. But when that perky SJW with the nose ring starts screaming about rape culture, or that embittered corporate feminist starts talking about gender oppression, smile . . . and then go at it like a gentleman.

Merry Christmas, Red Knights. Go forth and be Men for the holidays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31213768)

read this 5+ times and still dont get wtf it's supposed to mean

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31214708)

Not such a bad thing, right?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31213769)

BODY well this is the story of my married life we are in different professions Me (37) in Sales wife (35) highly educated working as a software analyst Phd doctorate High income group HB8 we met on a website started chatting found out she was a very recent widow , her ex husband( same profession as her different company) had died of car accident and they had only been married for 3 years , anyway at that point of time she wanted to remarry again along with me she was also chatting with some other potential suitors as well one guy in particular whom she was interested in( same profession as her) and met him 2/3 times (formal meeting) but he wasn't interested coz didn't want a widow to be his first wife or so due to family pressures , fast forward we continue and in 3 years we get married . Earlier during the courtship she would talk about her husband a lot , but as he was dead and secondly it was a mental trauma she had gone through thirdly before him she never had any boyfriends so i thought it to be natural , it can happen to anybody so no big deal for me i never use to bother.After marriage she was living with her parents and in their own house as she had job obligations there for two to three years more so she could not shift to my city and i use to travel to her city once a month for a week or so and she would travel to my city along with her parents once in 6 months in holidays this arrangement kept going for next 4 years till she was able to complete her work and study obligations , after first year she became pregnant . The complex (condos) were she use to live with her parents there was this guy who was stay at home father who had a son who was having some mental deformity , she always use to tell how good he was and continuously use to talk about him and praise him that he stays at home and takes care of the kid while his wife worked and here is you who live in a different city and work you should come here and settle like him and take care of kids and i will work , i told her to fuck it nothing doing i am not a kind of a guy who will live off on my wife's salary ever going to take her money . Fast forward she shifts to my city along with her parents and one more kid lands in between so now there are two kids between us . once she shifted here one of these days i was just checking my old laptop which i had given to her 2/3 years back and( which she stopped using once she moved in with me as she bought a new one) upon checking the history of that old laptop i found out that she use to chat with random guys on chatting websites /rooms and they would be around the world but not from our country but some random guys this was couple of months after our first born that was the time she was doing a job and studying taking care of the kid along with the help of her parents ,on confrontation she told me and assured me that this was harmless chatting as no body would ever meet up as these guys live in different countries they will never come and she travelling anywhere without me is out of question for her and these were harmless chatting rooms with was purely waste of time with no future and a time pass when she was bored with her job kid and pressures of life she would go to chatting rooms on net and all these people were from different countries and no hanky panky was there as per her fine i took the crap with a pinch of salt . secondly looked more and found her some google scrapbook she had asked somebody in the near by area in her city .. a person from her known profession to be friend in scrapbook .... but when that guy asked her to meet she doesn't reply back and goes awol .

Now one thing more after marriage whatever electronic gadgets like laptop , cellphone and other things it is always bought by me and upgraded by me neither she is interested and neither has time to buy them she is dam busy . second instance or red flag ,one day got the hold of her phone found out she had a another face book profile by her real same name and another mail id by the same name which i didn't knew about on confrontation she said she plays some candy crush saga and she need some lives and told me as you have seen both of them you can see i never interacted with anybody and had the same friends and same ppl on the on the real profile as well good enough checked that mail yup spam messages etc were there but no real mail sent to anybody etc no chats on face book no messages sent or received and basically nothing i can pin point out towards her took this one also with a pinch of salt as well .Last year as i wanted to make some call asked her for her phone and she gave it to me made the call and suddenly message section opened it was android in that one of her male married with kids colleague had asked what time she would be leaving as his shift is till 8 pm ,( she doesn't work late evenings) no ans from her side no idea and then another message that why is she not replying to her messages and when i asked her she told he is a colleague and must be some work related messages she has no idea what he is talking about that guy is still in her whats app and he has left that job but no messages has been exchanged checked it couple of times as people on Reddit says trust but validate .Well things move more forward there is another guy now he logins in the picture she continuously tells me he is her competition in work place and this and how she hates him one day she left her Facebook open on ipad and i find out that she has secretly wished him happy birthday and kept it hidden and next time i find her reading his horoscope in newspaper the crap she gives me is that some people in her office told her that this guy is doing some shitty website stuff so she just wants to be sure what her enemy is up to through luck and karma . N ow the fourth guy logs in the picture this guy is her supervisor level person and she tells me stories that this guy is having an affair in office with another woman she is( practically there i know) who in turn is also married with kids news come that there is an office party at one of the colleague house after her promotion ppl from office are going to the party directly from office wife goes out of the way to dress up for that party carries all her stuff to the office changes and goes beats my logic her given logic to me is some ppl would be coming from home so wanted to look better so dressed up like that (even this guy was attending that party) now i hear this guy is also on his way out serving notice period.

Earlier also i use to notice things before redpiil but use to take them lightly apart from couple of questions here and there never use to give it much of a thought now after reading married redpill AWALT and divorce rape etc . i simply would like to ask couple of questions from married redpill thoughtful answers will be really appreciated .

My questions

1 The previous husband whos pics she still hides (as they have come up in front of me some times but i do not react) is it some shit test she that casually puts me into to see my reaction and places these pics in front of me or were i can find them while searching some stuff or she is an alpha widow stil living in her ex husbands aura.

2 was that stay at home father( even he is well educated) about that guy whom she used to rant so much was that guy screwing her, sometimes i wonder? coz i knew that with her parents at home it was practically impossible for him to come down at their place at any one given point of time . there was no way she could have bought him home and at his end he had a 24 hours male nurse and kid at home , meeting him outside is a possibility ? but for that they would need to go to a hotel or something but she being so busy the possibility looks very remote i still wonder till today ..... please advice . was it her just usual shit test or was it something else now ive started thinking after reading redpill awalt

3 in our verbal fights she accuses me of cheating which ive never done is she trying to hide some guilt thing again with all the men i ve written above .

4 divorce rape in our verbal duels she simply tells me go and fuck whom ever i want to and she would marry somebody from her own profession and during our fights i have told her you want to leave you find somebody else i care a dam and in case you would get 100 men even i would get 99 women she agrees to it comes up with reply that first you find somebody i will find somebody else too . she says i can find a guy for myself in seconds i do not have dearth but i cannot find a father to my kids so i have to live with you god knows what it means is the kids being used as bait here a blue pill question here .

5 in redpill what ive read is women do not respect you observe how they are talking to other men well in that case i am always shouted at and in case some random guy from work calls she is sweet like sugar she treats me like shit .

6 in front of kids she treats me like shit , in public she never sits with me she insults me in public like anything in front of relatives she is ok with me .

7 sex happens once in 3 months . that too after lot of begging simple duty sex forget anything else wham bam thank you mam.

Am i dealing with alpha widow and who is riding cc even in marriage with other random guys who are from same profession as her who just come out of nowhere and then simply vanish without trace .?

Or a super cheat with skills which have be honed to super perfection and super hamster considering her iq level which is above normal from day to day women she was sure to have done communicated with other guys but cleaned all the traces of everything to be caught in near future .

Am i dealing with a woman who is giving me all the hints in covert language which i am not able to understand but at the same time trying to put my logical mind to rest by telling me the guys you ask questions about are not worth it .

thanks for reading any answers with analytical and thoughtful thinking will be really appreciated

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31213781)

EVERYONE GET DOWN HERE AND READ THIS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3027411&forum_id=2#31214664)

On a blue little Island of Sala-ma-Sond, Lucy the Poosey was queen of the pond.

A convenient little pond. It was clean. It was neat. The water was warm. There was plenty of meat.

The Pooseys had everything posseys might need. And they were all happy. Quite happy indeed.

They were… until Lucy, the queen of them all,

Decided the cocks she ruled were too small.

“Imma Poosey,” said Lucy, “of all that I see.