However, the Galaxy Gun shoots fucking MISSILES, and it's never adequately explained why the Empire couldn't simply slap these on a Star Destroyer instead of building some stationary gun. Unsurprisingly, like most of Dark Empire this weapon was quietly forgotten about by other writers and its destructive potential was never followed up on.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29484834)

Remember that droid that has a shitty motivator and breaks down at the start of A New Hope? The one that lets Luke buy R2 instead? Well, it turns out that droid is SKIPPY THE FORCE DROID. As revealed in the Star Wars Tales comics, Skippy is a Force-sensitive droid who has a premonition that if he's bought by Luke the Rebellion will be defeated and the Emperor will triumph. So like a bro he breaks down then and there to SAVE THE GALAXY.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29484929)

I laughed so fucking hard when I read that. you can read it with at least a dozen different inflections and mental images, all equally hilarious

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29486089)

BUT WAIT, there's more! It turns out Vader was just playing along and he actually just wanted the Crown Jewels of Alderaan, which Leia put up as collateral. Why does he want them? Well, it's not actually clear, but he manages to steal them while Leia is distracted with whatever counts as a plot in this comic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29484978)

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Star_Wars_48:_The_Third_Law

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#35026333)

The Sun Crusher, thought up by well-known sci-fi dipshit Kevin J. Anderson, is a tiny one-man ship that has:

-Its own hyperdrive

-Torpedoes capable of exploding a sun, which move at basically lightspeed and are therefore unstoppable. Oh and those torpedoes also insta-destroy any ship they hit too.

-Armor so strong it can absorb the Death Star's superlaser

The ship is hijacked by Kyp Durron, who is basically the Star Wars equivalent of a school shooter and goes on a rampage blowing up Imperial systems and installations. Eventually he feels guilty and flies it into a black hole to destroy it, but survives by using the Force to wedge himself into a tiny message capsule (not flame).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485070)

Am I the only one who always thought Thrawn was basically just "hmm, so what if evil blue Picard GO!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485641)

I rate you as the revelation in Jedi Prince (man, that series was dumb) that Emperor Palpatine had a son, and that son had THREE EYES for some reason. Also, shooting lightning out of one's hands is apparently a hereditary Palpatine power, and a fraudulent son of Palpatine is identified because he doesn't shoot the lightning out the right way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485314)

Needless to say, this is a silly development because the entire point of ROTJ was that Luke could NEVER fall to the Dark Side, and that's why he was a great Jedi. But that all goes by the wayside so we can have Evil Luke be the emperor's lackey.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485496)

CLOWN UNIVERSE

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485603)

edit: http://www.againwiththecomics.com/2011/02/jar-jar-binks-story-by-tony-millionaire.html

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485667)

Eventually Leia runs into him while trying to stop a fanatical religious cult and cuts him in two during a lightsaber fight, aided by the fact she is a mobile human and not a fat slug.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485738)

In that vein, I rate you as the EU retconning the Coruscant celebration at the end of ROTJ being the "Coruscant Uprising" where millions of people were killed and the planet failed to be liberated for several more years.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485875)

Terrifyingly, that change is still canon, unlike most of the EU.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485897)

...So he's like a Protoss Dragoon?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29486071)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485489)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3a5j8PgQxg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3083098&forum_id=2#29485617)

I rate you as the revelation that the Solos are actually a dynasty of Corellian monarchs that Han Solo is probably descended from, which is cited by C-3PO as justification his blood is royal enough to justify marrying Princess Leia.