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Do any inhousemos here regret the fact that youre not a real lawyer?
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:27 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637553) |
Date: March 19th, 2018 12:29 PM Author: hairraiser effete hell lol wtf. No. I regret that I have to work for a living at all. Being an in-house drone is simply the least bad option. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637561) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:34 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage I was hoping people would argue my premise and reassure me that us inhousemos ARE real lawyers (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637603) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:35 PM Author: hairraiser effete hell I don't know what the fuck you think a real lawyer is or why inhousemos aren't one, but you appear to be attaching value to the status of being a "real" lawyer. You have internalized GC flame that you need to work on eradicating. Competition over meaningless status is poison. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637614) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:37 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage I know, you’re right. Sometimes i hate having to explain to friends and family that yes, i am a lawyer despite being inhouse. They think I’m lying (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637625) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:36 PM Author: hairraiser effete hell lol what the fuck. Outside of the legal profession nobody cares about this hierarchy. If you just say "I'm a lawyer, I work for $Company" they think you're in court all day handling litigation. Who the fuck cares.
Even if your friends and family really are this prestige-obsessed, though, seriously fuck it. You can't hold your happiness hostage to their inability to move beyond GC flame. |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:39 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage My family and friends are proles and think I should be in court every day. When i tell them i work for a corp, they say, “oh, so you’re not a lawyer then?” (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638064) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:47 PM Author: amethyst bisexual wagecucks school (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638109) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:49 PM Author: hairraiser effete hell Jfc so your prole family & friends don't understand the legal profession and this is making you dissatisfied with your job? You could live up to their expectations if you grounded out $40K doing absolutely miserable DUI defense all day every day, is that what you want? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638122) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:51 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage I never said i was dissatisfied with my job, i just hate having to explain again and again to them that i AM a lawyer and that there are different types of lawyers (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638141) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:20 PM Author: amethyst bisexual wagecucks school Yeah there’s alpha trial Lawyers, and then there’s cuck Inhouse Lawyers who stare at boring documents all day and would piss themselves in a courtroom (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638324) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:29 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage Sup (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638376) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:39 PM Author: godawful jew The climb is all there is. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637647) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:45 PM Author: Domesticated round eye (Xo 2018) is suddenly a good thing. I really do like it here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637695) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:36 PM Author: hairraiser effete hell For any value of (xo 20xx), the mental illness is roughly the same, we're just mentally ill in different ways. We've definitely made huge strides on the whole prestige thing. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638044) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:46 PM Author: violet cuckoldry (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638098) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:46 PM Author: Domesticated round eye (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638105) |
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Date: May 15th, 2023 6:02 PM Author: sooty state (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#46315302) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:29 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat every day i wish i could produce more scholarship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637565) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:30 PM Author: godawful jew Hated lit when I was in it. Now I miss the competitive aspect. Might have to CSLG it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637574) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:34 PM Author: Frum stead pistol Yeah because I only felt like a real lawyer when I was drafting responses to the 4th set of rogs in biglaw. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637598) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 3:43 PM Author: Aphrodisiac gas station therapy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638952) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 3:43 PM Author: electric gay stain hahaha (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638958) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:35 PM Author: violet cuckoldry look we're all fags here and im no exception but ljl im nowhere near *that* much of a fag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637615) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:54 PM Author: sinister base Would be cool to be like CSLG but LOLOLOL at being jealous of biglawyers. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637746) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:54 PM Author: Impressive cumskin As a 1st-4th year Corporate/M&A associate I was basically a highly paid assistant/bitch on anything that actually mattered to a client, and anything I "QBed" was something that just needed to get done and no one actually cared what I did as long as it wasn't obvious malpractice. Admittedly I wasn't great at it, as I'm not a particularly anal proofreader naturally.
Now inhouse and having gotten more senior I actually advise senior execs who know me well and have worked with me for years, and care about my work enough to want to discuss in detail, on a moment's notice. I advise them on legal issues that all have eight, nine and ten figures worth of relevance to their business (which is well into the eleven figure range). They treat me with way more respect and warmth than any client I ever had at a firm. They know my kids names and where my house is and they text me on the weekends when our shared alma mater wins a big game or the like. They literally get asked every year if they want to keep me as their attorney, and every year they re-up. I do honestly feel like I know the most out of anyone on the planet about my little fiefdom that is a mix of commercial legal points, specific business and ops issues, and a host of stupid little "cutting edge" topics that related to what we sell and how we build and deliver it.
I would give it all up for like 15-20% more in total comp to work similar hours on similar work. To go back to a firm I'd need to make at least 2x what I currently make (roughly 500k) and have a guarantee I wouldn't be fired for three years while I built out a book, and even then I would never go to a big international firm because I would never want to charge $700 an hour or whatever big international firm rate minimums are these days. |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat " They literally get asked every year if they want to keep me as their attorney, and every year they re-up."
what the fuck |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: Impressive cumskin Your exec clients don't get solicited for feedback at review time? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637767) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:57 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat they get the fucking choice of whether to reup like u are an aarp subscription wtf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637776) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:57 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage Ya, wtf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637779) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:00 PM Author: Impressive cumskin Yeah dude. Didn't know this until I got switched under my current boss, but a standard part of the feedback form is a question that's essentially "are you happy or do you want a change?" Any time they change someone in legal's support mapping after review time it's a dead giveaway that they got negative feedback on that question from the exec they left, and 95% of the time it's the beginning of the process of the person leaving or getting pushed out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637792) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:04 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat sounds terrible (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637817) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:07 PM Author: Impressive cumskin If someone's motivated to give negative feedback on that question you were already fucked before it was asked. But the defense of it is that it forces people to build strong relationships with their business clients and be visible and embedded, i.e. to maximize the costs of a transition. So it's stressful, but I also think it's why we have a surprisingly small number of turboaspies and psychos here. Any whiff of that when you're interviewing gets you dinged asap, because if the exec clients hate you here you're fucked. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637842) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:09 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat also fucks up incentives to agree with whatever your clietns need and then you get salle yooed
Yoo was legally ambitious. In her first performance review, Kalanick told her that she needed to be more “innovative.” She stewed over the feedback and unloaded on her husband that night over a game of tennis, she recalled in the podcast on Legal Talk Network. “I was fuming. I said to my husband, who is also a lawyer: ‘Look, I have such a myriad of legal issues that have not been dealt with. I have constant regulatory pressures, and I’m trying to grow a team at the rate of growth of this company.’”
By the end of the match, Yoo said she felt liberated. “This is the first time as a lawyer that I’ve been asked to be innovative. What I’m hearing from this is I actually don’t have to do things like any other legal department. I don’t have to go to best practices. I have to go to what is best for my company, what is best for my legal department. And I should view this as, actually, freedom to do things the way I think things should be done, rather than the way other people do it.” |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:10 PM Author: Glittery Beta Depressive Theater Stage Cr. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637867) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:54 PM Author: violet cuckoldry fucking LJL, and getting a 9 figure payout for setting her client up to fail for the benefit of herself and whatever other execs made 7, 8, 9 figures during the period that she let the client run buckwild selling out an entity you're supposed to have loyalty to for personal gain, story of america 2018
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:59 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat i dont think u are laughing at the right thing, basicalyl she was incompetent and let the execs/company run roughshod over her but got paid in the end cause everyone else did
not like she purposefully shit up her job just to make money, she just couldnt handle it. tbf neither could travis in the end |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:07 PM Author: violet cuckoldry becoming a shameless yes man in the name of "innovation" and in the process allowing your client to wreck itself with regulatory violations and the like sounds a whole lot like the old saw they throw at you in every professional ethics CLE where you're supposed to object and if necessary walk away from the client rather than be complicit in shady shit
maybe there's more gray area in the issues she caused/allowed to crop up than what im imagining tho |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:12 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat pretty sure she was just gonna be fucked no matter what, but at least she got $paid$ (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638271) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:16 PM Author: violet cuckoldry fair and tbf i ignored a fundamental principle in attributing to malice something that is easily explained by stupidity |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:00 PM Author: Impressive cumskin I 100% agree this system would be at a disaster at Uber or really any company prioritizing growth over margins, Amazon included. It only works because when we have to we can team up with Finance or Corp Comms and say “you will lose money” or “you will be publicly embarrassed.” We do still have the “that’s literally, definitely, criminal penalties illegal” hammer we break out when we have to, which is like once every three years for only the dumbest junior execs. But yeah I would never work for someone like Travis Kalanick. The whole point of the culture of embedding Legal is that they treat you like a peer and you have credibility as someone who shares the same goals and understands them like the rest of the senior leadership on a senior exec’s staff. If you just want to be a subject matter expert and give generic advice on a legal topic without applying it to a specific business’ context you won’t get hired/won’t last here unless you’re just a securities 34 act form monkey or something like that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638198) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:01 PM Author: Crystalline galvanic locale kitty cat keep talking shit about TMF asshole (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638203) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 12:57 PM Author: sinister base Yea, it all sounded great except for this part. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637778) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:01 PM Author: Frum stead pistol Wow, sounds really cutting edge (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637794) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:02 PM Author: Impressive cumskin LOL. Not at all. It's the are country inhouse dream. I highly recommend it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35637802) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:10 PM Author: cream alpha station Nutella is mocking you shitbrains (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638264) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:19 PM Author: amethyst bisexual wagecucks school (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638314) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:25 PM Author: Impressive cumskin Oh wow really? Gosh I had no clue. You’re clearly an expert reader of message board post tone, so please feel free to go through the archives and point me toward more examples of when people are being sarcastic. Thanks in advance. I’m truly shocked by what you’ve revealed to me here. It’s like my whole world is turned upside down. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638349) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:29 PM Author: Maroon cowardly pozpig den Being a "real lawyer" sucks. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638011) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:40 PM Author: peach marvelous main people site (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638066) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 2:32 PM Author: Appetizing office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35645940) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 1:55 PM Author: Bateful Sienna Party Of The First Part Community Account keeps me up at night (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638165) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:09 PM Author: Saffron talking address Prefer inhouse to pvt practice. Become a meaningful and trusted team member with the business. We have a mini silicon valley type thing at my company and I'm doing much more with that dept which is exciting. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638252) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:12 PM Author: amethyst bisexual wagecucks school Pro tip: lawyers aren’t meaningful to the business. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638269) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 11:01 AM Author: Appetizing office I don't understand why firm lawyers always spout this nonsense. You guys are like a rung below in-house when it comes to the attention of senior managers in large businesses. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35644528) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 11:37 AM Author: Saffron talking address Don't know what industry you're involved in, but I'm in the financial industry. Everything is regulated and you need solid attorneys (and for all the hate Are Reptile gets, solid compliance professionals) to make sure shit is kosher.
Domestic and foreign regulations are fucking killer and a mine field to navigate. Things are rarely killed by my dept, but it's in large part because we find some way to make it happen. |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:11 PM Author: lime nighttime love of her life corner i despise the fact that im a lawyer and actively try to hide it from ppl (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638266) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 2:24 PM Author: grizzly slimy multi-billionaire litigator here who regrets being one and wishes i were an inhousemo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638342) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 11:29 AM Author: Massive razzmatazz mad-dog skullcap skinny woman (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35644713) |
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Date: March 19th, 2018 3:40 PM Author: electric gay stain not at all. why do you ask? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35638932) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 10:58 AM Author: Appetizing office God no. "Real lawyers" have awful fucking jobs and are miserable people. I also have zero interest in ever being in a courtroom or interacting with judges and worrying about bullshit like procedure. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35644510) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 10:59 AM Author: amethyst bisexual wagecucks school (Guy who has to rigidly follow internal compliance and approval procedures) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35644519) |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 11:02 AM Author: Appetizing office 1) I'm not actually a compliance officer.
2) Even if I were, I would be creating internal compliance and approval procedures, not following them. You're thinking what analysts do. |
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Date: March 20th, 2018 2:36 PM Author: Metal Gaming Laptop Institution we can bald as well as the rest of em! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3922821&forum_id=2#35645974) |