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Krampusnacht offering hypos to poasters

...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
Can you send me 50 eth
odious walnut turdskin
  04/21/18
...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
...
Histrionic maniacal principal's office deer antler
  04/21/18
Option A: You must take a "vow of mostly silence" ...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
A, and this is incredible
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
sick hypo, option A
Histrionic maniacal principal's office deer antler
  04/21/18
i have a kid on the way, so B. she'll be set for life. i ...
rose metal therapy theater
  04/21/18
lol at living 20 more years also that is 20c per word.... s...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
turning it into some kind of weird mantra would almost certa...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
running the numbers here each sentence would take about 2s ...
rose metal therapy theater
  04/21/18
see above bro, this would definitely make you mentally ill (...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
it's an hour a day i would break the monotony by coming up ...
rose metal therapy theater
  04/21/18
why do you think Buddhist monks use spoken mantras? if you ...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
awesome, i get to achieve nirvana as a secondary benefit.
rose metal therapy theater
  04/21/18
WHICH words you say matter a lot like the sound "Aum&q...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
an hour a day isn't going to drive me insane.
rose metal therapy theater
  04/22/18
A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
B
elite charcoal halford
  04/21/18
is it ok if i sing at all? if so, A
violet parlor toaster
  04/21/18
B
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
ur gunna live 20 years?
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/22/18
...
titillating olive set
  04/21/18
Option A: You get to go back to high school, as a 10/10 stud...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
B and it's not even close
irradiated chrome volcanic crater
  04/21/18
B, this one is easy it's not that hard to carry around a bo...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
what if I had said 100 - 110
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
still rather be a middling IQmo than a fat washed up loser w...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
can you make a startup while in college or do u just have to...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
you have free will
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
B
titillating olive set
  04/21/18
B
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
gibs hypo
irradiated chrome volcanic crater
  04/21/18
Option A: You are given a magical staff. Each time you stron...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
lol hard to see the benefits of A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
fly to the Congo, spend couple weeks tapping the staff, fly ...
violet parlor toaster
  04/21/18
A, assuming no one else can threaten me and take the staff a...
irradiated chrome volcanic crater
  04/21/18
Nobody can steal your power by taking the staff. If the staf...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
no municipality will pay you to remove homeless those govts...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
just visit govt building and transport entire homeless popul...
French Supple Love Of Her Life
  04/21/18
B am I missing the benefits of A?
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
i can't stop laughing at this
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
Option A: One, and exactly one, of the approximately 1.28 mi...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
I'm an introvert, so B sounds like a fucking nightmare bro ...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
A, and its not even close. I could get this done in literall...
violet parlor toaster
  04/21/18
if you choose A, can you engage social media to help you?
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
yeah
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
then A
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
http://www.flyhighwi.com/
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon
  04/21/18
Option A: Pick a city, any city. You can, anytime you wish, ...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
holy shit, B, and the riddle part made it even more awesome
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
cr i'd probably be disappointed if he just straight up told ...
French Supple Love Of Her Life
  04/21/18
yep
Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon
  04/21/18
...
Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon
  04/21/18
...
violet parlor toaster
  04/21/18
Does Murphy choose randomly or does he choose important case...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
He doesn't choose randomly. He definitely has a thing for im...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
puts it over the top
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
B
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
B no question Especially in the event I get a riddle ...
Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon
  04/21/18
B I guess
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
laughsome shimmering area
  04/21/18
Option A: You will develop a large scar across your face tha...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
A sounds fun. Idk how much I'd use it though
French Supple Love Of Her Life
  04/21/18
A and it’s not even close
laughsome shimmering area
  04/21/18
A!
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
A
elite charcoal halford
  04/21/18
lol that all the applications I think of are evil A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
B
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
Irate Bright Private Investor
  04/21/18
Option A: "Mean Girls" becomes even more of a cult...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
B
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
What are salary /hours like for A?
Irate Bright Private Investor
  04/21/18
It's a lot like being a wedding singer or wedding photograph...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
The workers SEE the medal, get what it is about, and people ...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
yes
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
Holy shit option A is some next level creativity
flickering passionate party of the first part
  04/21/18
B
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
B is literally Hilton Honors gold status
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
Option A: You must pick a kid who is entering 9th grade, and...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
B, I BELIEVE
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
lol
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
If he creampies the same girl it's another $1000? Creampie ...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
this is what I assumed I'm gambling on him eventually getti...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
seems TCR you think this happening is more likely than not?
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
if it does happen, I will get tons of $ if I go with A, it'...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
This problem is extremely common and not obvious to MOST 9th...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
do public school teachers even ding you for it anymore, thou...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
hmmmm 4 years of English... one/two teachers probably do th...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
remember it's high school AND college
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
do they certainly go to college or do as much school as a ra...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
the kids who are destined to attend college will appear to h...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
college profs/TAs have so many to grade (unless it's a semin...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
Correct.
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
A
Razzmatazz mood
  04/21/18
lmao cmon man, have some faith in yourself
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
Such faith becomes less justified by the day, sadly.
Razzmatazz mood
  04/21/18
...
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
Will I still get $1,000 if I become a tranny, kidnap Charles...
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/21/18
no
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
Is the stipulation that it has to be a biological girl or is...
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/21/18
must be a biological girl and the creampie must be consensua...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
fuck, that's kind of hard. easy to find women, but very hard...
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/21/18
for option A, can you find and communicate with this person?
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
Yes
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
A definitely then
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
French Supple Love Of Her Life
  04/21/18
Option A: Scientists invent a magic helmet that protects the...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
fuck, this is really hard. i'm going with A
French Supple Love Of Her Life
  04/21/18
http://www.news.com.au/technology/science/human-body/japanes...
rose metal therapy theater
  04/21/18
not going bald, so A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
AHEM can you make an equivalent hypo for women please ...
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
you get to look at fewer disgusting bald men. that's the ben...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
...
Ivory disgusting parlour
  04/21/18
Option A: Donald Trump comes to your office and demands that...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
B
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
I can't really be fired from being a SAHM, so B it is!
Ivory disgusting parlour
  04/21/18
B
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
elite charcoal halford
  04/21/18
Option A: Hillary Clinton dies and leaves you as her sole he...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
Can TRUMP remove you if you go left?
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
Trump will have as much control over you as the law and Cons...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
There is no way in hell I could keep up the charade required...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
Ben Carson got confirmed for HUD
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
yeah but he's a black doctor, bro point is, A is an absolut...
crawly bistre spot
  04/21/18
B.
elite charcoal halford
  04/21/18
A
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/21/18
A
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
Sienna Native Hairy Legs
  04/21/18
Option A: You gain access to CharlesXII's OKCupid account an...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
A is my dream job
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/21/18
A
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
aqua site
  04/21/18
Option A: You must move to New Bedford, Massachusetts for 5 ...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
Seems like A is the easy choice though maybe there's somethi...
aqua site
  04/21/18
Can you give us some idea of the criteria we're being graded...
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
that would make the hypo way too easy.
aqua site
  04/22/18
...
Razzmatazz mood
  04/21/18
Option A: You receive complimentary round trip economy airfa...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
Assuming the airport test is reasonable (I.e. All from the t...
Razzmatazz mood
  04/21/18
It's reasonable but challenging.
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
the payoff for A is better so i'd go for it. come up with so...
irradiated chrome volcanic crater
  04/21/18
A even if I lose, a trip to Dubai is cool
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
...
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/21/18
Option A: Pick a figure from Japanese history. Any figure. H...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/21/18
lol B is funny
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
almost certainly B. I could really save an entire country fr...
Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan
  04/23/18
...
nubile nursing home community account
  04/21/18
oh i dint read the ruls, i thoughts these were everybody hyp...
violet parlor toaster
  04/21/18
no you're doing it right, the giving it to specific poasters...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
k
violet parlor toaster
  04/22/18
...
Hairless pit
  04/22/18
Option A: You will write a novel that will be very successfu...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
A
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
A
Hairless pit
  04/22/18
...
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
Option A: You are given 10 small penguins to take care of FO...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
[Just saying option A could be made into a hilarious movie] ...
white multi-colored jew abode
  04/22/18
Option B seems CR: hire a full time Komodo dragon caretaker ...
Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center
  04/22/18
A is the plot of K-9 starring Jim Belushi B is the plot o...
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
Go back to India motherfucker
obsidian plaza fat ankles
  04/22/18
...
abnormal bossy half-breed locus
  04/22/18
...
Painfully honest cruel-hearted senate newt
  04/22/18
...
nubile nursing home community account
  04/22/18
hey look it's a subthread with xo's worst posters
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center
  04/22/18
Option A: As part of a contest, you are given ONE WEEK to vi...
Underhanded deranged messiness black woman
  04/22/18
If the companies are publicly traded, then B. Otherwise, A.
Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center
  04/22/18
A without hesitation. you rent a cheapass car and start dri...
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
Option A: You are turned into a highly amorous, HIV-infested...
odious walnut turdskin
  04/22/18
...
costumed pozpig lettuce
  04/22/18
A. HIV would not kill a monkey
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
internet-worthy state
  04/22/18
...
Effete Misunderstood Preventive Strike
  04/22/18
...
wonderful degenerate
  04/22/18
...
greedy house persian
  04/22/18


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 5:08 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35889902)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:21 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891449)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:50 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895533)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 5:08 PM
Author: odious walnut turdskin

Can you send me 50 eth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35889903)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:03 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890690)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:03 PM
Author: Histrionic maniacal principal's office deer antler



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890691)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:13 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You must take a "vow of mostly silence" where you agree to only talk 2-3 times a year. However, everytime you talk, people listen. Like, the entire country listens, and a statement from you is capable of majorly shifting public opinion about whatever you say. If you talk more than 3 times a year, a knight appears and runs you through with his sword.

Option B: A high school English teacher is asked to pick one word out of the 100 most commonly used words in the English language. You are not told what word he picked. In 20 years, you will get $5 for every time you have uttered that word IN A SENTENCE during said 20 year period.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890738)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:14 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

A, and this is incredible

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890751)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:17 PM
Author: Histrionic maniacal principal's office deer antler

sick hypo, option A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890770)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:30 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

i have a kid on the way, so B. she'll be set for life.

i would split this list of 100 most common words into 8-10 sentences and commit them to memory and recite them during shower, during commute, during moments of boredom

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Most_common_words_in_English

i would also read aloud everything i'm typing on xo and elsewhere.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890831)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:36 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

lol at living 20 more years

also that is 20c per word.... saying a word out loud is far more costly than you think

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890858)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:38 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

turning it into some kind of weird mantra would almost certainly drive you insane eventually, so cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890874)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:45 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

running the numbers here

each sentence would take about 2s to utter, so 20s to run through the entire list. so $5/20s, or $15/min, or $900/hr

an hour a day of deliberate recital would bring in about $300k/yr, plus the amount brought in by incidental utterance. let's say $400k/yr, which would be 8 million in 20 years. not bad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890924)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:46 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

see above bro, this would definitely make you mentally ill (more than you already are, that is)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890937)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:49 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

it's an hour a day

i would break the monotony by coming up with creative ways to use the words

i can definitely do this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890955)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:51 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

why do you think Buddhist monks use spoken mantras?

if you say something enough times over and over again, it rewires your brain. I would not fuck around willy nilly with something like that.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890969)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:54 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

awesome, i get to achieve nirvana as a secondary benefit.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890980)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:58 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

WHICH words you say matter a lot

like the sound "Aum" is the go-to one for meditation because it apparently "sounds like" the origin/totality of the cosmos.

even if you use a longer mantra in a language you don't understand, the sounds are very important.

Saying weird contrived english sentences for an hour a day would start to sound like gobbledegook nonsense in your head (this phenomenon happens if you repeat even a single english word over and over), like a Lewis Carroll poem. You wouldn't reach nirvana. You'd get put in a psych ward.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891008)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:50 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

an hour a day isn't going to drive me insane.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893980)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:36 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890860)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:21 PM
Author: elite charcoal halford

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891123)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:32 PM
Author: violet parlor toaster

is it ok if i sing at all?

if so, A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891738)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:21 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891963)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 1:26 AM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

ur gunna live 20 years?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892287)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:03 PM
Author: titillating olive set



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890693)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:24 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You get to go back to high school, as a 10/10 stud with great athleticism, great looks, and an amazing full head of hair. You can do whatever you want in high school, you have free will. BUT...as soon as four years of high school are over, your fate becomes inescapable. You will go to college, and in college you will lose most of your hair. Then you will go to law school, and you will gain a ton of weight. You'll balloon to 300+ pounds. Then you will become a personal injury lawyer in the town you went to high school in, and you will advertise on buses and billboards. Your face will be all over these ads, and they will say "I'm too ugly to have friends, so I will FIGHT to get you the money you deserve!". Kids will gawk and say "you know that fat lawyer? he went to high school here!" and look up your yearbook photos and gaze in amazement at how hot you used to be.

Option B: You get to go back to college with 10/10 raw intellectual horsepower. You'll be the smartest undergrad on campus. However, at age 27, you will decline to an IQ of 110 - 120. How much you hydrate will determine your final IQ. If you hydrate well, it will be closer to 120. If you neglect to drink enough water, it will decline to 110.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890807)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:26 PM
Author: irradiated chrome volcanic crater

B and it's not even close

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890815)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:26 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

B, this one is easy

it's not that hard to carry around a bottle and fill it up consistently, and 120 isn't that bad

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890817)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:32 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

what if I had said 100 - 110

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890841)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:40 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

still rather be a middling IQmo than a fat washed up loser who peaked in HS. Way more QOL potential.

only tricky part of option B is having to deliberately avoid fields/careers that are only available to you because of your high IQ, because then you'd get fucked once it declines

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890889)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:38 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

can you make a startup while in college or do u just have to be a Scholar

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890872)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:39 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

you have free will

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890882)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:33 PM
Author: titillating olive set

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891197)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:23 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891969)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:04 PM
Author: irradiated chrome volcanic crater

gibs hypo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890695)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:32 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You are given a magical staff. Each time you strongly and willfully tap the staff against the ground, a homeless person appears there. (Assume they're all magically transported from San Francisco). The homeless person then will make their best effort to eke out a living on the streets in the vicinity of where you tapped the staff. You don't have any further control over these homeless people, it's not like they do your bidding or anything.

Option B: Anytime you shout "where dem boys at?", somewhere between 3-5 former members of the Dallas Cowboys will appear and do your bidding for up to 45 minutes. You can't control which Cowboys or how many: they could be guys who retired from the NFL last year, they could be geriatric guys who played 30+ years ago. They could be all offensive linemen, they could be two punters and a running back, it's all randomly determined. The sports media follows you around and runs stories about how you use this power and how well you tip.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890838)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:39 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

lol

hard to see the benefits of A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890884)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:41 PM
Author: violet parlor toaster

fly to the Congo, spend couple weeks tapping the staff, fly back, walk into San Francisco city hall, profit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891774)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:40 PM
Author: irradiated chrome volcanic crater

A, assuming no one else can threaten me and take the staff and its power. i could make a killing charging San Francisco to get rid of their homeless problem, AND by charging other cities to NOT send the homeless there. double dipping baby.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890887)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:42 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Nobody can steal your power by taking the staff. If the staff is lost or destroyed, you can just break off a tree branch and use it in the same fashion. Basically any big stick you hold has the power to generate homeless people.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890904)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:47 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

no municipality will pay you to remove homeless

those govts profit on those homeless and u can't promise where the homeless come from

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890942)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:56 PM
Author: French Supple Love Of Her Life

just visit govt building and transport entire homeless population into 1 room

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890997)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:25 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

am I missing the benefits of A?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891981)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:52 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

i can't stop laughing at this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895553)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:13 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890746)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:39 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: One, and exactly one, of the approximately 1.28 million cows in the state of Wisconsin changes color to become solid purple. You have one week to find this cow and touch it on the head. If you do this, $10 million will be yours, tax-free. If you fail, you will spend 24 hours unable to speak in human languages, instead you will only be able to moo. (Then you go back to normal).

Option B: You become the Court Jester of Rhode Island. You must move to Providence, Rhode Island. Your job is to tell jokes at official dinners and parties hosted by the Governor of Vermont. Your job is not a political appointment, so you stay in office when the Governor changes and can only be fired "for cause" such as gross misconduct. You are paid $50,000 per year with a 2.5% annual COL increase. Your pension vests after 5 years of service. If your pension vests, that means at age 60 you can retire from jesting and you will be paid your final jesting salary annually until you die.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890878)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:46 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

I'm an introvert, so B sounds like a fucking nightmare bro

gonna go with A and cheat with the internet. Offer a $100k reward for information leading to the location of the cow.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890932)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:45 PM
Author: violet parlor toaster

A, and its not even close. I could get this done in literally, one day.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891792)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:28 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

if you choose A, can you engage social media to help you?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891995)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:29 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

yeah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891996)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:31 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

then A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892012)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:54 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

http://www.flyhighwi.com/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895565)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:13 PM
Author: Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890748)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:48 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: Pick a city, any city. You can, anytime you wish, access a database that shows you every cosmetic surgery procedure anyone who lives or works in that city has had in the last 5 years. "Lives" is defined as legally domiciled, while "works" is defined as a plurality of their income being from work done in that city.

Option B: A mysterious man known to you only as "Murphy" appears between 3:00 PM and 3:15 PM on the 7th day of every month in one of the parking lots of the United Center in Chicago. Only you can see Murphy. If you come up to Murphy, he will whisper in your ear and tell you the outcome of between 3-5 cases that will be decided by the 7th Circuit Court of Appeals in the FOLLOWING month. Sometimes he will just tell you who wins the case, sometimes he will speak in riddles that require research to decipher.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890948)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:50 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

holy shit, B, and the riddle part made it even more awesome

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890958)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:55 PM
Author: French Supple Love Of Her Life

cr i'd probably be disappointed if he just straight up told me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890985)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:51 PM
Author: Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon

yep

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891301)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:51 PM
Author: Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891299)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:48 PM
Author: violet parlor toaster



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891812)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:11 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

Does Murphy choose randomly or does he choose important cases?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891067)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:13 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

He doesn't choose randomly. He definitely has a thing for important constitutional cases, but throws in a lot of important white collar or corporate law cases. He does NOT filter by how hard the outcome is to predict though, so sometimes he gives you a prediction and you're like "no shit, sherlock"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891075)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:25 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

puts it over the top

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891144)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:32 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891196)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:51 PM
Author: Splenetic Exhilarant Property Quadroon

B no question

Especially in the event I get a riddle

Helps that the time to meet Murph is when I would feel safe near UC

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891296)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:31 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B I guess

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892008)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:16 PM
Author: laughsome shimmering area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890760)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:55 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You will develop a large scar across your face that looks like railroad tracks. It will mark you as "the train boss" - every train conductor in the entire world will gasp in awe when they see you and accept and unquestioningly follow any order you give them, even if it conflicts with the orders they got from the railroad or from railroading best practice.

Option B: You develop a compulsive need to have a pacifier in your mouth. You MUST constantly suck on a pacifier when you're not speaking, and you will go stark raving mad if you go without sucking on a pacifier for more than an hour or two. On the flip side, you will become "the baby boss" - any child under the age of 3 will follow your commands. The older the kid gets, the more you'll have to work to get them to follow. So like a 1 year old will follow your instructions explicitly and immediately, while with a kid who's about to turn 3 years old tomorrow it will take like 5-10 minutes of cajoling but he/she will EVENTUALLY do as you say. You can't command the kids to do anything they're not physically or mentally capable of at that age, but kids will follow your commands even if they can't yet understand human language.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890988)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:57 PM
Author: French Supple Love Of Her Life

A sounds fun. Idk how much I'd use it though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891002)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:59 PM
Author: laughsome shimmering area

A and it’s not even close

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891023)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:02 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

A!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891034)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:20 PM
Author: elite charcoal halford

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891113)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:25 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

lol that all the applications I think of are evil

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891149)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:33 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892021)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:20 PM
Author: Irate Bright Private Investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890785)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:05 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: "Mean Girls" becomes even more of a cult classic, to the extent that it is held in as high of a regard as Homer, Virgil, or Beowulf. In fact, an entire profession exists called "Mean Girls hafiz", which is people who have memorized the entire script of Mean Girls and can recite it from memory upon request. It becomes a popular form of entertainment to invite a Mean Girls hafiz to a party or reception and have them entertain the crowd with recitations from Mean Girls. If you accept this hypo, you will become a Mean Girls hafiz, though not a great one. You'll remember the entire script, but unlike the most prestigious and highest paid hafizes, you will be unable to imitate all the voices of every single actor or actress in the film.

Option B: Anyone who watches every single Star Wars movie back-to-back in one sitting in chronological order without falling asleep gets a special medal. This medal entitles you to superior customer service: you'll cut to the front of the line at the DMV, you'll be able to get a passport next day, and you will always be treated politely when you call a customer service hotline. However, the medal only lasts for a year, and each year you must "re-certify" by watching all the Star Wars movies chronically again, including any new films that came out during the previous year.

PS by chronological order we mean in-universe chronology. So, I, II, III, Rogue One, IV, V, VI, VII, VII.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891050)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:11 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891063)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:25 PM
Author: Irate Bright Private Investor

What are salary /hours like for A?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891147)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:26 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

It's a lot like being a wedding singer or wedding photographer today. You can charge between $1,000 - $3,000 for a one to three hour show. Depends on how many scenes they want you to perform.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891155)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:37 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

The workers SEE the medal, get what it is about, and people KNOW about this medal? (no magic)

The workers give you the best feasibly possible treatment, but won't do more than can be legally provided?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891215)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:38 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

yes

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892054)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:16 PM
Author: flickering passionate party of the first part

Holy shit option A is some next level creativity

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891666)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:35 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892033)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:56 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

B is literally Hilton Honors gold status

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895581)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:32 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890843)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:09 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You must pick a kid who is entering 9th grade, and to whom you are not related. Each time that kid gets dinged for using the passive voice in a paper in high school or college, you get $500. "Dinged" means the person grading the paper circles in red and writes "do not use passive voice" or equivalent.

Option B: You get a thousand bucks everytime CharlesXII (the XO poaster, not the dead Swedish king) creampies a girl.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891058)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:11 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

B, I BELIEVE

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891070)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:14 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891081)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:15 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

If he creampies the same girl it's another $1000?

Creampie is he does not wear a condom and cums inside her vagine (she can use contraception)?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891087)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:16 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

this is what I assumed

I'm gambling on him eventually getting married and creampieing her semi-regularly til they're too old to fuck anymore

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891092)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:21 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

seems TCR

you think this happening is more likely than not?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891127)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:24 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

if it does happen, I will get tons of $

if I go with A, it's a total crapshoot. I might make a few thousand bucks, I might make nothing. I have no idea how I would go about selecting the optimal kid.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891140)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

This problem is extremely common and not obvious to MOST 9th graders

the first paper back informing them of this problem will have like 8 passive voice uses

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891157)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:31 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

do public school teachers even ding you for it anymore, though?

seems like they're lazy and might just give them a lower grade without marking it explicitly, as is required

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891190)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

hmmmm

4 years of English... one/two teachers probably do their jerbs

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891221)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:41 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

remember it's high school AND college

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891241)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:44 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

do they certainly go to college or do as much school as a random kid would?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891267)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:45 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

the kids who are destined to attend college will appear to have a supernatural glow when you look at them (only you can see this)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891272)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:49 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891282)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:44 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

college profs/TAs have so many to grade (unless it's a seminar) that very rarely do they write specific things like "passive voice" on every paper. Usually just letter grade IME

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891268)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:18 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Correct.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891103)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:32 PM
Author: Razzmatazz mood

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891195)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:33 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

lmao cmon man, have some faith in yourself

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891198)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:39 PM
Author: Razzmatazz mood

Such faith becomes less justified by the day, sadly.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891524)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:57 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895584)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:01 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan

Will I still get $1,000 if I become a tranny, kidnap CharlesXII into my "house of horror", and regularly reverse-rape him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891608)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:01 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

no

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891612)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:03 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan

Is the stipulation that it has to be a biological girl or is that force cannot be allowed?

If it's the former, I still pick A. Tons of thirsty thots that I can unleash upon him

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891621)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:08 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

must be a biological girl and the creampie must be consensual

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891639)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:13 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan

fuck, that's kind of hard. easy to find women, but very hard to get CharlesXII to be willing.

I was already sketching out a perpetual rape machine for Charles12 to basically just use his captured, imprison FUCKSTICK like a jackhammer to reward thirsty women.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891654)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:37 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

for option A, can you find and communicate with this person?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892043)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:39 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Yes

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892056)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:42 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

A definitely then

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892080)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 8:35 PM
Author: French Supple Love Of Her Life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35890856)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:18 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: Scientists invent a magic helmet that protects the user 100% from head and neck injuries. It's only good for the head and neck, there are no equivalents for other body parts. Not only does this make football safer, but it means that it becomes a social norm that men who have a strong disagreement can charge at each other at high speed and bonk heads, like goats. The winner is the one who knocks the other one off balance first. Being good at running into somebody with your head is an important social skill.

Option B: A cure for male pattern baldness is discovered. It will restore any bald man to a full, thick head of hair. However, it carries a 10% chance that after the man turns 60, his arms will become hideously deformed and useless.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891101)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:28 PM
Author: French Supple Love Of Her Life

fuck, this is really hard. i'm going with A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891167)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: rose metal therapy theater

http://www.news.com.au/technology/science/human-body/japanese-research-could-put-an-end-to-unwanted-baldness/news-story/ae22436b4e91efc70df4535971a19efa

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891208)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:52 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

not going bald, so A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891302)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:42 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

AHEM

can you make an equivalent hypo for women please

ty

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892077)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:05 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

you get to look at fewer disgusting bald men. that's the benefit for women.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893733)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:01 PM
Author: Ivory disgusting parlour



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891031)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: Donald Trump comes to your office and demands that you be fired from your job. Your boss complies and lets you go. You briefly become a celebrity among the anti-Trump left, and for at least a few weeks (or longer if you play your cards well) you will be given a lot of free and positive media attention from the liberal media.

Option B: You are given video footage of famous actor Ben Stiller sexually harassing a female costar.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891220)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:40 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891236)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:43 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891257)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:05 PM
Author: Ivory disgusting parlour

I can't really be fired from being a SAHM, so B it is!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891630)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:43 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892090)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:19 PM
Author: elite charcoal halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891107)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:41 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: Hillary Clinton dies and leaves you as her sole heir and successor in her will. You will inherit ALL of the Clinton money AND all of the Clinton Foundation's money...if and only if you agree to adopt Hillary Clinton's political positions and run for POTUS as her chosen successor. You get the money if you get elected POTUS and faithfully implement her policies. Whether or not you "faithfully" adopt and implement her policies is determined by a team of Hillary Clinton historians who are experts on her and incorruptible. This is made public, so every hardcore Hillary Clinton supporter now firmly supports you. Basically, you are now the Octavian to Hillary Clinton's Caesar.

Option B: Trump fires Scott Pruitt as head of the EPA and appoints you to that position.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891240)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:51 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

Can TRUMP remove you if you go left?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891294)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:52 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Trump will have as much control over you as the law and Constitution provide

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891307)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:52 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

There is no way in hell I could keep up the charade required for A. It would be worse than having to publicly adhere to Islam at all times. I would slip up eventually and lose it all.

As for B, I don't see how I would ever get confirmed, but at least it's a hell of a lot easier

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891304)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:53 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Ben Carson got confirmed for HUD

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891311)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:57 PM
Author: crawly bistre spot

yeah but he's a black doctor, bro

point is, A is an absolute no-go, so B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891336)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:09 PM
Author: elite charcoal halford

B.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891389)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:41 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891533)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:46 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892101)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:48 PM
Author: Sienna Native Hairy Legs



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891279)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 9:58 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You gain access to CharlesXII's OKCupid account and his other dating site profiles. You CANNOT change the pictures: they are all real pictures of CharlesXII picked out by him. You CANNOT change the content of his profile, it is all written by CharlesXII. The only thing you can do is message/swipe on girls. You can write anything you want to girls and they will THINK it is coming from CharlesXII. Charles will agree to attend any date you schedule for him. You get $1,000 for every first date you can score for Charles, plus $250 for each subsequent date with the same girl up to 10 dates.

Option B: You get $1,000,000 tax free if any of the following MLB teams win the World Series between now and December 1, 2028: Atlanta Braves, Philadelphia Phillies, Chicago White Sox. (These are all teams that suck right now but might be good in the near future due to prospects they control)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891345)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:59 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan

A is my dream job

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891601)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:47 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892109)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:39 PM
Author: aqua site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891525)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:51 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You must move to New Bedford, Massachusetts for 5 years and live and work there. At the end of 5 years, a panel of experts on New England's economy and culture rank your life in New Bedford on a scale of 1-10, with 10 meaning you lived as best as you possible could have given the constraints of New Bedford. If you score above a 7, you win $10,000,000. After 5 years are up, you are free to move out of New Bedford.

Option B: If you want to, every Sunday you can go to the center of the city you live in and stand for 12 hours with a sandwich board that has an advertisement on each side. Each time you do this, you earn $1,000. You get a 5 minute bathroom break every 2 hours. If you fail to stand for the whole 12 hours you must pay a $75 fine.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891576)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:53 PM
Author: aqua site

Seems like A is the easy choice though maybe there's something I'm missing. Is New bedford a shithole?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891579)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:49 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

Can you give us some idea of the criteria we're being graded on for A?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892121)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:53 PM
Author: aqua site

that would make the hypo way too easy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895560)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:40 PM
Author: Razzmatazz mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891531)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:00 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You receive complimentary round trip economy airfare to Dubai, where you will be given a 100 question test about airport codes. You know, those three letter acronyms for airports. If you score a 100% on this test, you win a card that lets you fly for free in business class on Emirates for the rest of your life. You'll spend 2 days in the UAE: the test takes an hour on Day 1, and the rest of the time you are free to explore with a $75 per diem.

Option B: You will be given 10 Civil War battles. You must put them in order from most casualties to fewest casualties. Once you turn in your answers, the proctor will tell you "you have x battles in the wrong place" and you'll have a chance to change your answers. If you can get a perfect score, you will receive a $175 annual travel credit for the rest of your life, which you can apply only to Uber/Lyft rides, taxis, and public transit fare.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891603)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:09 PM
Author: Razzmatazz mood

Assuming the airport test is reasonable (I.e. All from the top 200 airports or so), Option A. I think I could memorize those if I spent the whole flight over studying.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891642)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:09 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

It's reasonable but challenging.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891646)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:35 PM
Author: irradiated chrome volcanic crater

the payoff for A is better so i'd go for it. come up with some crazy mnemonics or something for the non-intuitive ones. like Rome's is FCO-- good fucking luck!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891748)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:51 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

A even if I lose, a trip to Dubai is cool

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892130)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 10:59 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891599)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:07 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: Pick a figure from Japanese history. Any figure. HBO will produce a critically acclaimed 1 season show about this figure, and it will become incredibly popular among upper middle class whites.

Option B: Pick a figure from Chinese history before 1900. Any figure. The Chinese Communist Party will suddenly turn him into a hero and force every child in China to learn about him/her (or at least an idealized version of him/her) and imitate him/her.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891638)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:52 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

lol B is funny

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892138)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 23rd, 2018 2:54 PM
Author: Cheese-eating Coldplay Fan

almost certainly B. I could really save an entire country from GC decadence with this.

I would probably pick this ALPHA.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zhang_Zongchang

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35901958)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:03 PM
Author: nubile nursing home community account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891620)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 11:50 PM
Author: violet parlor toaster

oh i dint read the ruls, i thoughts these were everybody hypos,not tojustoneprson..............

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891825)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:01 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

no you're doing it right, the giving it to specific poasters thing is just formalism

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891871)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:04 AM
Author: violet parlor toaster

k

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891884)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:19 AM
Author: Hairless pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891955)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:28 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You will write a novel that will be very successful and popular during your lifetime. Just one novel: if you write subsequent novels, you'll probably get them published on account of your reputation, but they will flop with readers and critics. However, after your death, your literary reputation will suffer greatly and you will eventually be held up as an example of terrible writing, evidence that during the 2010's nobody knew what good writing was.

Option B: So it turns out you're incredibly talented at playing the bassoon. With just a few years of practice you become one of the best bassoon players in the entire world. Within 10 years, you are recognized as possibly the best bassoon player of all time. A better bassoon player than you will not be born until the year 2075.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891989)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:54 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892146)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 2:53 AM
Author: Hairless pit

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892685)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:20 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891958)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:38 AM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: You are given 10 small penguins to take care of FOR A YEAR. They're like this: https://www.quarkexpeditions.com/sites/default/files/styles/content-slideshow/public/wildlife/walkthiswaycarcass-island-falklands-3.jpg

One of the penguins is specially trained to spy on drug smuggling. The other nine penguins are talentless decoys. You don't know which one is the trained penguin. Your job is to make sure that the trained penguin survives the whole year, because there are drug cartels trying to kill him. You are given a one-time payment for $100,000 for making security improvements to your house and/or making your house more penguin friendly, plus all your spending on penguin food is reimbursed. If you succeed, you get $3 million as a reward.

Option B: You are given a baby Komodo Dragon. You must take care of it for three years as it grows into a vicious adult. If the dragon is still alive and healthy after three years, you get $1.5 million now plus an extra $200,000 in ten years. You are given $75,000 to cover supplies plus house modifications for the dragon.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892052)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:57 AM
Author: white multi-colored jew abode

[Just saying option A could be made into a hilarious movie]

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892167)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:56 PM
Author: Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center

Option B seems CR: hire a full time Komodo dragon caretaker with experience for $75k per year.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35894010)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:05 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

A is the plot of K-9 starring Jim Belushi

B is the plot of Stranger Things season 2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895643)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:22 AM
Author: obsidian plaza fat ankles

Go back to India motherfucker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35891966)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:14 AM
Author: abnormal bossy half-breed locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35892898)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:14 PM
Author: Painfully honest cruel-hearted senate newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893776)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:44 PM
Author: nubile nursing home community account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893935)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:06 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

hey look it's a subthread with xo's worst posters

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895645)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:11 PM
Author: Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893761)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:32 PM
Author: Underhanded deranged messiness black woman

Option A: As part of a contest, you are given ONE WEEK to visit as many airports as you possibly can. By "visit" we mean either go inside of, land at, or take off from, any one of these will satisfy. The only restriction is that during that one week you can only spend $10,000 on transportation costs. That $10,000 will be reimbursed at the end of the week. If you visit more airports than your competitor, you win $1,000,000. All you know about your competitor is that he or she is a current college student who has been to 11 different countries.

Option B: You are given $500,000 worth of stock in a diverse portfolio of startups headquartered in the Indian cities of Mumbai and Hyderabad. You are not allowed to sell any of this stock for five years.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893874)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:54 PM
Author: Cyan Vigorous Mediation Center

If the companies are publicly traded, then B. Otherwise, A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35893998)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:08 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

A without hesitation. you rent a cheapass car and start driving

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895654)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 12:59 PM
Author: odious walnut turdskin

Option A: You are turned into a highly amorous, HIV-infested monkey. Your owner, the warden of a major South American prison, likes to set you loose on disobedient inmates where you have your way with them at your pleasure. At the end of three years, if the HIV hasn't killed you, you turn back into yourself with $5,000,000.

Option B: Option A but you don't turn back

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35894034)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 1:39 PM
Author: costumed pozpig lettuce



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35894246)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:09 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate

A. HIV would not kill a monkey

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895662)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 1:52 PM
Author: internet-worthy state



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35894307)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 5:54 PM
Author: Effete Misunderstood Preventive Strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895566)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:06 PM
Author: wonderful degenerate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895647)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 22nd, 2018 6:09 PM
Author: greedy house persian



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3955981&forum_id=2#35895666)