She likes bowling and said she'd like to teach me. So I suggested we meet up and go bowling. Sorry I don't know THE RULES for this sort of shit.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935263)

just don't throw a bunch of gutterballs, charles.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944676)

Don’t worry, don’t make a big deal out of it. Most important thing is to not act uptight or self-conscious. Tough at first, but that’s what the practice is for.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935609)

HTH!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935154)

Well done

Remember, chicks dig when you bowl overhand

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935269)

Obviously, the big metric will be whether or not the girl wants a second date. Apart from that, how will he KNOW that he is succeeding and building dating skills?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935530)

Was it kooky?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935621)

Eye contact

Engaging conversation between frames

She smiles a lot

Eye contact

Advice: be calm, it’s ok to be lower energy in the sense that you’re not manic, but flow with the conversation/get to know how she ticks — and don’t be afraid to speak your mind but keep it light when talking about your views. If you hit patches of silence don’t panic, let the silence ride for 5-10 secs before making another line of conversation. As the dude it’s your job to control key moments of the date like that. If she makes a new line of conversation obviously roll with it.

Edit: drink and offer to buy her drinks there, this is crucial

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935997)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOUg956XHpY

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35935577)

The best first date for a fuckin dork (best by chances of a second date, not getting laid) is something that involves walking around, followed by stopping for a drink, something light to eat, ice cream, yogurt, etc. Park, mall, museum, art gallery, whatever.

It works because if two people are naturally shy or awkward, the worst thing you can do is have them stare at each other from across a table right away. Walking around is a much better vibe and there will constantly be new topics of conversation organically arising. Then once the ice is broken for a while you go somewhere else.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35956879)

The earliest known forms of bowling date back to ancient Egypt. Remnants of balls used at the time were found among artifacts in ancient Egypt going back to the Egyptian protodynastic period in 3200 BC. Balls were made using the husks of grains, covered in material such as leather, and bound with string. Other balls made of porcelain have also been found, indicating that these were rolled along the ground rather than thrown due to their size and weight. Some of these resemble the modern day jack used in target bowl games. Bowling games of different forms are also noted by Herodotus as an invention of the Lydians in Asia Minor.

About 2,000 years ago, in the Roman Empire, a similar game evolved between Roman legionaries entailing the tossing of stone objects as close as possible to other stone objects, which eventually evolved into Italian Bocce, or outdoor bowling.

About 400 AD, bowling began in Germany as a religious ritual to cleanse oneself from sin by rolling a rock into a club (kegel) representing the heathen, causing bowlers to be called keglers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35937351)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943392)

What be a normal level of "success" on OKC, in terms of likes/message responses/actual dates?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943623)

you have to keep in mind... women get INUNDATED w messages. i was on okcupid for a few weeks and i got about 50 messages/likes the first day and on average at least a dozen (if not more) per day after that. and im mid 30s, not 'hot', and in a way less populated area than you are.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943634)

some were legit attractive MC to UMC dudes

some were trashy fat proles

i got a pretty wide mix of dudes, really

it was fairly overwhelming to sort through them all and try to figure out who i was actually interested in talking to and who i wasnt interested in. i can only imagine how a 7+ chick in a major metro feels when she receives hundreds of likes or messages a day. ugh, gross.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943692)

You having set up two dates in a short amount of time is perfectly decent.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943659)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943670)

baby steps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35943622)

i've got a friend who in years has NEVER had a date from dating apps. You got 1 in 1 week. Think about that.

But Kramp said you want metrics on how you are doing -- I think that's the wrong mindset. You are viewing this as a board game, not real life. It's okay to let emotions get involved. I'm not sure you should be keeping score, or making spreadsheets about your dates. Especially because women tend, for whatever biological reason, not to be attracted to that persona. They like risk takers, not spreadsheet makers. (I'm coining that, btw.) I'd suggest not having these experiences in such a mechanical sense. I know it's a defense mechanism, but at some point you have to let your defenses down. Or don't. You're smarter than I am. Sometimes that can be a detriment.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944564)

there's a reason corp slave called me a dating whisperer ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944651)

I suppose the only metric is second date, third date etc.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944683)

This is going off tangent, but usually if she likes you, she wants to fuck on the second or third date. Sort of a biological drive to rope you in. One girl, I remember, took 5 or 6 dates, because I think she really liked me, wasn't a whore, biglaw attorney, and didn't realize the extent of my drinking problem.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944720)

a little worried charles will self-sabotage by acting standoffish, but that's part of the learning curve.

i like charles, a lot. he's a great poaster, incredibly talented. weird to care about another poaster's dating life, but i do. he's going to make mistakes. and one can't go through dating trying to avoid mistakes. i've been there.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35944829)

Girls are generally (not always) incapable of understanding humor so laughing for them is just a way of saying "I'm having a good time."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35945347)

Also there's the issue of ball weight. If you're physically weak (not sure if Charles works out) this will be highlighted when you struggle with a reasonably weighted ball. All else equal you don't want to be using a lighter ball than your date. This can be worked around with jokes and a good natured attitude but you also don't want to pick a ball that is too heavy then deny the it's too heavy. Thaats the easy trap to avoid.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3962044&forum_id=2#35945366)