Also, don’t do this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4052741&forum_id=2#36622244)

LJL at paying for a handjob from a slimepit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4052741&forum_id=2#36622256)

stings are rare and to catch the chicks owning the place for not greasing the right people.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4052741&forum_id=2#36622331)

Astor2428

Messages:25

Forward: I lead a charmed life and I don't know why. Things just fall into place for me. They always have. Yet, recently when my newest "forever" relationship collapsed, I (kind of) expected a Walls of Jericho crumbling down scenario. I envisioned myself buried underneath the debris with ambulances and accident investigators taking pictures of the scene - and of course, some art-school drop out drawing a white chalk outline of my body. But, that didn't happen. It never does. I'm like the cat that gets thrown off the ninth story balcony ledge and lands on it's feet unharmed. Oh...don't get me wrong. I am fully aware that something BIG, BAD and decidedly UNMERCIFUL is just waiting to crush me down the road. It's inevitable. To quote Jim Morrison (again) "No One Gets Out of Here Alive" and I won't either. But, whatever it is down that road - it is a long ways off and I intend on having as much fun as I can until then. I know what I like and I'm in it to win it.

The Setup: Late Monday afternoon. I'm sitting at work thinking "Do we really need another film adaptation of Ray Bradbury's 'Fahrenheit 451' ? Wasn't François Truffaut's 1966 film version good enough for everyone ?". Then it happened. Angela, from A&K, texted me with the magic words "Hey Baby. Lisa working today". Yes ! Yes ! Yes ! I am infatuated with Lisa at A&K. But, I thought she only worked there for just one week (and I went everyday that week). Now, my mind shifted rapidly away from "Fahrenheit 451" to something else - or should I say - someone else. I quickly texted back to Angela "Yes !!!! I'll be there in an hour". Okay. Yeah. Sure, I could have been a Jet and played it cool man. But, I'm not Riff or Baby John or Chino. Like I said - I am in it to win it.

The Establishment: I arrived exactly on time and was greeted by Angela with a big smile on her face - almost laughing at me. This was something new for me. In the past, she had only been "professionally polite" to me. I'd always figured that she sees me as just another dude coming through the door. I can't blame her. Yet, over time now, she does know a little bit about me. My first name and (kind of) what I do for a living. Honestly, that still hadn't given her cause to be overly friendly to me. I hadn't really earned it. I'm just another guy. But, just then I realized something - she has me figured out. She knows what and who I like. She has my number down pat. And I don't mind at all.

House/Masseuse Fee: Paid up front. $ 90/hour + $ 170/Masseuse fee. Total $ 260.

My Masseuse: (again) Lisa. Young, Chinese, gorgeous and sweet. Her physical attributes are exactly what I personally like. Great hair, smooth skin, sexy eyes, mouth and ears - and a truly beautiful smile. Plus, she has the body type that drives me crazy. It's a perfect fit for me. She had worked at A&K for a week a couple of weeks ago and I had randomly chosen her from the names that Angela had texted to me. But, luck was on my side (again) because, we hit it off really well. Well enough, like I mentioned previously, that I went back to see her all five days that she was there. The strange thing is that I still don't know anything about her. She's a woman of mystery to me. Sometimes when I look into her eyes, I think she's two or three steps ahead of me. I find that both unnerving and sexy at the same time. I guess that I'm just a thrill freak Uncle Sam. She's clearly well educated and speaks English perfectly. She also has a great sense of humor that I really enjoy. She makes me laugh. She's perfect for me under these conditions.

Table Shower: During this miserable summer, I've actually looked forward to the table showers with Lisa. She's great at it and I like watching her while she soaps me down while she runs water all over her body. And that naked body of hers feels wonderful rubbing on my body. I like it. Hey, I'll even toss in one of these little guys to emphasize it --->>:)

Massage: She's got good skills on the massage table. She makes my body very relaxed - although, I am always "Ready Freddie" as soon as the massage phase has been been completed. Helping things along with the good vibrations massage mood is that she speaks in a sexy voice as she's doing the massage. She says the right things to me. The odd thing is, I don't recall exactly what she has said to me. All I know is that I liked it in the moment. I felt the benefit.

Main Attraction: Massage phase completed, it was time for the enjoyment phase to begin - which started with Lisa giving me a very wonderful BBBJ. She makes great eye contact and I always found it easy to say whatever-passes-for-thoughts-in-my-head while in that position. One time during the past week that she was there I started quoting Oscar Wilde. Yes. Oscar Wilde. Hey, I don't care if it means anything in the setting. I will say practically anything (including confessing to the 1932 Lindbergh baby kidnapping) if, I'm feeling good and Lisa knows how to make me feel good. Then it was time for some 69 action. I was digging the whole experience but, there was still more fun to be had. Applying the rubber cloak, we switched to standing mish. It's the eye contact that I liked during that. She's got beautiful eyes and her little smile as things are going full speed ahead really got me off. Not ready to call it a night (or more precisely - an hour) yet, we switched to some doggie action and it was like driving a really great sports car. And I'm in the driver's seat baby. Get out of the way you fuckin' pedestrians - I'm coming through at a hundred miles an hour ! But, seeing the checkered flag ahead (the wall on the clock ticking away) I wanted to finish back in the mish position grinding away.

Finish: This time was a bit of a first for me - as I hate the rubber cloak and find it hard to unload in it. I find it way too restrictive and I've always viewed myself as more of a "visual artist". But, I did manage to finish up in the cloak in the mish position. It felt good. Maybe I'm missing something by not finishing like that more often ? Wait. Stop. I can't even believe that I wrote that last line. Dial it back G. I have to go with what works for me. Stay true to my code.

Tip: I like to tip so, I gave Lisa an extra $ 200. I get the frugal thing some "mongers" live by but, if the money doesn't hurt me - I don't care what I give. And it doesn't hurt me. As I've said this several times now - I know what I like.

Exit: On the way out, I bid adieu to Angela while (admittedly) sheepishly uttering the words "see you again....tomorrow". Yes. It's true. Like a standup comedian, I'll be appearing there all week. After all, it's just jokes, folks.

Overall Experience: Once again - THE BEST. I'll be seeing Lisa again.

Bonus Observation: The song wedged in my head as I walked down the street after the appointment was The Modern Lovers' song "Pablo Picasso". "Remember the story of Pablo Picasso / He could walk down your street / And girls could not resist his stare / Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole / Not in New York". That song always makes me laugh.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4052741&forum_id=2#36624166)