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In honor of America's veterans, I am giving hypos (Krampusnacht)

none of the hypos will involve being ruled over Hitler or Ka...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
...
Crusty saffron cuckoldry public bath
  11/11/18
A) Amazon begins selling a $200 virtual reality device that ...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A B sounds like an incredible waste of 2 years
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
Well, in B, you COULD go to class while at "HBS" a...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
best two years of your life, actually
spectacular sneaky criminal school cafeteria
  11/12/18
B.
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
A
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
Are the pod people actual HBS students you can network with,...
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
100% AI
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
Do you get a HBS degree in the deal?
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
No.
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
A, solely for the potential experience of seeing horrifying ...
Impressive Weed Whacker
  11/12/18
A and I don't use it much.
Green Motley Location
  11/12/18
B, would definitely end up like Nosferatu in A
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
Tldr
Gaped comical temple ladyboy
  11/12/18
Krampus I was looking for one of your hypos the other day. I...
Curious Onyx Juggernaut
  11/11/18
I believe that was a shadowpoasting hypo
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A) You are employed as an "Emergency Restaurant Critic&...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A is my dream job
Hyperventilating pistol native
  11/11/18
B if I can do other shit on my laptop during the meeting
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
B. Much more flexible. Sounds as though one could attend as ...
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
With B you'd get paid $70k vs $60k for the same two weeks of...
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
location is randomly chosen. basically, each morning you...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
A
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
B
Green Motley Location
  11/12/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
both of these sound fucking terrible
unhinged den
  11/14/18
...
charismatic stubborn spot affirmative action
  11/11/18
A) You are asked to be the human face of a fiction-writing a...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A obviously
charismatic stubborn spot affirmative action
  11/11/18
...
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
A in a landslide
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
A, provided that I do not die at the hands of goons if my re...
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
B but I wouldn’t even try for the money
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
A
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
...
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
A) God agrees to cleanse ONE city of your choice of all the ...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A!! It's not even close. I choose New York. However, that's ...
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
B sounds awesome I become the new God-King of Denmark!
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
B
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
time to move to BOTSWANA and wait for everyone to convert to...
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
...
excitant khaki filthpig plaza
  11/11/18
A) The CIA offers to give you plastic surgery to make you lo...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
If it was me 5 years ago, A easy b/c I was fat & could'v...
excitant khaki filthpig plaza
  11/11/18
the CIA will take care of your resemblance to KJU. They'll h...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
B would be fuckin easy and fun.
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
describe your gameplan
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
- Attend every possible traditional catholic church function...
Henna Vibrant National
  11/12/18
what about the fact that Charles can't really go to a lot of...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
You go all-in and let Charles's career go down in flames so ...
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
cold as ice
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
(Guy who will ensure CharlesVII's genes live on)
Adventurous Market Trust Fund
  11/12/18
CR 24/7 looksmax no sleep nigga
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
B
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
A, provided they are obligated to use plastic surgery or wha...
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
Nope
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A I already look like KJU
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
Can I win a Ferrari that is not brand new?
unhinged den
  11/14/18
how are u so good at this
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/11/18
A) You are dropped off at a MENSA meeting in suburban Kansas...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
...
garnet people who are hurt step-uncle's house
  11/11/18
oh yeah? https://www.richardcarrier.info/
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
B.
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
A. Easy money.
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
A, there are some great restaurants in Overland Park
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/12/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
A
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
...
Aphrodisiac hideous corner
  11/11/18
A) You get to change ONE word in the title of a classic nove...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
B
Aphrodisiac hideous corner
  11/11/18
...
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
B
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
B and this is the least close so far.
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
A to change it back to berenstein bears.
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
...
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/12/18
...
Adventurous Market Trust Fund
  11/12/18
B
slimy theatre
  11/11/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
...
Coiffed black liquid oxygen
  11/11/18
A) For the next 5 years, you become a global fashion icon. W...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A
Coiffed black liquid oxygen
  11/11/18
A and retire to my private island compound funded by my famo...
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
A
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
B and I’d kill self after year 6
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
A
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
...
slimy theatre
  11/11/18
A) You are the Overseer of Artisans on a tomb for one of the...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
B, who cares what people think when I’m gone
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/11/18
Egyptians were obsessed with that
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
B. Also not close.
Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend
  11/11/18
B
slimy theatre
  11/11/18
B
magical hissy fit forum
  11/11/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
Excellent hypos, Krampusnacht is gifted at this.
Henna Vibrant National
  11/11/18
Wish more ppl would reply
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
the replies are not the point
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/14/18
...
Hyperventilating pistol native
  11/11/18
A) The LUTE (as in, the musical instrument depicted in https...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A! I love that LUTE.
Impressive Weed Whacker
  11/12/18
(https://www.1st-art-gallery.com/thumbnail/130000/130199/pai...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
B sounds hilarious
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
...
gold geriatric space tank
  11/11/18
A) College Football ditches its current 4-team playoff and r...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A for sure. By weeks 6-8 of the current format, only a handf...
Impressive Weed Whacker
  11/12/18
A is my dream
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
(Mike Leach) https://www.sbnation.com/college-football/20...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
...
beady-eyed salmon french chef
  11/11/18
A) Kemetism, i.e. a reconstructed version of the Egyptian pa...
Irradiated alpha
  11/11/18
A, a million times over. Egyptian paganism probably comes...
beady-eyed salmon french chef
  11/12/18
Immediate travel ban on Libyans, Asiatics, and Nubians for s...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
Ironically, we'd probably ban the fuck out of Syrian refugee...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
A and its the easiest choice in this thread
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
...
Cream Demanding Rigor Heaven
  11/11/18
A) You gain a supernatural ability to perform the role of Po...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
A without a doubt
Cream Demanding Rigor Heaven
  11/12/18
A
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
A
Green Motley Location
  11/12/18
...
Mildly Autistic Filthy Dilemma
  11/11/18
A) The winner of Megapoaster Madness gets a professorship at...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
B, ive at least got a chance at that
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
I'd give up $250 to make a leading xo poaster a professor.
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
I guess A) just for the laughs.
Mildly Autistic Filthy Dilemma
  11/13/18
...
Sapphire Persian House
  11/11/18
A) Competitive burrito eating becomes an important dispute r...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
B
Green Motley Location
  11/12/18
A, cuts down on violence at its source
Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike
  11/13/18
A
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
laughed out loud at A
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/14/18
...
concupiscible address really tough guy
  11/11/18
A) Science creates a new, very cheap, very effective birth c...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
B
Green Motley Location
  11/12/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
Thank you for supporting our veterans via the joy of hypos.
Adventurous Market Trust Fund
  11/12/18
A) Companies are willing to pay big money to bald men to pai...
Irradiated alpha
  11/12/18
Virtue through order. B is preferable to the society of the...
Adventurous Market Trust Fund
  11/12/18
...
unholy toaster rehab
  11/12/18
...
beady-eyed salmon french chef
  11/12/18
A because it would be hilarious to see.
Green Motley Location
  11/13/18
A for comedy value, B already exists in N. Korea and that do...
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/13/18
B, i hate spending money on haircuts
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
...
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/12/18
A) Pick a country, any country. You now have an encyclopedic...
Irradiated alpha
  11/13/18
B, though I'm not sure what language I'd pick.
beady-eyed salmon french chef
  11/13/18
B immediately Tossing up between Mandarin (Taiwan style, ca...
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/13/18
you can pick Taiwan but you have to call it "Chinese Ta...
Irradiated alpha
  11/13/18
I'll call it SPANKMYASSANDCALLMEDOOBSISTAN Republic or whate...
Azure racy ticket booth
  11/13/18
yeah Taiwan is a really nice place, but we have to be carefu...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
B
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
B so I don't have to go through the trouble of learning my m...
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
...
Nofapping Center
  11/12/18
A) The "Lumberjill" aesthetic becomes extremely po...
Irradiated alpha
  11/13/18
B, even though domesticated owls is a reuse from your Slider...
Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike
  11/13/18
A, fuck Harry Potter
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
A sounds extremely hot tbh
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/14/18
180 hypos
Coiffed black liquid oxygen
  11/13/18
A) Beanie Babies, the original 90's ones, become very popula...
Irradiated alpha
  11/13/18
If A, does XO have a giant Beanie Baby craze that results in...
beady-eyed salmon french chef
  11/14/18
seems highly likely, yeah
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
B, ive always wanted to visit Kyrgyzstan anyway
provocative tanning salon queen of the night
  11/14/18
...
boyish chapel
  11/13/18
A) 10 years after their first admission to the bar, every la...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
A is the humane choice
boyish chapel
  11/14/18
...
Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike
  11/13/18
A) You get 20 free nights at any Hyatt property each year. H...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
re A, what if you talk like that irl
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/14/18
then I guess it's just 20 free nights for you
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
180
yellow half-breed gaping
  11/14/18
A sounds like a legitimate ad campaign I heard about once
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
A, no question
boyish chapel
  11/14/18
...
concupiscible address really tough guy
  11/14/18
A) $2,000,000 tax free, but every time you pass by a place t...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
B
concupiscible address really tough guy
  11/14/18
A and move to Europe, lol
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
...
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
A) Once a day, you can repeat the word "nachos" a ...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18
B, and go to work with my uncle as a coke distributor. the h...
flesh friendly grandma nibblets
  11/14/18
...
Irradiated alpha
  11/14/18


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:39 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

none of the hypos will involve being ruled over Hitler or Kaiser Bill

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209768)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210410)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:02 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211108)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:43 PM
Author: Crusty saffron cuckoldry public bath



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209789)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:58 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Amazon begins selling a $200 virtual reality device that lets you experience the 1990's. It has three modes: kid mode, where you experience the life of a little kid, adult mode, where you experience the life of a Gen-X yuppie, and MLB mode, where you experience the life of 1990's Jim Thome. The catch is that if you use the VR device too much, it begins to deform your body. People who use the device on a daily basis begin to have elongated hands and fingers, pointy ears, and start losing all of their hair. Absolute addicts eventually come to resemble the vampire from Nosferatu. Using the 90's VR Machine too much is seen as socially unprestigious, kind of like how being a porn addict is seen today.

B) There's a pod that lets you experience Harvard Business School as described by JJC. Best two years of your life, plans to party wherever you want, fucking like rabbits, etc. The catch is, you must do this for the full two years and you must do it in real time. They lock you into this pod, you "go to HBS", and you emerge from the pod two years later with long hair and fingernails, having aged 2 years and without any knowledge of what is happening IRL during that time. You do, however, retain all of the memories of the prestigious people you met, BU undergrads you fucked, and classes you chose to attend during your 2 years at "HBS".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209874)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:45 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

A

B sounds like an incredible waste of 2 years

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211694)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 8:32 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Well, in B, you COULD go to class while at "HBS" and you'd remember shit from class that could make you a better office worker. You just wouldn't have the credentials to prove it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37214664)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 11:46 AM
Author: spectacular sneaky criminal school cafeteria

best two years of your life, actually

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215818)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:55 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

B.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211763)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:12 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212604)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:10 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab

Are the pod people actual HBS students you can network with, other pod users, or merely simulated AI? I assume they're all AI because that's the only way (B) would play out as planned.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215965)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:11 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

100% AI

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215969)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:23 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab

Do you get a HBS degree in the deal?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216049)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:23 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

No.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216056)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: Impressive Weed Whacker

A, solely for the potential experience of seeing horrifying vampire people at the mall while eating Sweet Factory gummies before heading to the movie theater to play Super Shot Basketball with some buds.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216199)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:49 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

A and I don't use it much.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216228)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:51 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B, would definitely end up like Nosferatu in A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216245)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:24 PM
Author: Gaped comical temple ladyboy

Tldr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216506)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:49 PM
Author: Curious Onyx Juggernaut

Krampus I was looking for one of your hypos the other day. It was about controlling the minds of Seattle Seahawks fans. Can you link it for me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209808)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:53 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

I believe that was a shadowpoasting hypo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209838)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:04 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You are employed as an "Emergency Restaurant Critic" - that is, you are paid a flat $60,000 per year and can live wherever you want, but about twice a week you get a text message saying that a restaurant critic in some US city has fallen ill, and you have 24 hours to get to that city and review some restaurant. Of course, all travel and food expenses are fully reimbursed when you are on one of those emergency trips. 2 weeks vacation time each year during which you are safe from these texts.

B) Similar concept, except you are an "Emergency Suit" - that is, you are paid to fly to some city and wear a suit during the meeting. The company paying you to do this is going to pretend that you are a board member, an executive, a consultant, something like that. You don't need to talk, you just need to sit there in a suit. There is at least one opportunity per day, anywhere in the United States, and it pays $700 per each meeting you attend. All travel is reimbursed of course, as is dry cleaning and tailoring.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209928)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:28 PM
Author: Hyperventilating pistol native

A is my dream job

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211618)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:46 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B if I can do other shit on my laptop during the meeting

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211705)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:59 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

B. Much more flexible. Sounds as though one could attend as many meets each year as one desires.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211789)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:16 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab

With B you'd get paid $70k vs $60k for the same two weeks of work, get to pick your workdays, and not have to write bullshit reviews. Plus the option to make 6 figures if you want to work more. Also, it's not clear if the engagement per day anywhere in the US means you can pick anywhere to do this, or if the location is randomly chosen, but that ambiguity gives it even more upside.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216004)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:17 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

location is randomly chosen.

basically, each morning you'll get a text message like "come to [random city] tomorrow at 3 PM for a meeting at [address] ask for Seth"

I mean it's more likely to be a big city, but some days it might be Akron

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216013)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:12 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212606)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:50 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216234)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:53 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216256)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:41 AM
Author: unhinged den

both of these sound fucking terrible

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230332)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:49 PM
Author: charismatic stubborn spot affirmative action



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209809)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:13 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You are asked to be the human face of a fiction-writing algorithm. The algorithm is capable of writing critically-acclaimed literature that stands the test of time. What you are asked to do is to live the public life of a "tortured genius", details of how you choose to do so are up to you, and then the algorithm's books are published under your name. You are paid $1,000,000 per year to keep up this charade, plus free services from a fashion and image consultant. If you reveal that you are not actually the author of these books, you will be hunted down and killed by goons. If the people behind the algorithm reveal that you are not actually the author, they will pay you a one-time indemnity of $50,000,000 (and annual payments will cease). If a third party figures it out, your annual payments are cut off and you are thrown to the curb.

B) It turns out vampires are real. They're just really good at disguising themselves from humans. Each year, vampires murder tens of thousands of humans and use hypnosis to fool other humans into thinking those victims died of "natural causes". You gain the power to see vampires. If you can go twenty years without telling another human being that vampires exist or that you can see them, you are awarded $75,000,000 tax free. If you blab before then, you get nothing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209975)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:23 PM
Author: charismatic stubborn spot affirmative action

A obviously

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210032)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:11 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211181)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:48 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

A in a landslide

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211713)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:59 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

A, provided that I do not die at the hands of goons if my revelation is not made under duress or torture.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211785)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:13 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

B but I wouldn’t even try for the money

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212610)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:54 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216263)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:54 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209841)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:21 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) God agrees to cleanse ONE city of your choice of all the unrepentant sinners who dwell there. For purposes of this hypo, an unrepentant sinner is defined as anyone who regularly commits a sin in the traditional Christian conception of sin, AND shows no repentance of this sin. Simply feeling bad about your sin internally is sufficient repentance, the sinner need not actually seek forgiveness from God to avoid being cleansed. By city, we mean the actual city limits, not MSA or other such measure.

B) You get to make up a new religion. You pick what it believes, what it prohibits, what moral code its adherents must live by. And then you can pick ONE country with a population under 15 million, and a majority of that country's population will convert to your new religion. From there, it must grow through conversion or conquest if it is to get any bigger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210018)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:08 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National

A!! It's not even close. I choose New York. However, that's a highly unbiblical definition of "repentance".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211155)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:49 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B sounds awesome

I become the new God-King of Denmark!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211725)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:13 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212611)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:55 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216271)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:32 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

time to move to BOTSWANA and wait for everyone to convert to WHITE SHARIA

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230270)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 1:55 PM
Author: excitant khaki filthpig plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209848)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:31 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) The CIA offers to give you plastic surgery to make you look exactly like Kim Jong Un. In exchange, you will live in a highly classified government location (think Area 51 or similar) and spend hours each day posing for embarrassing photos. These photos will be distributed by CIA operatives inside North Korea in an attempt to decrease respect for Kim Jong Un. During the hours that you are NOT posing for embarrassing photos as Kim Jong Un, you will be waited on hand and foot in your private apartments, allowed to eat the most delicious foods, have access to beautiful women paid by the CIA to provide you with companionship, and be able to play any video game you want. You will also be paid $100,000 per month. However, should Kim Jong Un ever lose power, the CIA will kick you out. They'll no longer need you and you'll be on your own.

B) You get to take 2 months off work, during which time you will control CharlesXII. You can make him say whatever you want him to say, do whatever you want him to do. You cannot change basic shit like his appearance or the way his voice sounds, though. Your goal is get to him a SECOND DATE with a devout Catholic girl during these 2 months. If you succeed, you win a brand new Ferrari of your choice. If you fail, you are stuck as CharlesXII forever.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210075)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:34 PM
Author: excitant khaki filthpig plaza

If it was me 5 years ago, A easy b/c I was fat & could've easily looked like KJU

Now, I'll do B. I think I can get to 2nd DATE in 2 months

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210088)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:39 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

the CIA will take care of your resemblance to KJU. They'll have the best people working on you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210123)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:12 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National

B would be fuckin easy and fun.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211191)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:12 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

describe your gameplan

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211193)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 10:00 AM
Author: Henna Vibrant National

- Attend every possible traditional catholic church function.

- Attend any Christian conferences I can in that time.

- Join an IRL activities group like https://www.eventsandadventures.com/ and attend as many functions as possible.

- Put up a profile on every online dating site/app (with a focus on Christian/Catholic ones), in which I clearly state who/what I'm looking for in a relationship.

- Hit the gym like Mike Tyson with a heavy bag.

- Ask worthwhile women out without any fear of rejection.

I really think it's as simple as changing the way he talks to women, and maybe changing where he's looking. The modifications I'd make when talking to women (from what I suspect is the approach he takes) are:

- Modulate myself some when talking to women, and do a lot more listening than talking.

- Always be authoritative when I talk, and be dismissive of shit tests without being too rude.

- Don't get bogged down in discussing my interests unless she's obviously really into it - instead get her talking about hers and ask her probing questions.

- Maintain a level of emotional detachment, and keep the mentality that I don't give a shit about these women until they start indicating interest (KEY to avoiding desperation).

- Be more than willing to confront other men if they do something I think merits it, but never let them make me appear small/whiny.

- Tease and flirt with women effectively.

If all else fails with two weeks left, I'd join any local singles group. Women there are always so desperate you can see it dripping off of them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215112)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 10:56 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

what about the fact that Charles can't really go to a lot of social activities because he works nights

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215487)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:22 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab

You go all-in and let Charles's career go down in flames so you can cop dat sweet Ferrari. You just have to get the second date per the hypo, doesn't say anything about keeping his life in order.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216045)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:26 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

cold as ice

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216074)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: Adventurous Market Trust Fund

(Guy who will ensure CharlesVII's genes live on)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216198)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:33 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

CR

24/7 looksmax no sleep nigga

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230278)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:50 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211736)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:04 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

A, provided they are obligated to use plastic surgery or whatever to change my looks from KJU.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211808)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:52 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Nope

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212073)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:16 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

A I already look like KJU

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212630)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:56 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216280)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:45 AM
Author: unhinged den

Can I win a Ferrari that is not brand new?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230361)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:12 PM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

how are u so good at this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37209972)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:38 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You are dropped off at a MENSA meeting in suburban Kansas City, MO. Your job is to convince everyone at that meeting that IFNB is real. For each person you convince, you are given $25,000. (Of course, we all know that IFNB is real, but MENSA dorks don't)

B) Same thing, except you are hanging out with :D and his poker buddies who are all big Richard Carrier fans. And you need to convince as many of them as you can of the existence of the historical Jesus. Same prize, $25,000 per poker buddy who acknowledges that the historical Jesus is more likely than not to have existed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210118)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:04 PM
Author: garnet people who are hurt step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211118)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:05 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

oh yeah?

https://www.richardcarrier.info/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211127)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:04 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

B.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211811)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:13 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

A. Easy money.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212613)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 10:01 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

A, there are some great restaurants in Overland Park

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215118)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:57 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216288)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:34 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230281)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:23 PM
Author: Aphrodisiac hideous corner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210033)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:42 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You get to change ONE word in the title of a classic novel. The universe is retconned so that it was always called that. This is the same hypo that somebody in the last 10 years accepted to change the name of those cartoon bears.

B) The names of ALL new Hollywood films are submitted to you for approval. You can change the names to whatever you like. However, if 90% of the people working on a movie disapprove of your changed title, you are overriden and the original title sticks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210148)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:46 PM
Author: Aphrodisiac hideous corner

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210183)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:10 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211166)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:51 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211742)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:06 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

B and this is the least close so far.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211814)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:14 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

A to change it back to berenstein bears.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212617)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 10:58 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215506)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:46 PM
Author: Adventurous Market Trust Fund



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216208)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:22 PM
Author: slimy theatre

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212667)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:58 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216295)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:29 PM
Author: Coiffed black liquid oxygen



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210061)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 2:54 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) For the next 5 years, you become a global fashion icon. Whatever you wear, other people will wear. If you wear a cape, people will start wearing cape. If you decide to bring jorts back, jorts will be back. But at the conclusion of 5 years, people will realize you were flame. Your name will become a byword for "bad fashion" and the fact that you were once a fashion god will be treated as a joke.

B) You are given a potion. At any point, if you drink the potion, you will become extremely charismatic, capable of convincing millions of people to follow you simply by speaking to them. This effect will last for exactly six years from the day you drink the potion. After six years, you return to your current level of charisma...but then you start to LOSE charisma rapidly after that. Within 8 years of drinking the potion, you will not only be totally uncharismatic, you will begin to look hideous and grotesque.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210234)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 3:19 PM
Author: Coiffed black liquid oxygen

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210421)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:52 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

A and retire to my private island compound funded by my famous period

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211752)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:07 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211822)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:15 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

B and I’d kill self after year 6

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212623)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:58 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216299)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: slimy theatre



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37210413)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:35 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You are the Overseer of Artisans on a tomb for one of the famous and powerful Pharaohs of Ancient Egypt's New Kingdom. You oversee all the people who decorate and paint the Pharaoh's tomb. The Pharaoh personally gets briefings from you on the progress of his tomb; but in all matters you must obey the Pharaoh and cater to his every whim. Your name is mentioned in court records that will be discovered by historians, and your own tomb is one day discovered by archaeologists. All in all, in 2018 a thousand or so trained Egyptologists will be reasonably familiar with your name and what you did in life.

B) You are the Nomarch (regional governor) of an obscure part of Middle Egypt during one of the unstable Intermediate Periods of Ancient Egyptian history. During your lifetime, the Pharaoh is weak and hundreds of miles away and never really exercises much power over your region. For the 20,000 or so people you govern, you might as well be a living god and you have near-absolute power over them. However, when you die you are quickly forgotten.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211341)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:53 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B, who cares what people think when I’m gone

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211759)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:31 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Egyptians were obsessed with that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212727)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:08 PM
Author: Bateful Buck-toothed Stock Car Legend

B. Also not close.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211827)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:15 PM
Author: slimy theatre

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211872)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:12 PM
Author: magical hissy fit forum

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212603)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:59 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216303)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 5:13 PM
Author: Henna Vibrant National

Excellent hypos, Krampusnacht is gifted at this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211196)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:24 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Wish more ppl would reply

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211609)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:26 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

the replies are not the point

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230237)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:26 PM
Author: Hyperventilating pistol native



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211613)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 10:18 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) The LUTE (as in, the musical instrument depicted in https://s.yimg.com/aah/artsheaven/buffoon-playing-a-lute-25.jpg) becomes trendy again. Millions of Americans buy a lute, and they walk around strumming their lutes while singing troubadour songs, often in badly pronounced medieval French. Lutes are also featured in popular music. Even Drake releases a track where he is rapping over lutes playing. The fad lasts about 1.5 years before abating.

B) The newest fad among the "Lean In" crowd (i.e., career-focused women) becomes studying the Sengoku or Waring States Period of Japanese history, drawing insight about business and work-life balance from the actions and writings of prominent medieval war lords of Japan. Pretty soon, America is filled with pants suit wearing women who are opining on the Battle of Sekigahara or the Honno-Ji Incident, often at a superficial level. Meanwhile, on the internet, incels get extremely angry at this because THEY were into Japanese history first. SJW magazines publish article after article accusing incels of trying to be GATEKEEPERS of Sengoku Japan.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37213005)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:23 PM
Author: Impressive Weed Whacker

A! I love that LUTE.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216059)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:27 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

(https://www.1st-art-gallery.com/thumbnail/130000/130199/painting_page_800x/Cariani/The-Lute-Player.jpg?ts=1505655060)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216080)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:00 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B sounds hilarious

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216308)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 6:31 PM
Author: gold geriatric space tank



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211629)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 10:24 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) College Football ditches its current 4-team playoff and replaces it with a 64 team tournament. The last 4 weeks of the season are eliminated, every team is seeded, and each week half the teams are eliminated until there is ONE TRUE CHAMPION. The result is that regular season wins/losses are a lot less relevant. Basically you have to keep a winning record to make the 64 game tournament.

B) After Roger Goodell dies suddenly without leaving an heir, the NFL decentralizes and becomes a lot more like college football. All teams play each division rival twice (still), but the rest of the schedule is determined by negotiations and agreements between the teams. Teams are also allowed to schedule games against college or CFL teams during the weeks when they are not playing a division rival. There is no postseason anymore, but there are a half dozen or so "Bowl Games" where select division champs play each other. The teams that play in the bowl games are determined by a mix of merit and bias: the bowls are biased towards historically good divisions like the NFC North even in years when those teams are bad. After the Bowl Games are over (and they each attract Superbowl-like attention) the AP votes on a champion.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37213066)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:28 PM
Author: Impressive Weed Whacker

A for sure. By weeks 6-8 of the current format, only a handful of teams are even competing for a playoff spot, which makes all of the other games (excluding your alma mater) much less interesting. Now you keep that hoap alive.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216091)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:00 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A is my dream

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216310)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:03 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

(Mike Leach)

https://www.sbnation.com/college-football/2017/10/12/16464534/mike-leach-64-team-playoff

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216332)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:06 PM
Author: beady-eyed salmon french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211817)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 10:30 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Kemetism, i.e. a reconstructed version of the Egyptian pagan religion, becomes the most popular religious belief among the American ruling elite. The result is a government that models itself on Ancient Egypt, with a major focus on infrastructure and public works projects. Millions of unemployed or underemployed Americans are put to work building roads and bridges (inscribed with cartouches containing the name of America's leaders) and, yes, pyramids and obelisks too. All religions are tolerated among the public, but to have any high-level government position you must make sacrifices to the Ancient Egyptian gods.

B) President-for-Life Hillary Clinton. America is controlled with an iron fist by moderate Democrats who pursue neoliberal policies with a thin veneer of SJWism. The hardcore Bernie Bros and DSA's are mostly held at bay and suppressed (as are Trumpmos obviously) and policies such as token nominations of minorities to high office are used in place of substantive social change or redistribution.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37213102)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:00 PM
Author: beady-eyed salmon french chef

A, a million times over.

Egyptian paganism probably comes the closest to conventional modern morality of all the pre-Christian pagan beliefs, so it wouldn’t make things too weird. We’d probably fix immigration as an issue due to Egyptian paganism’s heavy nationalism, but on the downside we may fight lots of petty foreign wars.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215903)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:09 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Immediate travel ban on Libyans, Asiatics, and Nubians for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215959)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:38 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

Ironically, we'd probably ban the fuck out of Syrian refugees, but accept a lot more Somalians (because of traditional warm relations with the Land of Punt)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216150)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:01 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A and its the easiest choice in this thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 7:17 PM
Author: Cream Demanding Rigor Heaven



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37211885)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 11:03 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You gain a supernatural ability to perform the role of Polonius in Shakespeare's "Hamlet" - anyone who watches you read the part or perform it on stage is immediately enraptured. You're good enough that if you decided to make a career of it, you have a real chance of going down as the best Polonius in history. Unfortunately, you gain no additional talent at playing any other part on stage. That is, if you decide to play Falstaff or Hamlet or some other part that isn't Polonius, you're as good at it as you happen to be right now.

B) Two witches come up to you, a good witch and a bad witch. The good witch says "you shall be the best LSAT tutor of all time. Any kid you tutor for the LSAT will score a 174 or above". The bad witch then says "all of the kids you tutor for the LSAT will be cursed. None of them will get a good job at OCI".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37215552)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:48 PM
Author: Cream Demanding Rigor Heaven

A without a doubt

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216224)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:01 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216323)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:33 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216595)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 9:21 PM
Author: Mildly Autistic Filthy Dilemma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37212662)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:38 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) The winner of Megapoaster Madness gets a professorship at Liberty University for ONE YEAR in the department of their choice plus a syndicated column from the Gannett Company (owners of USA Today and many local papers). Also, since Megapoaster Madness now has a big prize, the results are audited by PwC to ensure that alts are not voting.

B) Everyone who makes the Final Four in megapoaster madness receives a $250 gift certificate to Red Lobster

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216145)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:02 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B, ive at least got a chance at that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216324)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 2:15 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab

I'd give up $250 to make a leading xo poaster a professor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216940)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 1:26 PM
Author: Mildly Autistic Filthy Dilemma

I guess A) just for the laughs.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37224061)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 10:26 PM
Author: Sapphire Persian House



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37213076)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:14 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Competitive burrito eating becomes an important dispute resolution system in the United States. When two people have a disagreement, they will go down to the local Mexican restaurant, order two of the largest burrito they sell, and see who can finish their burrito first. That person is considered the winner and to be in the right. This system significantly cuts down on violence in the United States. Sometimes, multi-million dollar lawsuits are even settled by each side selecting one of its employees or representatives to see who can eat a burrito faster.

B) Taco Tuesday becomes a government welfare program. Every Tuesday, poor people line up at their local taco-serving restaurant, food truck, or push cart and get a free taco. The government then reimburses the taco provider for each taco they give out.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216427)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:32 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216586)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:21 PM
Author: Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike

A, cuts down on violence at its source

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228199)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:12 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229070)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:24 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

laughed out loud at A

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230232)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2018 10:30 PM
Author: concupiscible address really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37213109)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:26 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Science creates a new, very cheap, very effective birth control pill for women that quickly comes to dominate the market. It has only one side effect: heterosexual women who take it become extremely attracted to a man who is capable of memorizing large chunks of text. Like, a guy who can memorize an entire movie, or who can recite the Iliad from memory.

B) Science creates a new, very cheap, and very effective birth control pill for men. You take the pill, and you are incapable of impregnating a woman. If you stop taking it, you regain your fertility within a week. The only side effect is that while you are on the pill you get constant flashbacks of the first girl you ever liked.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216524)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:32 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216581)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:13 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229071)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:51 PM
Author: Adventurous Market Trust Fund

Thank you for supporting our veterans via the joy of hypos.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216237)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:35 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Companies are willing to pay big money to bald men to paint corporate logos onto their heads. Men with shaved heads can get in on this market, but top dollar goes to naturally bald men because the companies that pay for this don't like the risk that a dude can simply grow his hair back to cover up the logo.

B) The government strictly regulates haircuts. For each kind of hair (curly, thin, thick, african, etc.) the government only allows 5 approved haircuts. Of these haircuits, 4 are very short and traditional, and the 5th is an officially sanctioned "rebellious" hairstyle. On the flip side, all haircuts are provided free of charge by the government.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216618)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 1:59 PM
Author: Adventurous Market Trust Fund

Virtue through order. B is preferable to the society of the spectacle that is A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216841)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 2:17 PM
Author: unholy toaster rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216958)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 3:21 PM
Author: beady-eyed salmon french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37217422)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 2:41 PM
Author: Green Motley Location

A because it would be hilarious to see.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37224556)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 10:55 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

A for comedy value, B already exists in N. Korea and that doesn't sound like too much fun

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228001)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:14 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B, i hate spending money on haircuts

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229072)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 12:51 PM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37216238)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 8:20 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Pick a country, any country. You now have an encyclopedic knowledge of the history, culture, laws, and art of that country. However, you do not gain any proficiency in that country's language - if you didn't know the language before, you still don't know it now.

B) Pick a country, any country. You now have full fluency in that country's major language*.

* for African countries that speak a colonizer's language like French or English, you have the option of becoming fluent in that country's largest NATIVE language

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37226840)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 8:31 PM
Author: beady-eyed salmon french chef

B, though I'm not sure what language I'd pick.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37226922)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 10:53 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

B immediately

Tossing up between Mandarin (Taiwan style, can I pick Taiwan as a country?) or Arabic (I pick Jordan, apparently that has a dialect close enough to standard Arabic with a pleasant enough accent), although Japanese or Hindi would be pretty cool too

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37227988)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 10:56 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

you can pick Taiwan but you have to call it "Chinese Taipei"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228011)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:26 PM
Author: Azure racy ticket booth

I'll call it SPANKMYASSANDCALLMEDOOBSISTAN Republic or whatever if I can go hang out there (very pleasant) rather than China (very unpleasant)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228237)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 7:12 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

yeah Taiwan is a really nice place, but we have to be careful because China is very powerful and cares an awful lot about making sure that people don't recognize Taiwan as independent

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229348)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 12:13 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228508)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:41 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

B so I don't have to go through the trouble of learning my mother's (fucking impossible) language before leaving US

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230336)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 12th, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: Nofapping Center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37217464)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:07 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) The "Lumberjill" aesthetic becomes extremely popular among feminists. Women begin to dress up as female lumberjacks, with flannel and all, and view this as a symbol of resistance and empowerment. They also begin eating flapjacks, because this is associated with lumberjacks. Girl power trips to the Pacific Northwest become trendy as well.

B) Scientists develop a pet owl that is as docile and friendly as a dog or cat. This pet owl is marketed to millennials who still love Harry Potter and have always dreamed of a pet owl. Millions of millennials go out and buy pet owls so that they can be like their hero Harry Potter, and now lots of people are walking down the street with owls. It also creates a boom in Harry Potter related paraphernalia, like wands and stuff.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228095)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:23 PM
Author: Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike

B, even though domesticated owls is a reuse from your Sliders/alternate timelines ratings thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228216)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:15 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

A, fuck Harry Potter

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229074)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:23 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

A sounds extremely hot tbh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230227)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 10:44 PM
Author: Coiffed black liquid oxygen

180 hypos

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37227933)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:12 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Beanie Babies, the original 90's ones, become very popular and trendy in China. Suddenly, Chinese nationals are willing to pay enormous sums for original Beanie Babies from the 90's that are still in good condition.

B) A TV show about American biglawyers becomes a huge hit in Kyrgyzstan. Suddenly, the entire nation of Kyrgyzstan becomes obsessed with the high powered lives of America's top corporate attorneys. When American lawyers visit Kyrgyzstan, they become instant celebrities and people ask to have their photos taken with them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228132)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:10 AM
Author: beady-eyed salmon french chef

If A, does XO have a giant Beanie Baby craze that results in financial ruin for many poasters when the bubble bursts?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229067)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 7:11 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

seems highly likely, yeah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229346)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 3:16 AM
Author: provocative tanning salon queen of the night

B, ive always wanted to visit Kyrgyzstan anyway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37229076)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:22 PM
Author: boyish chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228205)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:21 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) 10 years after their first admission to the bar, every lawyer is given the option of participating in a festival of ritual warfare. Lawyers who choose to participate are sent to Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas, where for a month they live in a luxury suite and have their physical and emotional needs tended to by beautiful men or women (their choice). Then, at the end of the month, they are put in an arena with another lawyer of similar school tier and practice area and must fight to the death using swords or spears. The lawyers who die are given a magnificent funeral. The lawyers who survive are given land in the rural west.

B) Once a year, every state bar association holds a singing contest, and there is one winner per state. It is considered prestigious by law firms to have one of their lawyers win this award, so law firms spend money on singing lessons for attorneys who show potential. The state winners all compete in a national contest too. Each state winner receives up to $250,000 in loan forgiveness. The national winner receives $500,000 cash and is typically given a year-long sabbatical by their firm so they can sing at important ABA events.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230215)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 1:11 PM
Author: boyish chapel

A is the humane choice

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37231176)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2018 11:25 PM
Author: Shivering Aromatic Preventive Strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228223)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:28 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) You get 20 free nights at any Hyatt property each year. However, to take advantage of this, you must check into the hotel by standing in the middle of the lobby and saying, loudly, in your best fake southern accent, "Well gee, I'm just a simple country boy and I don't know nothing about no hospitality industry rankings, but this sure seems like a mighty fine hotel!" You must repeat this once a night for the length of your stay.

B) You get 2 free nights at any Hyatt property each year, plus a $500 gift certificate that can be used at any restaurant that is part of a Hyatt property. No gimmicks or strings.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230247)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:30 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

re A, what if you talk like that irl

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230258)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:30 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

then I guess it's just 20 free nights for you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230264)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:33 AM
Author: yellow half-breed gaping

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230277)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:47 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

A sounds like a legitimate ad campaign I heard about once

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230371)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 1:12 PM
Author: boyish chapel

A, no question

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37231182)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 12:11 AM
Author: concupiscible address really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37228504)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:39 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) $2,000,000 tax free, but every time you pass by a place that sells burritos you must stop, find somebody who works there, and lecture them about how burritos are not really a traditional Mexican food, they were invented in the late 19th century near the US border and aren't found outside of the northernmost states of Mexico, and they were really only popularized in California in the 20th century. There is a mercy clause that says if you have already done this 5 times in one day, you no longer have to do it again that day.

B) $250,000 in cash tax free, plus an extra $100,000 in credits that can be applied to existing student loan debt (and only existing student loan debt), but each time you pass by a place that sells burritos you must stop there and exclaim "hell yeah burritos!" - there is no mercy rule.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230317)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:40 AM
Author: concupiscible address really tough guy

B

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230330)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:46 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

A and move to Europe, lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230368)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:40 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230320)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 10:52 AM
Author: Irradiated alpha

A) Once a day, you can repeat the word "nachos" a hundred times in a row, and a plate of nachos will appear in front of you. The way this hypo works is that each time you do this, the hypo fairies pick a random restaurant in the USA that serves nachos, and that restaurant's nachos are what appears. So some days you're treated to some fancy Tex-Mex restaurant's gourmet baked nachos covered in a heap of fresh guac and delicious grilled beef, and other days you get Taco Bell nachos or some bar's shitty attempt at nachos.

B) You can turn any beverage made by the Coca-Cola company into any beverage made by Pepsico, or vice-versa.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230391)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 11:06 AM
Author: flesh friendly grandma nibblets

B, and go to work with my uncle as a coke distributor. the hijinks could fill a dostoyevsky novel

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37230466)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 14th, 2018 4:25 PM
Author: Irradiated alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4130299&forum_id=2#37232684)