Then you’re 32 or so. Let’s say you’re at a 2/10 mentally.

Then bam. Someone important in your life is going to die. For me it was my mom suddenly. For you it might be someone else. I know a dude in my position and his little dood died at 7 months suddenly. ( *god forbid*) . I know a guy in the same position who just had a stroke and is in a wheelchair forever at age 37.

Just saying that life sometimes really sucks. Then BAM something even worse happens and you feel like you’re at a negative 8 out of 10.

Life at 30 and 40 isn’t just about debt, bullshit, nasty wife. People die and health problems come up.

Then you feel like you’re in a dusty cloud fever dream depression forever. Except this time you don’t wake up and everything is better.

I guess by 30 *most* people haven’t had something really bad happen to them. You will and you’ll realize that life is a horror show after horror show until you die. You finally get to that point where you don’t care if you die but you really mean it. Like you’ll stop suddenly in traffic and stop getting that feeling in your stomach.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40114419)

also shit just stops hurting after a while and you're just numb to it. wife died in childbirth? get a new one from thailand, she'll understand keeping a shrine to the old one

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40116591)

Then you feel like you’re in a dusty cloud fever dream depression forever. Except this time you don’t wake up and everything is better."

Holy shit does this guy gets it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40128773)

Whoops.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40114318)

My 30's have been some of the best years of my life. I still have youthful energy, ambition and imagination, but now I also have some wisdom and resources to use in pursuing my goals.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40114357)

If you're building a career - great. But also don't feel pigeonholed and be afraid to pivot - there's still time.

Also: spend more time with your parents (while they are around and have their minds intact) and start building wealth (saving and investing as much as possible - it will compound so much in 30-40 years). Try to take a vacation each year and go abroad if that's your thing. If you're single and interested in marriage/kids, start figuring out what you're looking for and who would be compatible with you longterm, and pursue that rather than swiping every cute bar slut on Tinder.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40119116)

But a few years later my income picked up, I have more opportunities than I would if i had stayed in law, and I am happier. While many of my biglaw colleagues are stuck forever in a downward spiral of smaller and smaller firms. tbf, some of them maed it and are in-house at big corps, but i wouldn't say most did.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115714)

Once you find wife, you should have kids asap. Truly no point in waiting - you'll never feel ready.

Manage to maintain some hobbies or interests (even if they're shelved for a few years). Ideally some or all of these are simple things.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40114653)

-light gardening

-cooking

Shelved a bit:

-wine (still buying and storing, but consumption is way down and I don't devote the same about of time reading and visiting)

-hiking (used to drag wife a couple of times/month, but tough with two kids 5 & under and a wife who wants to sleep in on the weekends)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40118070)

Also, don’t drink to excess to the point that you’re blacking out or borderline getting sick. Next morning recovery gets worse and worse with age. There is really no need to take shots, ever. I’m not sure why it took me so long to realize this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115129)

-Double your water intake. Probably if you do this your body will become much better regardless of what else you do.

-Floss every night. And floss well, up and down each side of the tooth, not just push in and out.

-If you've got hair, cut back on days you shampoo/conditioner if you can, say on weekends or WFH days.

-Increase use of say SPF 15 on your face on sunny days.

-People mention fitness/workout, yeah sure, just make sure you're thinking of low impact for joints (womanly yes but long-term value).

-Take the stairs.

-Increase fiber intake. Decrease sugar intake. Even whatever else you do with nutrition, these two go a long way. (And if you're not already, reducing alcohol intake.)

-Keep noisy shit out of your ears to save yourself from hearing loss.

So these are stupid trivial things that just require a little conscious effort. Unbelievable how much these add up.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115142)

there are also many sunscreens that are mineral-based or don’t have whatever shrew boogeyman toxins you are talking about. If you live in a sunny climate and spend some time working in the yard over the weekends, you are getting plenty of sun to stay at optimal health.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40118750)

Explain this one further?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40116489)

Granted every women's brain rewires after first kid and the first years are tougher, but do NOT marry the hot slightly crazy chick who is 180 in bed but just a little unstable.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115177)

EDIT: also, divorce can be so life-destroying bad that there is no reason to risk becoming someone's chattel slave (through alimony) unless you're getting something amazing out of the deal, i.e. kids.

I do a lot of divorce and some of the results from the family court are unspeakably evil, there is no worse life result than getting saddled with a big alimony award.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115954)

30 rocks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115755)

1. As a man, your 30's is when you go from being a young-man to a full grown man. Say goodbye to childish things and embrace your being full grown.

2. There is no time for bad women. If the girl is not marriage material, she has to go immediately.

3. Buy a boat. There is no end to why this is the CR. Also, buy a full sized truck.

4. Go out as much as you can. When kids come, it's over.

5. If you are with a woman who you think is the one, don't live together before you're married. Cohabitation is billed as a "trial-period" of marriage but it's not. Nothing can prepare you for marriage, best to go in with your eyes closed.

6. To build on #5, if you're with a girl you want to marry, marry her. Our ancestors barely knew the women they married. Also, as a divorce lawyer, I can tell you that I don't think that long courtships prevent divorce, I divorce plenty of people who were together for years prior to marriage.

7. Say HELL NO to a big wedding. The desire for a big wedding is the biggest red-flag of all for women and most of the really big weddings I have attended ended in relatively quick divorces.

8. Marriage is for the purpose of raising kids, so choose a wife that you think would be a good mom. Also, after getting married, there is no reason to wait to have kids.

9. Don't buy a house in the suburbs until you're married and planning on having kids.

10. Never complaint about your Wife to friends or family. Your complaining about your wife diminishes their opinion of you, handle your household the best you can but keep your family business between your family. Bad-wife poasting is the only CR if you want to complain about your wife.

I may think of more later, I'll add to the list.

EDIT:

11. Be careful with drug & alcohol use. Guys who really let loose with getting fucked up in their 30's can have bad outcomes. My stoner buddies have had trouble in life around 40, and my buddies who are raging drunks didn't have good outcomes when 40 hit. Like they say, drugs & alcohol go from fun, to fun with problems, to a problem. At 30, it's fun, but if you don't have control, at 40, it's problems.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115847)

I had my first at 36.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115921)

1) If you want kids, make sure you have at least 100k set aside for adoption. Much less if you're willing to settle for an Asian child or a Russian baby with fetal alcohol syndrome for adoption. If you're rich, you can do a surrogate, but let's assume you're average guy.

2) Don't stop going out or drinking. It's still fun.

3) You have to exercise now. No getting around it. It's required for maintenance now.

4) Do drugs but smaller amounts and with intention. No more all night coke/sex binges.

5) You're not a twink anymore, you're 34 but you tell people you're 29.

6) Settle into a nice relationship with a guy, and remember you can always make it an open relationship if you want to fuck other people but this is where companionship becomes important.

7) If you have nieces or nephews, be the greatest possible uncle/aunt you can, this is why god put you on earth and made you gay.

8) Continue to flaunt your relatively carefree lifestyle and ability to use disposable income on self to straight world/friends.

9) Brunch is still approved.

10) Own some type of property, somewhere like Palm Springs. Then talk about "my condo in Palm Springs".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40115987)

The only way to preserve the notion that your life has meaning is to invest in the next generation. Plus kids are fun.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40116232)

And by the end of age 30 he had wandered the desert, turned water into wine, formed his posse, and driven the moneymakers from the temple.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4522317&forum_id=2#40134644)