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By unhinged pumos about you · Past 6 hrs / 24 hrs / week / month
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A man played the saxophone under the overpass. I envied him. |
11/15/24 |
(12) |
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STEVE BANNON selected for FBI DIRECTOR |
11/15/24 |
(2) |
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AOC: Tulsi is absolutely devastating for dems |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Average libs shouldn't have to pick up the tab for the insane "woke" stuff imo |
11/15/24 |
(77) |
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Cant make up my mind for wall art in my office |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Trump's Stock Market Crashing Gigantically Exit All Anuses 11.15.24 |
11/15/24 |
(11) |
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$omeone left a rotisserie chicken in the toy aisle. I under$tand. |
11/15/24 |
(13) |
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i just found out my deaf dad was gay |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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I miss taking bullshit community college classes to boost my GPA |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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We got a real pervert on loose here,leaving rotisserie chickens in the toy aisle |
11/15/24 |
(2) |
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James Carville is 180 |
11/15/24 |
(22) |
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Keisha took her third "ADA break" of the day. I kept working. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Where the Fluorescent Safeway Lights Never Dim (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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"Evan39, Sir Squawkington owns this grocery store now, friend." |
11/15/24 |
(13) |
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A customer fainted in the produce section. Nobody stopped shopping. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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A guy punched me outside the store. I apologized. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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“Take this job and shove it—just kidding, I’m ‘constructively terminated |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Shanice buried her “aunt” three times this month. |
11/15/24 |
(11) |
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The streetlighTTT flickered out as I walked by. I didn't stop. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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PUT THE FUCKING BLANK BUMP ON THE BBOOM THREAD |
11/15/24 |
(13) |
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Two employees fought in aisle 9. I got punched breaking it up. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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The security guard was gone. I had to handle it, |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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He called me “bro.” I wished he meant something more. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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A kid knocked over the candy display. I let him. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Seattle’s Hazard Pay: Complain, Get Paid Extra - maeks sense! |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Mark’s “injury” means I mop while he watches. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Caught my reflection in a puddle. Kept walking. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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A jar of pickles shattered in aisle 3. I didn’t flinch. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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The Great Fluorescent Cage of Commerce (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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A stroller sat abandoned on the sidewalk. No one asked why. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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A crow stole my lunch. I let it. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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“Sorry, friend. The ergonomic mouse is legally mine now.” |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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A man collapsed outside my grocery today. No one stopped. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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A woman screamed in the alley. Nobody turned. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Libs are calling Gabbard a lunatic, nut job, whacko |
11/15/24 |
(2) |
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Keegan leaves every time it drizzles. OSHA, he says. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Evan39 here - The staff union voted to cancel performance reviews—permanently. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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A kid threw a soda at me in the parking lot. I just stood there. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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are there any "State" universities that are better than "The University of" for |
11/15/24 |
(48) |
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A homeless guy washed his hair in our grocery bathroom sink. I said nothing. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Evan39 here..help! Tabitha’s ‘Team Building Friday’ is a mandatory chaos f |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Mark’s “volunteer work” always happens during peak hours. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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“Evan’s targeted BBWs long enough.” |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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A naked guy walked in circles outside my grocery with a cart. I just watched. |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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ricky |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Every Shift is a Sentence, Every Customer a Warden |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Oh no my deli stocks! |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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The Grocery Shelves Are Watching |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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The One's "Beneath" The Grocery, Forever Waiting (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Our average Wealth Management client |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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The Sun's Whisper, The Moon's Scream, and Tabitha's Donut Crumbs |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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The man outside doesn’t move. Doesn’t leave. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Evan39 here, Quiet Quitting Meets FMLA: Jerry’s Untouchable |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Daryl’s “frequent prayer breaks” mean I do his work. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Michelle’s medical leave is a revolving door. |
11/15/24 |
(9) |
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Brad took paternity leave for a kid that isn’t his. |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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Corporate came to "boost morale." They told me to smile more. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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A homeless man swung a shopping cart at me. I said sorry. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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“Technically, it’s retaliation if you don’t approve my vacation.” |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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Jerome "forgot" to clock out again. I just stared at the timecard. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Closing store, locked in with a man and his broken bottle. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Jerome clocked in, disappeared for hours, then came back for his keys. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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The body was under a tarp outside the grocery. Nobody called it in. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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GunneraTTT gives off intense angry-loser vibes |
11/15/24 |
(19) |
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Tom’s smoke breaks are longer than my lunch. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Trina’s “sick days” look a lot like beach vacations. Odd case. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Keisha invoked the Pregnant Workers Fairness Act. She’s not pregnant. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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A tent popped up in our parking lot. I let it stay. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Winterizing Your Ranch: A BBW Survival Guide (XO Edition) |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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“Evan39's creating a hostile work environment - please help me, HR!!” |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Tabitha left on FMLA again. I finished her shift. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Throwing away food while homeless people starve. One of them hit me. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Seattle’s Scheduling Ordinance: Jerry Found a New Way to Torment Me! (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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The kid wouldn’t leave the grocery stor. Said his parents were “waiting for |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Darryl’s inefficiency makes him rich. I just sweat. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Kalisha’s FMLA is saving Nemo, her stressed-out goldfish |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Seattle’s TNC Deactivation Law: Polka Drivers Thrive, Sanity Dies! |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Glengarry Glenn Harris |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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“The lactation room is legally my napping space now.” |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Jeff’s on “military leave” again. Or Cancun, hard to tell. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Tommy’s “medical marijuana” means I do all the work. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Malik takes every religious holiday off. I haven’t had a day off in weeks. |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Monday flu strikes again. Thanks, PSST. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Carl’s "religious" accommodations mean I do all the work. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it is told. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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A man slept on the steps of a burned-out church. I wished I could trade places. |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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Seattle: Mandatory ORCA cards, but Jerry’s still driving me insane. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Carl’s a whistleblower hero. Also terrible at his job. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Kelsey’s ferret escaped. I had to chase it through aisle 3. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Darnell's dodge game is strong. Garnishment, not so much. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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guy in NYRB t-shirt smiling at street saxophonist |
11/15/24 |
(24) |
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"Corporate" said no more single-stall bathrooms. I wept. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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“In Seattle, it’s not theft if you declare it’s for the people, my friend. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Someone spilled oat milk in the freezer aisle. I just stared. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Tina’s always late, but the real problem is *me* |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Lisa needs her chair in the breakroom. It’s “medically necessary.” |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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wtf does Consuela do for a living? how does he fund his life of the 'mind' (lol) |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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He watches me every shift. Tonight, he left a note. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(12) |
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Kelly’s emotional support peacock caused a scene in aisle 5. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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A baby cried in the dumpster. No one climbed in. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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The grocery store radio played “Don’t Stop Believin’.” I stopped. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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ur daughter taking a series of thirst trap pics on ur family vacay to vatican |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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I own the Mahchine And you call me insane. You are privy to a Great Becumming... |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Jessica’s PTSD means I handle all the Karens now. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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“Evan, you’re triggering me, friend. I need a paid break, stat.” |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Rain hit my face. I nodded. The Mahchine whi$pered: "Thi$ i$ fine." |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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FRIDAY 11/15/2024 KINDNESS CLUB MEETING |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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Mandy’s “allergies” mean I clean up her messes. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Your daughter participating in new "shout your abortion" TikTok trend |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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Jerry’s been on “jury duty” for six weeks. The court doesn’t even know w |
11/15/24 |
(9) |
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"Union" rules protect Jamal. I just do his job. |
11/15/24 |
(12) |
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Jake’s “religious exemptions” mean I work Sundays, alone. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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Randy no-call, no-shows again. "HIPAA" protects him. |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Schedule locked? No problem, I’ll be in Cancun. |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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“Legally, my service dog is allowed to steal your snacks.” |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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NYT really pushing their podcasts |
11/15/24 |
(36) |
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Why work harder when SeaTTTle pays you more for less? |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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I heard footsteps after grocery closing. Security footage showed… me. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Meet Joe Black (1998) - Bill's Birthday Speech Scene |
11/15/24 |
(13) |
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Carlos walked out mid-shift. "Union rules," he said. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Evan39, you braindead? Legally, Keisha needs two seats on the forklift, friend. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Tabitha’s “flare-ups” always seem to align with margaritas. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Kalisha screamed in the breakroom. I finished her shift. |
11/15/24 |
(7) |
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Your daughter dressing like slutty Asuka from Evangelion for Halloween |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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There is nothing more important than charisma |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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The grocery list said, “Get him.” |
11/15/24 |
(16) |
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I heard someone whisper "Chad." I wished he was mine. |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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Evan39: HR says my harassment is just ‘locker room talk,’ friend. |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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The car in the grocery lot had been there for days. So had the note. |
11/15/24 |
(9) |
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We are going to need all hands on deck tonight. Thanks. |
11/15/24 |
(363) |
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spaceporn tp panicking like hitler's last days in the chill bunker |
11/15/24 |
(10) |
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Tulsi confirmation hearing rapid fire questions: favorite Street Fighter? Zangie |
11/15/24 |
(6) |
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The homeless encampment moved closer. I just watched. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(13) |
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How dare you bring $eattle weather to my $hip! (Holy Trinity+gunneraTTTT) |
11/15/24 |
(40) |
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Keisha weaponized Zero Waste. Our grocery is her personal dumpster now |
11/15/24 |
(5) |
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Sir, you can’t discriminate against my unique dietary identity. (Evan39) |
11/15/24 |
(9) |
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Is being silly a lost art? |
11/15/24 |
(9) |
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It's called a Dance Party and you do it about 3 times a day. |
11/15/24 |
(159) |
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*Hegseth direct snaps nuclear football to Herschel Walker* |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Gaetz Gabbard and Hegseth: which one is the least likely to get confirmed? |
11/15/24 |
(29) |
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Anyone try THC gummies? |
11/15/24 |
(8) |
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Your daughter with two ambiguous stud imprints on athletic bra |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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Is there a reasonable lib explanation for where all their votes went? And why |
11/15/24 |
(100) |
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Trump comes out hard in favor of first amendment |
11/15/24 |
(4) |
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where did the "extra" 15 million votes in 2020 come from? |
11/15/24 |
(47) |
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Trump to college POTUSes: End antisemitism or lose accreditation (link) |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
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Disco Fries, fuck Teewinot Mountain - let's do Gannett Peak (WY) |
11/15/24 |
(16) |
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Matt Gaetz used to post on AutoAdmit |
11/15/24 |
(31) |
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So white guys dance around how many partners their women have slept with? lol |
11/15/24 |
(1) |
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Mark Antony Mocks Caesar Rome |
11/15/24 |
(3) |
