Thunder Collins update: the endgame nears
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: April 20th, 2020 12:11 PM Author: odious water buffalo
My wife has become completely unglued as this quarantine progresses. Just batshit insane and abusive.
We tried to go to the San Clemente beach a couple weeks ago and they shut it down. So I drop her off at our neighborhood playground to use the sand there instead. A guy in the neighborhood comes up and harasses her and tells her she should be ashamed of putting her daughter's life at risk. He comes back multiple times and starts recording her. My wife went ballistic on them and she calls me screaming. I go to talk to the guy who did this and chew him out for being a dick and they call the cops on us. Six cop cars show up for a domestic violence call.
She screams for hours a day and has threatened to kill me multiple times. I woke up one night last week to her punching me in the head. My daughter asked me if mommy had hurt me last weekend and I said no. She later grabs my daughter and tells her - while she is in tears - that daddy is a bad man and he hurts mommy.
I told her I want a divorce and that she is mentally ill and have begun reaching out to lawyers this morning.
Taking questions and advice.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40053801) |
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Date: April 21st, 2020 4:00 AM Author: Hairless Quadroon
If only someone had warned you.
Thoughts and prayers friend.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40060291) |
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Date: April 20th, 2020 7:28 PM Author: Ocher nowag
The more issues you have (especially medically related), the more expensive it's to litigate.
You need to think through the financial implications.
This could easily cost 100s of thousands when the woman is batshit crazy who refuses to amicably negotiate things outside of court.
Think very very carefully about this.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40057340) |
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Date: April 20th, 2020 1:27 PM Author: odious water buffalo
One 2.5 year old that is hyperactive and wakes up at 5 in the morning
One 6 month old
Life is hell. Everyone says just divorce pussy, but it is terribly difficult to take care of both of them alone.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054473) |
Date: April 20th, 2020 12:28 PM Author: comical copper hall skinny woman
Oh hey. I asked about you a couple times in threads. Glad you're okay, sort of.
Think about how much better you will feel in 6 months or a year when you're on the other side of this and free. If that won't do it, leave for your kids.
Wait. Unless, do you think she will treat your kids better or worse once you're out of the picture?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40053940) |
Date: April 20th, 2020 1:09 PM Author: Insanely creepy multi-billionaire
TC, you know what the chances are that this woman may actually kill you? Greater than 0%.
If you don't GTFO, she will. Further, she'll wait for the most opportune time and absolutely fuck you to the wall. If you initiate divorce, you'll be civil and try to be fair (because that's what almost all men do), but if she does it, she will treat you worse than a bum on side of the road.
Yea you'll probably get fucked in this divorce. However, you're fucked anyways, at least you can get your kids out of this awful situation.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054356) |
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Date: April 20th, 2020 1:16 PM Author: odious water buffalo
There is a low chance she will kill me.
My goal has been to get out of SoCal into a lower COL environment and then feel less stressed about divorce when my kids are a little older.
Will I get fucked in a divorce? I have proof she has been abusive and she makes $350-$400K while I am only pulling in $150-175k. Plus the house and car loans are in my name only because her credit is garbage.
I know men get fucked in divorce and she is going to be irrationally hostile. But I feel like I may be in an okay position now.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054405) |
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Date: April 21st, 2020 3:40 AM Author: elite point
Supervised visits with your kids for four hours a week.
If you actually listened to good advice you could get primary custody but you don’t.
I’ve already told you that your recordings are illegal under California law and you have waited too long to pull the trigger to use DV as a custody grab as a man.
You made your bed etc.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40060235) |
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Date: April 21st, 2020 4:11 PM Author: odious water buffalo
How are they illegal? I (usually) tell her I am recording her and she doesn't ask me to stop. I have copies of text messages where she is threatening crazy shit as well. Seems like that should count for something.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40063554)
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Date: April 21st, 2020 6:36 PM Author: elite point
If she knows you are recording and doesn't object then that should be implied consent.
I actually started typing that holding onto the videos for years could backfire on your DVRO case, but then I remembered that she was threatening to file false allegations against you.
You could convince a judge that originally you started collecting these videos to protect yourself if she filed false allegations against you, but that her behavior became increasingly erratic and now you actually fear for your safety and that of your children.
You probably want to file a motion for a psych eval and if you are willing to spend the money you should file a motion for a custody evaluation. These things could cost $20-30K, but your chances are 1000x greater of winning a custody battle via a custody evaluation than leaving your fate to a 90 IQ Family Court services social worker.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40064597) |
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Date: April 21st, 2020 2:23 PM Author: Insanely creepy multi-billionaire
I believe that you have made the decision to not leave her, no matter what. I think you are afraid of her, and I think that you have very good reason to be afraid. However, due to your fear of leaving her, you put the "ball in her court," and she is not going to go on being miserable for the rest of her life.
So, outcomes:
10% she cheats bigly and you have a nice outcome in your divorce.
89% she sets up this divorce perfectly for herself, taking months (or years) to prepare, and when the time is right, hits you with a divorce action that you will never financially or emotionally recover from. You will be paying child support (and maybe alimony) based on our absolute upper income figures and your time with your children will be severely limited. You will lose most of your assets.
1% you realize that you're playing with your life and go on the offensive and take the fight to her.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40062851)
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Date: April 20th, 2020 1:43 PM Author: odious water buffalo
She was in talk therapy during her residency and it was worthless.
She takes mood stabilizers and they usually help is she is also getting sleep.
She needs intensive therapy and yeah maybe psychedelics and meditation.
She is in denial that she has a personality disorder and refuses to get evaluated because she views it as a waste and doesn’t want to be recognized as an impaired physician because that could hurt her career and cost her money in higher malpractice insurance.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054611) |
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Date: April 20th, 2020 1:50 PM Author: Drunken Bateful Reading Party Chad
yeah, this is not something someone can talk themselves out of.
she really should try meditation, at the very least. i know of people with BPD or BPD like traits who benefited greatly from it. there's a lot of evidence that mindfulness dampens activity in the emotional centers of the brain. the effect can be greatly enhanced with low dose psychedelics.
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-50612-3?sf222886569=1
she might not like this initially, but she would probably start feeling noticeably better after just a week of regular practice.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054690) |
Date: April 20th, 2020 2:09 PM Author: comical copper hall skinny woman
Ayeee, she is a doctor. Disturbing. I like to think of doctors as stable, even keeled characters.
Maybe she'll contract COVID.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40054873) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2020 1:19 PM Author: chestnut irradiated mad-dog skullcap temple
jeez...that rack with those skinny arms and neck. Know you've mentioned that she's had some help, but still.
Nice smile, although appears a bit fragile, like it's covering some anxiety?
Wish her soles were pinker. :(
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40077313) |
Date: April 21st, 2020 4:28 AM Author: Hairless Quadroon
If you get full custody and she refuses to pay alimony, will you be able to go to the battered men’s shelter with the kids? Will you get “Men with Infant Children” (MIC) stamps to buy groceries and diapers? Subsidized daycare? Etc, etc.
Honestly, the ONLY bright spot for you in this situation is that she makes a lot more money than you.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40060335)
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Date: April 21st, 2020 4:17 PM Author: onyx institution
TC, please poast moar pics!
Don't give up. I'm pulling for you and your family. Try dosing her up with some LSD and running mind control on her. You can get some legal synthetics online using cryptos.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40063604) |
Date: April 21st, 2020 6:05 PM Author: Dashing carmine sneaky criminal
I think it's best to just assume that you're going to be screwed in any sort of divorce proceedings, moreso because of what you said earlier:
"She is unstable as fuck, but you would never know it in a professional setting. She will talk on the phone for work and sound completely lucid and calm"
Doesn't mean that divorce isn't still the right answer, but would definitely lower your expectations for how it'll go for you.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40064374) |
Date: April 21st, 2020 6:13 PM Author: azure excitant boiling water
Set up a bunch of Nest cameras throughout the house as a security system. tell her it's for the safety of the family during these turbulent times.
Pay for a subscription and download and save clips of her acting out. I feel like there has to be some security camera exception for the 2 party consent rule the other poaster mentioned.
if you ever go hiking push her off a cliff.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40064434) |
Date: April 21st, 2020 10:11 PM Author: Yapping market
okay. as some in this thread know, i divorced a borderline. it quite literally saved my life. and i think it might save my daughter too.
maybe this is too serious for XO, but you are standing at a crossroads.
if you choose to stay, you are dooming yourself and your children to long, miserable, dysfunctional lives. she is a borderline. she will never improve. she will never get "fixed." there is an excellent chance that your reward for your loyalty will be either redoubled pain, her divorcing YOU, or suicide. it will never be better.
if you choose the right path, you will experience the most intense fight you've ever known. i had such a turbulent childhood that i ran away at 16. i had an ultra-rare liver disease that nearly killed me at 19. i had to restart my career at 31. none of these events came CLOSE to the emotional omaha beach of divorce... but now i'm two years out and HAPPY. and my daughter knows when she's with daddy it's a peaceful, serene place she can thrive.
im not going to post in this thread again. i've warned you several times but i also understand how hard of a position you're in. so i've gone through the trouble of setting up an email for you:
bigdogthrowawayforthunder@gmail.com
If you email me I will send a throwaway Google Voice number and i can give you advice and tips.
i repeat myself: this will never get better unless you take action
call me if you want. otherwise, goodbye and good luck
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40066093) |
Date: April 21st, 2020 10:50 PM Author: awkward lascivious therapy
Did somebody say . . . Endgame?
Hello Mr. Collins. I want to play a game with you.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40066397) |
Date: April 22nd, 2020 6:36 AM Author: vigorous cordovan mexican
the thing people don't realize is BPD is literally untreatable
Sure you can treat some ancillary symptoms like anxiety, depression with drugs but there is NO proven therapeutic for BPD. doctors avoid even diagnosing people with it because there is no hoap. the only thing to show any efficacy whatsoever is intense CBT, which basically no BPD people will ever complete.
if you met someone with narcissistic personality disorder would you tell them to go to a doctor? no, of course not, that would be ridiculous. it's the same thing with BPD. these cluster B disorders are to humans what a crack in the foundation is to a building.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40067842) |
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Date: April 22nd, 2020 7:33 AM Author: bright space
I have a female relative who is BPD.
Everything you said is accurate.
It can’t be fixed, & it’s impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who has it.
They cannot control their emotional impulses.
The worst thing a man can do is marry a bpd woman.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40067958) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2020 6:06 AM Author: Haunting turdskin
There are far more toxic, broken homes now
Top risk factors for developing BPD are abuse and abandonment at a young age
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4514460&forum_id=2",#40075188)
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