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Johnsmeyer calling Suze Orman w/ "Scream" voice distorter
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| hairraiser people who are hurt church building | 03/24/20 |
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| Thirsty school cafeteria electric furnace | 08/10/20 |
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| vermilion business firm | 03/27/25 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: June 11th, 2014 11:36 PM Author: cracking orchestra pit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733527) |
Date: June 11th, 2014 11:38 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig You should've been a comedy writer (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733532) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:38 PM Author: arousing amethyst national (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733535) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:39 PM Author: red cumskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733537) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:40 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig Suze: "sir, can I ask how tall you are."
*very long pause*
Robot/monster voice: " five nine" |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:40 PM Author: red cumskin LOL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733551) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:41 PM Author: cracking orchestra pit laughing & convlusing & foamign at mouth at work lmfao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733555) |
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Date: April 4th, 2015 3:56 PM Author: Lake Fragrant Institution Mexican (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#27619755) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:59 PM Author: Comical mother (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733697) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 12:11 AM Author: Bistre Vivacious Milk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25733775) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:22 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25738401) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:23 PM Author: Concupiscible white potus persian (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25738402) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:23 PM Author: Sinister stage boistinker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25738403) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:36 PM Author: beady-eyed ebony locus international law enforcement agency holy shit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25738512) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:38 PM Author: Ivory Multi-colored Pervert Holy shit screaming/vomiting (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25738527) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 8:23 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig JFC (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25739208) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:10 PM Author: Comical mother i really dont know why but this cracks me the eff up (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25743978) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:22 PM Author: red cumskin Well to start, you have Suze Orman neighing a complete non-sequitur of a question that hits at the linchpin of Johnsmeyer's tragic character: his height. Who knows why that has come up? Maybe PAYE? Maybe estate planning re a farm with gold statues? Maybe what to do with his minor league performance bonus? So we get a brilliant start.
Then we get stuck in the long pause purgatory, but it's a good purgatory. We know what might happen next and on first read, 8 times out of 10 we'll guess correctly. But during the long pause your anticipation wells up. You can envision Johnsmeyer nervously fumbling with the Scream robot voice machine pressed against an old landline phone with a curly cord that's way, way too long in a dark Manhattan basement closet apartment, thinking of whether to answer truthfully and whether the Scream robot voice machine is actually working to cover his identity. It's not that he's weird, he's just shy, a little embarrassed and wants anonymity. It's really absurd, but you give the little guy the benefit of the doubt and hope he doesn't hang up out of fear while pissing his pants. Besides, chances are he already pissed his pants after the big Suze asked him about his relationship status, which prompted him to look up at an out of focus picture of some girl named Dutchess that's the only thing on his otherwise bare windowless walls.
You see all this in the long pause which is then pierced by the Scream robot voice as it responds "five nine" which is hilarious because it's earnestly delivered in such an bizarre manner. You can hear the voice clearly in your head while envisioning Johnsmeyer in his apartment and Suze and her producers in the studio wondering wtf kind of savant is on the other end of the line. But it's doubly hilarious because we all know Johnsy boy is really five seven, on a good day. |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:25 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig TY FOR YOUR SERVICE (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744029) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:29 PM Author: appetizing stead filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744049) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:30 PM Author: Bistre Vivacious Milk Poast of the year (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744051) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:31 PM Author: canary center nibblets this is scholarship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744053) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:32 PM Author: Comical mother Loool 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744063) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:35 PM Author: tan titillating lodge wrinkle suze orman keeping steady, unconcerned eye contact into the camera during the pause (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744079) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:42 PM Author: floppy onyx police squad I read this with the Charlie Kelly voice (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744101) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:53 PM Author: beady-eyed ebony locus international law enforcement agency whoa (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744164) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:59 PM Author: Concupiscible white potus persian (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25744191) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 8:33 PM Author: Well-lubricated talented abode (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25745855) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 10:55 PM Author: cracking orchestra pit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#25746687) |
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Date: February 14th, 2015 5:47 PM Author: Well-lubricated talented abode (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#27315083) |
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Date: April 4th, 2015 4:04 PM Author: lascivious resort partner 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#27619800) |
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Date: August 5th, 2015 10:01 PM Author: Wonderful purple haunted graveyard (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28487531) |
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Date: August 5th, 2015 11:57 PM Author: mustard kitchen selfie (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28488640) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:24 AM Author: Coral marvelous gunner jewess (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28489891) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:28 AM Author: Maroon laughsome affirmative action double fault lol you're like the judge who wrote the Pepsi Points opinion from 1L contracts (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28489907) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:39 AM Author: Bateful gold famous landscape painting How did I miss this? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28489936) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 10:43 AM Author: trip cuck space (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28490163) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 1:33 PM Author: Umber vibrant sweet tailpipe sound barrier (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28491214) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 1:34 PM Author: Heady brunch karate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28491223) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 11:56 PM Author: Spectacular french sanctuary there is some true comedic talent on this bort (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28497490) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 11:59 PM Author: angry legal warrant boltzmann lol damn dude, nice work (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28497522) |
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Date: October 8th, 2015 6:05 AM Author: Umber vibrant sweet tailpipe sound barrier the real important part is that this only took 12 minutes to write (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28924462) |
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Date: October 8th, 2015 6:39 AM Author: topaz background story indian lodge curly phone cord that's way too long really hit home (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#28924483) |
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Date: November 18th, 2015 3:44 PM Author: Orange deer antler (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#29207618) |
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Date: November 18th, 2015 3:48 PM Author: charismatic scarlet principal's office old irish cottage (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#29207642) |
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Date: December 17th, 2015 5:19 PM Author: Wonderful purple haunted graveyard (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#29401582) |
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Date: December 17th, 2015 5:24 PM Author: mustard kitchen selfie (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#29401618) |
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Date: March 14th, 2016 12:56 AM Author: aromatic mint plaza immigrant (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#30051818) |
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Date: May 31st, 2016 3:10 PM Author: Coral marvelous gunner jewess (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#30594657) |
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Date: May 31st, 2016 3:17 PM Author: cerebral pearl fanboi (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#30594696) |
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Date: July 24th, 2016 9:14 AM Author: Bistre Vivacious Milk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#31014517) |
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Date: November 29th, 2016 6:59 PM Author: idiotic mahogany fortuitous meteor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#32018277) |
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Date: June 2nd, 2017 8:48 AM Author: chestnut pozpig corner (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#33453658) |
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Date: June 3rd, 2017 12:59 PM Author: flesh deranged field ljl at anyone who says this place hasn't gone downhill with all the politics and crypto spam (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#33463157) |
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Date: December 10th, 2018 10:08 AM Author: racy shimmering shitlib (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#37381941) |
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Date: January 29th, 2018 10:12 PM Author: curious orchid feces stage (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#35273685) |
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Date: May 13th, 2018 9:50 PM Author: Excitant peach box office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#36044055) |
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Date: December 10th, 2018 10:08 AM Author: racy shimmering shitlib (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#37381939) |
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Date: June 25th, 2019 4:51 AM Author: exhilarant halford national security agency this poa was clearly made w/ genuine love (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#38436191) |
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Date: December 25th, 2019 5:59 PM Author: red cumskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#39324796) |
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Date: December 30th, 2019 8:37 PM Author: Well-lubricated talented abode this is the best poast on xo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#39352602) |
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Date: February 2nd, 2020 5:38 PM Author: adventurous lemon tank (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#39529036) |
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Date: June 26th, 2020 5:32 PM Author: Narrow-minded Forum Azn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#40501651) |
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Date: March 27th, 2021 12:19 AM Author: Violent Chapel Multi-billionaire (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#42172476) |
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Date: June 15th, 2021 9:43 PM Author: cordovan property scourge upon the earth (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#42634165) |
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Date: June 21st, 2024 6:27 PM Author: red cumskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2\u0026hid=#47767334) |
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*Audible click from phone, then dial tone*
Suze: "Well it looks like we lost 'Duke' from New York".
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