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2 yr. ago

tolstea

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Gay Anal Fissure Success Story?

Sharing this because these are the resources I needed 2 years ago. Hopefully it helps someone here too!

I am M32. I developed chronic anal fissures in 2020 and at one point I had 5 simultaneously during an examination. As you can imagine this affected nearly every area of my life: my romantic relationship with my fiance, sitting at work, mental health, and I developed anxiety around BMs. Not a great place to be, not to mention I couldn't bottom for about 2 years.

For me these probably developed from receiving anal sex and they didn't go away. My saving grace was finding an LGBT-friendly doctor at my city's primary hospital/medical center who specialized in HIV treatment (even though I am not HIV+), she's "heard it all!", specializes in butt stuff, and I didn't feel judged or embarrassed.

Over the course of months we tried a variety of approaches ranging from dietary changes to surgery. Here's what helped on a scale from minor to major:

FIBER. This alone just about healed everything up but if I missed even one day the fissures came back. I still could not have anal sex without tearing.

Bidet. This prevented scratching and chaffing. Wet wipes can make it worse and contain chemicals unhelpful for healing. However a bidet can sting like a mother fucker if you have an active fissure. Still a life saver though.

RX Ointment. Highly recommended and provided near immediate relief and assisted with healing. I had to get it from a compounding pharmacy with a prescription, but it is ointment with 2% Diltiazem, and 2% Lidocaine.

Sigmoidoscopy. A less invasive colonoscopy that doesn't require anesthesia. It checks for chronic fissures and other internal issues like inflammation or cancer. Benefits include potential biopsy, cancer screening, and a good look at your insides! This is a prerequisite to surgery and Botox.

Botox. Yes I've got a Botoxed booty hole and proud of it! For me this has thus far been the ONLY single thing that has made a difference. If you have chronic, long duration fissures, chances are you're clenching. I was unable to fully relax my sphincter which led to painful BMs and painful sex. Botox forced that muscle to relax and within a week I felt "back to normal" for the first time in 2 years!!! I waited a few weeks to bottom which is advised. It was still mildly uncomfortable until...

Vaseline. How no one suggested this is beyond me. Use Vaseline as lube. It prevents friction and aids in BMs post-sex. The first time I bottomed with Vaseline, my partner's dick slipped in so easily I was astonished. Warning: Vaseline degrades condoms so I only recommend it if you are in a situation where you trust your sexual partner and don't need a condom.

Sphincterotomy. This is my next step if fissures return after the Botox wears off. Google it, but essentially they cut a small amount of your sphincter muscle to keep it from involuntarily clenching. It's basically a permanent Botox treatment. I will sign up for it immediately should fissures return when the Botox wears off.

Humor. When meeting with doctors and specialists, you have to laugh. Don't downplay your pain because this was, in many ways, the worst two years of my life, but when a med student at a teaching hospital is timid, you have to lighten the mood with some butt stuff jokes. Just embrace it and put everyone at ease.

You're not a weirdo and this problem is real and it is painful. I felt like I needed someone who had experienced this to hug me and cry with me and empathize with me. So consider this your virtual hug. Good luck out there!

EDIT: Update nearly a year later...

The Botox worked great but once it wore off, the fissures came back. My muscle clenches which was likely causing fissures during sex but also would prevent them from healing. The fact that Botox helped, made me a great candidate for a Lateral Internal Sphincterotomy (LIS) which I had in September.

LIS is a surgery where my internal sphincter was cut to prevent it from involuntarily clenching. This forces the muscle to relax (like Botox), but is permanent. Within a couple of weeks I realized this was absolutely the right decision for me and I have no regrets about it, however, this option is not for everyone and you should definitely do some research and consult your doctor before getting set on this as an option. There is a very small risk of incontinence as a result of the surgery which thankfully hasn't affected me, but you should definitely consult your doctor and ask as many questions as you can before having the surgery.

The week following the surgery was uncomfortable and painful at times, but it became very obvious that the surgery worked after just a few days. BMs we're no longer uncomfortable and I was able to discern if the pain was from the surgery or from fissures. (It was from the surgery and subsided after a couple of days.) Pro-tip: painkillers make you constipated which makes assessing anal recovery real difficult. Only take them if you really need them and continue to take fiber!

Through the comments on this post, I became aware of Dr. Evan Goldstein of Bespoke Surgical which specializes in anal health, treatment, and reconstruction. Though I did not use his office, I did find some helpful resources. He promotes and sells a glass dilator set from Future Method that helps open you up and creates a healthy amount of friction to train your sphincter and prevent scar tissue from re-tearing.

Future Method Glass Dilator Set

Following the surgery, and training with the dilator set, I'm now able to comfortably bottom again (cue the angelic choir)! I'm always careful, and my partner and I have a great basis for communication; if anything feels off, we stop and try again later or do something else.

On the humor front, whenever I take medical surveys and am asked if I've ever had surgery I get to see "YES!" and then watch the confusion set in when I have to explain what a LIS is. My partner is also quick to correct me whenever I say I've never had Botox, quoting Dakota Johnson on The Ellen Show, "That's not the truth Ellen..."

Good luck out there and don't be afraid to message me if you have questions!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5635072&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5231527",#48343946)

Botoxed booty hole tp

So many amazing monikers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5635072&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5231527",#48344054)