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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
French cyan mother
  12/29/15
b!
Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration
  12/29/15
C
Violent lay halford
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
c
odious ape national
  12/29/15
a
vibrant stead
  12/29/15
a
Frozen dilemma friendly grandma
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
French cyan mother
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
?
swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
French cyan mother
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
c for sure
swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake
  12/29/15
C
Frozen dilemma friendly grandma
  12/29/15
c
twinkling irradiated property
  12/29/15
Xo
Violent lay halford
  12/29/15
chaturbate
lemon irate garrison
  12/30/15
C!
Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Adulterous rigor space
  12/29/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/29/15
...
Violent lay halford
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
twinkling irradiated property
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Sepia curious rehab
  12/29/15
lol ouch
honey-headed bawdyhouse community account
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake
  12/29/15
...
electric brethren
  12/30/15
...
well-lubricated aqua coffee pot
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
Contagious Regret
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
French cyan mother
  12/30/15
2
honey-headed bawdyhouse community account
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
Contagious Regret
  12/30/15
police
lemon irate garrison
  12/30/15
1
Frozen dilemma friendly grandma
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Violent lay halford
  12/30/15
...
Violent lay halford
  01/02/16
4 and 180
twinkling irradiated property
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
twinkling irradiated property
  12/30/15
...
Violent lay halford
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
jet-lagged french chef generalized bond
  01/11/16
...
Charismatic meetinghouse potus
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Cerise supple tanning salon
  11/05/20
...
abusive avocado fanboi
  12/13/25
...
Purple razzle-dazzle feces death wish
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: French cyan mother

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Violent lay halford

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: odious ape national

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: vibrant stead

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Frozen dilemma friendly grandma

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: French cyan mother

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: French cyan mother

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Frozen dilemma friendly grandma

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: twinkling irradiated property

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Violent lay halford

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: lemon irate garrison

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Sable Twisted Roommate Internal Respiration

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Adulterous rigor space

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Violent lay halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: twinkling irradiated property

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Sepia curious rehab

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: honey-headed bawdyhouse community account

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: swashbuckling light half-breed corn cake

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: electric brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: well-lubricated aqua coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: Contagious Regret

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: French cyan mother

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: honey-headed bawdyhouse community account

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Contagious Regret

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: lemon irate garrison

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Frozen dilemma friendly grandma

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Violent lay halford

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Violent lay halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: twinkling irradiated property

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: twinkling irradiated property

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Violent lay halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: jet-lagged french chef generalized bond

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: Charismatic meetinghouse potus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Cerise supple tanning salon

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: abusive avocado fanboi



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: Purple razzle-dazzle feces death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5309378#41284137)