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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo
  12/29/15
b!
Ruddy kitchen reading party
  12/29/15
C
Diverse Gay Wizard
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
c
impertinent station
  12/29/15
a
Shimmering vibrant pocket flask
  12/29/15
a
Cocky area new version
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Ruddy kitchen reading party
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Ruddy kitchen reading party
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
galvanic misanthropic resort
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
?
galvanic misanthropic resort
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
c for sure
galvanic misanthropic resort
  12/29/15
C
Cocky area new version
  12/29/15
c
bat-shit-crazy office
  12/29/15
Xo
Diverse Gay Wizard
  12/29/15
chaturbate
crimson big chapel genital piercing
  12/30/15
C!
Ruddy kitchen reading party
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Ruddy kitchen reading party
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Citrine Crotch Corner
  12/29/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/29/15
...
Diverse Gay Wizard
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
bat-shit-crazy office
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Multi-colored Market Laser Beams
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Harsh Yellow Weed Whacker Senate
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
galvanic misanthropic resort
  12/29/15
...
Appetizing Site Scourge Upon The Earth
  12/30/15
...
Navy Shrine Alpha
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
drab stage people who are hurt
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo
  12/30/15
2
Harsh Yellow Weed Whacker Senate
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
drab stage people who are hurt
  12/30/15
police
crimson big chapel genital piercing
  12/30/15
1
Cocky area new version
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Diverse Gay Wizard
  12/30/15
...
Diverse Gay Wizard
  01/02/16
4 and 180
bat-shit-crazy office
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
bat-shit-crazy office
  12/30/15
...
Diverse Gay Wizard
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Clear fiercely-loyal hairy legs menage
  01/11/16
...
Tan double fault
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Awkward principal's office
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
Idiotic twisted sneaky criminal
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Ruddy kitchen reading party

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: impertinent station

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Shimmering vibrant pocket flask

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Cocky area new version

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Ruddy kitchen reading party

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Ruddy kitchen reading party

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: galvanic misanthropic resort

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: galvanic misanthropic resort

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: galvanic misanthropic resort

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Cocky area new version

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: bat-shit-crazy office

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: crimson big chapel genital piercing

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Ruddy kitchen reading party

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Ruddy kitchen reading party

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Citrine Crotch Corner

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: bat-shit-crazy office

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Multi-colored Market Laser Beams

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Harsh Yellow Weed Whacker Senate

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: galvanic misanthropic resort

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: Appetizing Site Scourge Upon The Earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: Navy Shrine Alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: drab stage people who are hurt

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: vivacious jet-lagged theater stage tattoo

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Harsh Yellow Weed Whacker Senate

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: drab stage people who are hurt

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: crimson big chapel genital piercing

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Cocky area new version

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: bat-shit-crazy office

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: bat-shit-crazy office

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Diverse Gay Wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Clear fiercely-loyal hairy legs menage

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: Tan double fault



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Awkward principal's office

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: Idiotic twisted sneaky criminal



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751",#41284137)