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Twas the Night Before Christmas (Peterman version)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J ...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/03/18
...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/03/18
TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy ...
Mind-boggling Onyx Property Personal Credit Line
  12/03/18
ty!
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/03/18
jfc, this was 180. This is why I continue to visit this d...
At-the-ready parlor
  12/03/18
...
curious idiotic tattoo corner
  12/24/21
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arousing mewling space
  12/03/18
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Lavender Knife
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Jet-lagged lodge round eye
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At-the-ready parlor
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burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/18
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arousing mewling space
  12/24/18
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beady-eyed brindle athletic conference
  12/24/18
To be fair, What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vu...
Swollen aphrodisiac multi-billionaire native
  12/24/18
120
sooty insecure orchestra pit faggot firefighter
  12/24/18
...
burgundy nowag rehab
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sooty insecure orchestra pit faggot firefighter
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Spruce fragrant legal warrant gas station
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burgundy nowag rehab
  12/16/21
...
Autistic plum cumskin new version
  12/24/18
...
frum locale pistol
  12/24/18
this was pretty good, nice work
electric citrine electric furnace den
  12/24/18
~*Christmas in July bump*~
burgundy nowag rehab
  07/01/19
...
arousing mewling space
  07/01/19
...
arousing mewling space
  07/01/19
Early December Bump
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/10/19
getting close...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/20/19
ding ding ding
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
...
Razzmatazz Associate
  12/24/19
...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
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soul-stirring pit antidepressant drug
  12/24/19
This deserves more bumps.
Passionate Son Of Senegal Shrine
  12/24/19
...
Slap-happy Snowy Community Account
  12/24/19
lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180
Spruce fragrant legal warrant gas station
  12/24/19
lol
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
This
curious idiotic tattoo corner
  12/24/21
Missed this the first time. Great work dude. 180
Ungodly violent site mexican
  12/24/19
ty, labor of love
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
...
Vivacious pocket flask
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...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
lube up your chimneys!
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/19
pure gold 180
curious idiotic tattoo corner
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...
burgundy nowag rehab
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arrogant crotch
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burgundy nowag rehab
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burgundy nowag rehab
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Cracking church sweet tailpipe
  12/24/20
It's time.
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/24/20
...
domesticated hissy fit tanning salon
  12/24/20
...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/16/21
...
mauve blathering public bath roommate
  12/16/21
...
Cracking church sweet tailpipe
  12/16/21
Chri$tmas $pirit
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/20/21
Lmao
overrated philosopher-king candlestick maker
  12/20/21
...
burgundy nowag rehab
  12/22/21
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overrated philosopher-king candlestick maker
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big turquoise karate abode
  12/24/21
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curious idiotic tattoo corner
  12/25/23
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grown men with poopy butt cracks
  12/25/25
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nude butt cheeks
  12/25/25
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constantscreen the great
  12/25/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J

Lots of truckers were hungry, much like any old day;

The rig pigs were hung, taking dick pics with care,

In hopes that St. Peterman soon would be there;

The truckers were horny, dicks throbbing and red ,

While visions of Peter’s plums danced in their heads;

And Earl in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down longing for Peterman’s gap,

When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the truck to see what was the matter.

Away to the lot I flew like a flash,

Tore open my zipper in hope of fresh gash.

The moon on the breast of the softly lit J

Made the lot lizards glow, all looking to play,

When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a beady-eyed Peterman, and eight tiny trans-queers,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this night would be sick.

More rapid than eagles out their trousers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, FLASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, ROCKET ! on CUPID! on, BONER and SHITZEN!

To the back of the truck! to the top of the wall!

Now suck away! suck away! fuck away all!"

As lubed holes that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with a cock, were mounted to the sky,

So up to the truck-stops the trans-queers they flew,

With the sleigh full of boys, and St. Peterman too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little poof.

As he jerked with his hand, and was turning around,

“Stuff my chimney!” said St. Peterman on the ground.

He was dressed all in latex, from his head to his foot,

His knees were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of dildos he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just lifting his sac.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his boihole like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin had cum white as snow;

The stump of my pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And his lips did encircle its head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

His broad backside shook like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

We filled all their “stockings” and had circle jerks,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

A huge snort of cocaine billowed up and rose;

Then he sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all pranced like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, CASH AND CHECKS ARE ALL-RIGHT!"

Happy December, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.

Upset Jew, 12-03-2018



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37342568)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:00 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343357)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:04 PM
Author: Mind-boggling Onyx Property Personal Credit Line

TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy this pity bump as my Chanukah present to you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343380)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:10 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

ty!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343413)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:16 PM
Author: At-the-ready parlor

jfc, this was 180.

This is why I continue to visit this demented chatbort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343471)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:53 PM
Author: curious idiotic tattoo corner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43670143)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: arousing mewling space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343477)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: Exciting indian lodge mediation



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343484)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Lavender Knife



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Jet-lagged lodge round eye



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343515)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: At-the-ready parlor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37343539)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37367063)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:39 AM
Author: Vibrant avocado home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37367091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:50 AM
Author: domesticated hissy fit tanning salon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37367151)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: green irate factory reset button



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37367159)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:55 AM
Author: Slippery Temple Quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37367178)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:12 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37407273)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:15 PM
Author: Unhinged striped hyena wrinkle



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37407292)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: arousing mewling space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462612)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:41 AM
Author: beady-eyed brindle athletic conference



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462615)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:44 AM
Author: Swollen aphrodisiac multi-billionaire native

To be fair,

What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vulgar and sexually explicit manner for “laughs”? Why I’ve never

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462619)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:52 AM
Author: sooty insecure orchestra pit faggot firefighter

120

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 7:44 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37465688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:47 AM
Author: sooty insecure orchestra pit faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462629)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:54 AM
Author: mauve blathering public bath roommate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462649)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:46 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37462815)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:02 PM
Author: hairraiser anal gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37465757)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: Spruce fragrant legal warrant gas station

Artistic gold tyvmft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37466002)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 12:45 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43619656)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:30 PM
Author: Autistic plum cumskin new version



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37466012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: frum locale pistol



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37466032)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: electric citrine electric furnace den

this was pretty good, nice work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#37466049)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

~*Christmas in July bump*~

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#38469719)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: arousing mewling space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#38469721)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: arousing mewling space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#38469720)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2019 9:37 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

Early December Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39241607)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2019 12:21 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

getting close...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39297740)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:18 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

ding ding ding

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39316620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:38 AM
Author: Razzmatazz Associate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39316668)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:42 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317383)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:49 AM
Author: soul-stirring pit antidepressant drug



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:52 AM
Author: Passionate Son Of Senegal Shrine

This deserves more bumps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317415)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:07 AM
Author: Slap-happy Snowy Community Account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:14 AM
Author: Spruce fragrant legal warrant gas station

lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:57 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39318060)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:54 PM
Author: curious idiotic tattoo corner

This

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43670148)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:30 AM
Author: Ungodly violent site mexican

Missed this the first time. Great work dude.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39317610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:58 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

ty, labor of love

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39318062)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:02 AM
Author: Vivacious pocket flask



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39318085)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:51 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39318318)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 1:48 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

lube up your chimneys!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39318901)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:19 PM
Author: curious idiotic tattoo corner

pure gold 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39319682)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 5:57 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39320155)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:29 PM
Author: arrogant crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#39319749)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2020 2:54 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#41553760)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 23rd, 2020 1:37 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#41603653)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 8:07 AM
Author: Cracking church sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#41608882)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:14 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

It's time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#41610330)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:19 PM
Author: domesticated hissy fit tanning salon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#41610375)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43618689)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:32 AM
Author: mauve blathering public bath roommate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43619119)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: Cracking church sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43619130)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:21 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab

Chri$tmas $pirit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43643241)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:27 PM
Author: overrated philosopher-king candlestick maker

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43643299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 5:59 PM
Author: burgundy nowag rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43658914)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 6:53 PM
Author: overrated philosopher-king candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43659259)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:49 PM
Author: big turquoise karate abode



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#43670127)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2023 11:04 AM
Author: curious idiotic tattoo corner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#47211358)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: grown men with poopy butt cracks



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#49538706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:10 AM
Author: nude butt cheeks (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#49538932)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:14 AM
Author: constantscreen the great



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310751#49538935)