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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
out-of-control office international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
b!
alcoholic theater stage stock car
  12/29/15
C
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
c
soul-stirring cruise ship
  12/29/15
a
Boyish Arrogant Useless Brakes
  12/29/15
a
Vivacious Splenetic Roommate
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
alcoholic theater stage stock car
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
out-of-control office international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
alcoholic theater stage stock car
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
buff hairraiser market
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
?
buff hairraiser market
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
out-of-control office international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
c for sure
buff hairraiser market
  12/29/15
C
Vivacious Splenetic Roommate
  12/29/15
c
topaz stag film gunner
  12/29/15
Xo
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Mentally Impaired Chapel Queen Of The Night
  12/30/15
C!
alcoholic theater stage stock car
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
alcoholic theater stage stock car
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
titillating national security agency
  12/29/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/29/15
...
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
topaz stag film gunner
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Alcoholic Deranged Shrine Lettuce
  12/29/15
lol ouch
fragrant citrine dilemma
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
buff hairraiser market
  12/29/15
...
provocative stead
  12/30/15
...
histrionic gas station ratface
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
grizzly very tactful french chef
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
out-of-control office international law enforcement agency
  12/30/15
2
fragrant citrine dilemma
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
grizzly very tactful french chef
  12/30/15
police
Mentally Impaired Chapel Queen Of The Night
  12/30/15
1
Vivacious Splenetic Roommate
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  12/30/15
...
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  01/02/16
4 and 180
topaz stag film gunner
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
topaz stag film gunner
  12/30/15
...
sinister costumed school cafeteria
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
brilliant passionate giraffe
  01/11/16
...
soggy point
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
odious spot affirmative action
  11/05/20
...
Excitant range
  12/13/25
...
underhanded slate area black woman
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: out-of-control office international law enforcement agency

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: alcoholic theater stage stock car

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: soul-stirring cruise ship

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Boyish Arrogant Useless Brakes

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Vivacious Splenetic Roommate

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: alcoholic theater stage stock car

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: out-of-control office international law enforcement agency

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: alcoholic theater stage stock car

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: buff hairraiser market

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: buff hairraiser market

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: out-of-control office international law enforcement agency

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: buff hairraiser market

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Vivacious Splenetic Roommate

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: topaz stag film gunner

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Mentally Impaired Chapel Queen Of The Night

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: alcoholic theater stage stock car

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: alcoholic theater stage stock car

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: titillating national security agency

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: topaz stag film gunner

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Alcoholic Deranged Shrine Lettuce

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: fragrant citrine dilemma

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: buff hairraiser market

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: provocative stead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: histrionic gas station ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: grizzly very tactful french chef

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: out-of-control office international law enforcement agency

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: fragrant citrine dilemma

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: grizzly very tactful french chef

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Mentally Impaired Chapel Queen Of The Night

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Vivacious Splenetic Roommate

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: topaz stag film gunner

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: topaz stag film gunner

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: sinister costumed school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: brilliant passionate giraffe

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: soggy point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: odious spot affirmative action

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: Excitant range



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: underhanded slate area black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310764",#41284137)