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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre
  12/29/15
b!
Dark Sexy Pozpig
  12/29/15
C
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
c
Rose Razzle Degenerate Jewess
  12/29/15
a
Big godawful patrolman
  12/29/15
a
rusted codepig heaven
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Dark Sexy Pozpig
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Dark Sexy Pozpig
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
At-the-ready address persian
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
?
At-the-ready address persian
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
c for sure
At-the-ready address persian
  12/29/15
C
rusted codepig heaven
  12/29/15
c
internet-worthy hominid
  12/29/15
Xo
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Up-to-no-good pisswyrm
  12/30/15
C!
Dark Sexy Pozpig
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Dark Sexy Pozpig
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
light idea he suggested
  12/29/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/29/15
...
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
internet-worthy hominid
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Apoplectic orchestra pit place of business
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Tripping french range
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
At-the-ready address persian
  12/29/15
...
violet parlor generalized bond
  12/30/15
...
rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
Onyx fat ankles
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre
  12/30/15
2
Tripping french range
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
Onyx fat ankles
  12/30/15
police
Up-to-no-good pisswyrm
  12/30/15
1
rusted codepig heaven
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  12/30/15
...
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  01/02/16
4 and 180
internet-worthy hominid
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
internet-worthy hominid
  12/30/15
...
mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
amethyst site
  01/11/16
...
charcoal circlehead
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Olive excitant library therapy
  11/05/20
...
fantasy-prone black giraffe
  12/13/25
...
Crusty public bath
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Dark Sexy Pozpig

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Rose Razzle Degenerate Jewess

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Big godawful patrolman

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: rusted codepig heaven

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Dark Sexy Pozpig

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Dark Sexy Pozpig

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: At-the-ready address persian

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: At-the-ready address persian

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: At-the-ready address persian

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: rusted codepig heaven

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: internet-worthy hominid

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Up-to-no-good pisswyrm

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Dark Sexy Pozpig

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Dark Sexy Pozpig

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: light idea he suggested

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: internet-worthy hominid

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Apoplectic orchestra pit place of business

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Tripping french range

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: At-the-ready address persian

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: violet parlor generalized bond



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: rambunctious burgundy nursing home sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: Onyx fat ankles

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Opaque Theatre

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Tripping french range

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Onyx fat ankles

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Up-to-no-good pisswyrm

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: rusted codepig heaven

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: internet-worthy hominid

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: internet-worthy hominid

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: mildly autistic claret indian lodge cumskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: amethyst site

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: charcoal circlehead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Olive excitant library therapy

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: fantasy-prone black giraffe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: Crusty public bath



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310893#41284137)