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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
b!
Onyx rambunctious school
  12/29/15
C
Flushed queen of the night newt
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
c
free-loading dull skinny woman french chef
  12/29/15
a
Nubile insane address gunner
  12/29/15
a
Chest-beating Associate
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Onyx rambunctious school
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Onyx rambunctious school
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
?
Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
c for sure
Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder
  12/29/15
C
Chest-beating Associate
  12/29/15
c
metal personal credit line piazza
  12/29/15
Xo
Flushed queen of the night newt
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Sticky stag film sneaky criminal
  12/30/15
C!
Onyx rambunctious school
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Onyx rambunctious school
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
brilliant electric sanctuary half-breed
  12/29/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/29/15
...
Flushed queen of the night newt
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
metal personal credit line piazza
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
obsidian abusive kitchen
  12/29/15
lol ouch
fluffy awkward windowlicker
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder
  12/29/15
...
aquamarine razzle corn cake pozpig
  12/30/15
...
Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
low-t heaven nowag
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency
  12/30/15
2
fluffy awkward windowlicker
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
low-t heaven nowag
  12/30/15
police
Sticky stag film sneaky criminal
  12/30/15
1
Chest-beating Associate
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Flushed queen of the night newt
  12/30/15
...
Flushed queen of the night newt
  01/02/16
4 and 180
metal personal credit line piazza
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
metal personal credit line piazza
  12/30/15
...
Flushed queen of the night newt
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Sexy Arousing Hospital
  01/11/16
...
Flirting athletic conference
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
wine degenerate
  11/05/20
...
Rough-skinned Rehab Pistol
  12/13/25
...
bearded alpha
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Onyx rambunctious school

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: free-loading dull skinny woman french chef

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Nubile insane address gunner

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Chest-beating Associate

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Onyx rambunctious school

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Onyx rambunctious school

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Chest-beating Associate

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: metal personal credit line piazza

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Sticky stag film sneaky criminal

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Onyx rambunctious school

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Onyx rambunctious school

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: brilliant electric sanctuary half-breed

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: metal personal credit line piazza

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: obsidian abusive kitchen

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: fluffy awkward windowlicker

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: Salmon Diverse Mental Disorder

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: aquamarine razzle corn cake pozpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: Purple Frum Theater Toilet Seat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: low-t heaven nowag

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Maniacal marvelous senate international law enforcement agency

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: fluffy awkward windowlicker

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: low-t heaven nowag

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Sticky stag film sneaky criminal

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Chest-beating Associate

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: metal personal credit line piazza

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: metal personal credit line piazza

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Flushed queen of the night newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Sexy Arousing Hospital

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: Flirting athletic conference



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: wine degenerate

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: Rough-skinned Rehab Pistol



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: bearded alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2\u0026mark_id=5310906",#41284137)