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Twas the Night Before Christmas (Peterman version)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J ...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/03/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/03/18
TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy ...
kink-friendly idiot theater stage
  12/03/18
ty!
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/03/18
jfc, this was 180. This is why I continue to visit this d...
Tripping Tan Heaven Pervert
  12/03/18
...
Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house
  12/24/21
...
Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting
  12/03/18
...
Flatulent disgusting queen of the night faggot firefighter
  12/03/18
...
iridescent generalized bond trump supporter
  12/03/18
...
Cerise Death Wish
  12/03/18
...
Tripping Tan Heaven Pervert
  12/03/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/07/18
...
Elite Scourge Upon The Earth
  12/07/18
...
soul-stirring private investor
  12/07/18
...
smoky resort roast beef
  12/07/18
...
pearl stubborn half-breed elastic band
  12/07/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/14/18
...
Razzle-dazzle magical principal's office
  12/14/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/18
...
Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting
  12/24/18
...
Razzmatazz submissive hairy legs
  12/24/18
To be fair, What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vu...
Big-titted jet center messiness
  12/24/18
120
Confused brethren
  12/24/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/18
...
Confused brethren
  12/24/18
...
painfully honest racy hall cuck
  12/24/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/18
...
Aromatic pit coffee pot
  12/24/18
Artistic gold tyvmft
Harsh Rehab
  12/24/18
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/16/21
...
Boyish background story
  12/24/18
...
Clear alpha
  12/24/18
this was pretty good, nice work
Alcoholic degenerate
  12/24/18
~*Christmas in July bump*~
Electric Kitchen Azn
  07/01/19
...
Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting
  07/01/19
...
Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting
  07/01/19
Early December Bump
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/10/19
getting close...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/20/19
ding ding ding
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
...
glittery theater becky
  12/24/19
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
...
judgmental soggy boiling water international law enforcement agency
  12/24/19
This deserves more bumps.
sienna sanctuary legal warrant
  12/24/19
...
Histrionic Sandwich Puppy
  12/24/19
lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180
Harsh Rehab
  12/24/19
lol
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
This
Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house
  12/24/21
Missed this the first time. Great work dude. 180
Adulterous school cafeteria
  12/24/19
ty, labor of love
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
...
lake plaza
  12/24/19
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
lube up your chimneys!
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
pure gold 180
Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house
  12/24/19
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/19
...
rose bawdyhouse stock car
  12/24/19
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/15/20
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/23/20
...
Aphrodisiac Bearded Church Building Clown
  12/24/20
It's time.
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/24/20
...
soul-stirring private investor
  12/24/20
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/16/21
...
painfully honest racy hall cuck
  12/16/21
...
Aphrodisiac Bearded Church Building Clown
  12/16/21
Chri$tmas $pirit
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/20/21
Lmao
marvelous citrine candlestick maker
  12/20/21
...
Electric Kitchen Azn
  12/22/21
...
marvelous citrine candlestick maker
  12/22/21
...
Maroon Menage Corn Cake
  12/24/21
...
Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house
  12/25/23
...
grown men with poopy butt cracks
  12/25/25
...
nude butt cheeks
  12/25/25
...
constantscreen the great
  12/25/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J

Lots of truckers were hungry, much like any old day;

The rig pigs were hung, taking dick pics with care,

In hopes that St. Peterman soon would be there;

The truckers were horny, dicks throbbing and red ,

While visions of Peter’s plums danced in their heads;

And Earl in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down longing for Peterman’s gap,

When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the truck to see what was the matter.

Away to the lot I flew like a flash,

Tore open my zipper in hope of fresh gash.

The moon on the breast of the softly lit J

Made the lot lizards glow, all looking to play,

When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a beady-eyed Peterman, and eight tiny trans-queers,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this night would be sick.

More rapid than eagles out their trousers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, FLASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, ROCKET ! on CUPID! on, BONER and SHITZEN!

To the back of the truck! to the top of the wall!

Now suck away! suck away! fuck away all!"

As lubed holes that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with a cock, were mounted to the sky,

So up to the truck-stops the trans-queers they flew,

With the sleigh full of boys, and St. Peterman too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little poof.

As he jerked with his hand, and was turning around,

“Stuff my chimney!” said St. Peterman on the ground.

He was dressed all in latex, from his head to his foot,

His knees were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of dildos he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just lifting his sac.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his boihole like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin had cum white as snow;

The stump of my pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And his lips did encircle its head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

His broad backside shook like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

We filled all their “stockings” and had circle jerks,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

A huge snort of cocaine billowed up and rose;

Then he sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all pranced like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, CASH AND CHECKS ARE ALL-RIGHT!"

Happy December, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.

Upset Jew, 12-03-2018



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37342568)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:00 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343357)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:04 PM
Author: kink-friendly idiot theater stage

TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy this pity bump as my Chanukah present to you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343380)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:10 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

ty!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343413)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:16 PM
Author: Tripping Tan Heaven Pervert

jfc, this was 180.

This is why I continue to visit this demented chatbort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343471)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:53 PM
Author: Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43670143)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343477)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: Flatulent disgusting queen of the night faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343484)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: iridescent generalized bond trump supporter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Cerise Death Wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343515)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: Tripping Tan Heaven Pervert



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37343539)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37367063)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:39 AM
Author: Elite Scourge Upon The Earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37367091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:50 AM
Author: soul-stirring private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37367151)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: smoky resort roast beef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37367159)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:55 AM
Author: pearl stubborn half-breed elastic band



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37367178)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:12 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37407273)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:15 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle magical principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37407292)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462612)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:41 AM
Author: Razzmatazz submissive hairy legs



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462615)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:44 AM
Author: Big-titted jet center messiness

To be fair,

What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vulgar and sexually explicit manner for “laughs”? Why I’ve never

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462619)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:52 AM
Author: Confused brethren

120

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 7:44 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37465688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:47 AM
Author: Confused brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462629)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:54 AM
Author: painfully honest racy hall cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462649)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:46 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37462815)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:02 PM
Author: Aromatic pit coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37465757)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: Harsh Rehab

Artistic gold tyvmft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37466002)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 12:45 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43619656)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:30 PM
Author: Boyish background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37466012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: Clear alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37466032)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: Alcoholic degenerate

this was pretty good, nice work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#37466049)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

~*Christmas in July bump*~

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#38469719)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#38469721)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Free-loading Famous Landscape Painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#38469720)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2019 9:37 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

Early December Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39241607)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2019 12:21 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

getting close...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39297740)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:18 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

ding ding ding

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39316620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:38 AM
Author: glittery theater becky



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39316668)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:42 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317383)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:49 AM
Author: judgmental soggy boiling water international law enforcement agency



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:52 AM
Author: sienna sanctuary legal warrant

This deserves more bumps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317415)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:07 AM
Author: Histrionic Sandwich Puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:14 AM
Author: Harsh Rehab

lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:57 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39318060)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:54 PM
Author: Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house

This

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43670148)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:30 AM
Author: Adulterous school cafeteria

Missed this the first time. Great work dude.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39317610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:58 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

ty, labor of love

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39318062)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:02 AM
Author: lake plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39318085)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:51 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39318318)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 1:48 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

lube up your chimneys!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39318901)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:19 PM
Author: Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house

pure gold 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39319682)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 5:57 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39320155)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:29 PM
Author: rose bawdyhouse stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#39319749)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2020 2:54 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#41553760)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 23rd, 2020 1:37 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#41603653)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 8:07 AM
Author: Aphrodisiac Bearded Church Building Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#41608882)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:14 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

It's time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#41610330)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:19 PM
Author: soul-stirring private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#41610375)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43618689)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:32 AM
Author: painfully honest racy hall cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43619119)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: Aphrodisiac Bearded Church Building Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43619130)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:21 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn

Chri$tmas $pirit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43643241)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:27 PM
Author: marvelous citrine candlestick maker

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43643299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 5:59 PM
Author: Electric Kitchen Azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43658914)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 6:53 PM
Author: marvelous citrine candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43659259)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:49 PM
Author: Maroon Menage Corn Cake



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#43670127)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2023 11:04 AM
Author: Trip pisswyrm step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#47211358)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: grown men with poopy butt cracks



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#49538706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:10 AM
Author: nude butt cheeks (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#49538932)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:14 AM
Author: constantscreen the great



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2\u0026show=today#49538935)