Date: December 9th, 2023 11:35 PM
Author: bateful wrinkle mood
1. Choose opposing counsels who are shitty. Constantly tell the world how shitty your opposing counsel is. Never suggest that you're matching wits against a competent lawyer. You're not even sure they exist because you've only ever seen one in the mirror, and you don't really know how mirrors work or whether they tell the truth.
2. Claim that your victories reflect your talent as a lawyer, not the shittiness of the shitty opposing counsel who doesn't know shit and failed to turn over some shit in discovery and represents a criminal syndicate that can't hide it's tracks.