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HYPO: Ronaldo free kicks from 50 yards, you are goalie. Each missed goal = $1mm

For context, here's a 40 yard free kick from "years&quo...
the discombobulator
  06/13/26
under no circumstances do I take this, no no NO big fat hard...
COCKazn
  06/13/26
so i either get 23 million or lose my virginity to a wife?
concern boner
  06/13/26
So either I get 23 million or a guaranteed retirement even w...
Hodd Toward
  06/13/26
...
Bellevue therapy dog tp
  06/13/26
I'd sooner let a child take 5 potshots at me from 100 yds us...
esoteric sambo
  06/13/26
50 yards seems pretty far. I am leaning yes but need to see ...
Fucking Fuckface
  06/13/26
Just looked it up. Sign me up to defend the goal
Fucking Fuckface
  06/13/26
180
Bellevue therapy dog tp
  06/13/26
Straight male here tp
Bellevue therapy dog tp
  06/13/26
6’4” Jamaican National Team goalie couldn’...
concern boner
  06/13/26
Struggling with whether I should feel murderous rage to be c...
Fucking Fuckface
  06/13/26
What’s in it for Ronaldo? If nothing, I can see him ge...
Big Bear Energy
  06/13/26
excellent reading comprehension lolyer
esoteric sambo
  06/13/26


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Date: June 13th, 2026 10:15 AM
Author: the discombobulator

For context, here's a 40 yard free kick from "years" ago that a pro can't stop.

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/JKnFHJFf4AE

He has 11 kicks from straight on, 50 yards out, no other players on the pitch except you in goal wearing standard goalie kit.

If he scores no more than 5 goals, you get $23 million taxed as ordinary income.

If he gets 6 goals or more, you have to work until age 70 going into office 5 days/week wearing dress shirt and tie, max 2 weeks vacation, and will have to live in the northern great plains states in retirement on a max $55k/year, no other accumulating assets or using ur wife's vacation home or other shit.

If you accept, you are transplanted to standard local college pitch and Ronaldo starts kicking in 10 minutes. Do you take the hypo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935491)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:08 AM
Author: COCKazn (✅🍑)

under no circumstances do I take this, no no NO big fat hard NO

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935545)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:50 AM
Author: concern boner

so i either get 23 million or lose my virginity to a wife?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935597)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:52 AM
Author: Hodd Toward (🧐)

So either I get 23 million or a guaranteed retirement even when nobody else has a job in 30 years? Sounds cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935599)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:57 AM
Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935617)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:54 AM
Author: esoteric sambo

I'd sooner let a child take 5 potshots at me from 100 yds using ironsights

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935607)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:57 AM
Author: Fucking Fuckface

50 yards seems pretty far. I am leaning yes but need to see how big a goal is and if I can jump high enough to cover the upper region

Straight male here. Obviously don't watch or know anything about soccer

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935616)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:04 PM
Author: Fucking Fuckface

Just looked it up. Sign me up to defend the goal

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935632)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:06 PM
Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935641)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:06 PM
Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp

Straight male here tp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935640)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:08 PM
Author: concern boner

6’4” Jamaican National Team goalie couldn’t do it: https://youtu.be/E-4MNTyn7yU

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935646)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 1:08 PM
Author: Fucking Fuckface

Struggling with whether I should feel murderous rage to be compared to a Jamaican or exquisite bliss to be compared to a 6'4" motherfucker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935843)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:16 PM
Author: Big Bear Energy

What’s in it for Ronaldo? If nothing, I can see him getting bored and not trying that hard. If there’s a camera on him or there’s a check on the line, he’d score 45/50.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935666)



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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:23 PM
Author: esoteric sambo

excellent reading comprehension lolyer

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2Firm#49935683)