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Donald Rumsfeld Writes Like a Biglaw Partner
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: April 7th, 2015 11:23 PM Author: Diverse principal's office hominid April 7, 2003 11:46 AM TO: Doug Feith FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: Issues w/Various Countries
We need more coercive diplomacy with respect to Syria and Libya, and we need it fast. If they mess up Iraq, it will delay bringing our troops home.
We also need to solve the Pakistan problem.
And Korea doesnt seem to be going well.
Are you coming up with proposals for me to send around?
Thanks.
http://library.rumsfeld.com/doclib/sp/1686/2003-04-07%20to%20Doug%20Feith%20re%20Issues%20with%20Various%20Countries.pdf |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 12:51 AM Author: Brindle wrinkle address Doug Feith to jr. associate:
FW: Issues w/Various Countries
pls handle |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:10 AM Author: Stubborn pervert casino Associate emails secretary for some help:
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:04 AM Author: wild thriller garrison One could almost get the impression that our leaders (both Secretaries of Defense and Partners) have no comprehension whatsoever of the underlying issues (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27646025) |
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Date: December 18th, 2016 3:37 AM Author: Impressive galvanic native Or they hunt and peck type and can't be bothered to fully express themselves via email. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#32170344) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:11 AM Author: Stubborn pervert casino lol xoxo Franks
"General Tommy Franks, who led both the 2001 invasion of Afghanistan and the Iraq War, once called Feith "the dumbest fucking guy on the planet."" |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 7:57 AM Author: slimy toaster Not flame: https://books.google.com/books?id=FHn-M8fZ96MC&pg=PT160&lpg=PT160&dq=dumbest+bastard+doug+feith&source=bl&ots=9Wzjio1gTY&sig=Kie1hQeDIgPyxQUCMdtaFjchLvk&hl=en&sa=X&ei=bRclVfqPGIWTsAXB1YCADQ&ved=0CCAQ6AEwAQ (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27647189) |
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Date: April 11th, 2015 11:17 AM Author: copper giraffe the emphasis is a little more entertaining:
Franks ROUTINELY denounced Feith as: "the dumbest bastard, dumbest motherfucker on the face of the earth"
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:15 AM Author: Wine floppy roommate Under appreciated in this trove of 180s is the absurd subject line SUBJECT: Issues w/Various Countries |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:19 AM Author: Stubborn pervert casino It's the bow that ties this together as senior partner style.
The only thing more fitting would be if the subject was just "POLICY" |
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Date: November 26th, 2025 3:13 PM Author: Reinhard Heydrich Uunona (✅🍑) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#49463313) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:24 AM Author: coral rebellious coffee pot point Where are we on the siege of Fallujah? We know how hard you've all been working but we really need this done by COB tomorrow. Thanks. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27646109) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:44 AM Author: Talented round eye & he's almost as proliferous.
in that morris doc about him they say at one point that he wrote like 20,000 fucking memos when he was SOD.
20,000. |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:46 AM Author: Charismatic Elite Gas Station Water Buffalo So? I know people who've written 30k tweets. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27646202) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:48 AM Author: Talented round eye dope (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27646209) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:33 PM Author: razzle-dazzle lavender persian (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27648975) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:03 AM Author: Coiffed mad-dog skullcap temple (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27646250) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 10:03 AM Author: Drab bipolar senate circlehead Winston Churchill was famous for sending out hundreds of requests like this for updates on weapon designs, campaign planning, recruitment, etc.
The merciful difference is that all replies were required to fit on one page because Churchill actually read all of them. |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:49 PM Author: Wine floppy roommate Biggest difference is that Churchill was a mother fuckin boss while Rummy was a faggot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649080) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 1:50 PM Author: free-loading black woman Rumsfeld is pretty fucking alpha bro. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649089) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:01 PM Author: Wine floppy roommate Alphas can be faggots too (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649171) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 5:10 PM Author: abnormal puce idiot jap Indeed. He began many of these memos with "Pray tell me..., Pray explain," "Pray, etc..." I start my emails this way. If it's good enough for WSC, it's good enough for me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27650714) |
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Date: November 26th, 2025 3:14 PM Author: Reinhard Heydrich Uunona (✅🍑) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#49463314) |
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Date: January 12th, 2023 12:36 PM Author: embarrassed to the bone lascivious son of senegal uh, that sounds pretty different. sounds like he was sending out detailed requests about specific issues, as opposed to "Look into how we can get some troops onto continental Europe" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#45778706) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:04 PM Author: cracking background story cruise ship It's amazing to me that this level of official actually does send emails like this that are so straightforward about such broad, macro issues. It's like, if you saw a movie where someone playing the Secretary of Defense sent an email like this, or said it over the phone ("I need an update on the situation in Syria, dammit!"), you'd roll your eyes because you'd assume it's not a realistic portrayal of what must surely be much more nuanced, detailed discussion IRL at those levels. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649194) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:33 PM Author: vigorous doobsian keepsake machete (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649365) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:34 PM Author: stirring topaz pit mental disorder protip: this is how all high-level doods operate. the emperor truly has no clothes. everybody is faking it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649377) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:36 PM Author: slimy toaster Bush literally was unaware that there were Sunni and Shiite Muslims in Iraq b4 the invasion. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649396) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:37 PM Author: stirring topaz pit mental disorder I mean more like CEOs and shit too. For every Steve Jobs there's probably 20 dipshits writing "Sales #s low, sales up plz. BIGBONUS if u do." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649405) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:38 PM Author: slimy toaster (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649414) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:21 PM Author: Seedy milk hospital lol I've read emails in discovery related to employment lawsuits. These type of emails are common from higher ups to sales people (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649757) |
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Date: April 17th, 2015 11:33 PM Author: twisted milky office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27711000) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:55 PM Author: henna ladyboy Ljl. Link to this Michael Moore/Daily Kos level retard drivel. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649539) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:10 PM Author: slimy toaster https://books.google.com/books?id=AMeZaKeV4qYC&pg=PA83&lpg=PP1&focus=viewport&output=html_text (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649693) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:38 PM Author: henna ladyboy More direct of a source than I would have thought but still lol at that Howard Dean lackey. I'm sure Bush might not have had a deep understanding of shia and sunni in Iraq but to say he was "unfamiliar with these terms" is just lolzy. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649879) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:52 PM Author: yellow boyish ape TO: Joint Chiefs FROM: George W. Bush (heh) SUBJECT: RE: Iraq War Diligence
Cheney told me something about a shia and a sunni? Please research and report back.
Thank. |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 4:34 PM Author: slimy toaster Twist: this was way more due diligence than he actually did. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27650343) |
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Date: April 11th, 2015 10:24 AM Author: slimy toaster i guess this is as close as you come to admitting that you were wrong. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27669870) |
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Date: April 17th, 2015 10:02 PM Author: slimy toaster why did racist party bro / idris elba's alt go pumo? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27710635) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:35 PM Author: slimy toaster Cr (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649391) |
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Date: January 12th, 2023 12:39 PM Author: histrionic half-breed I realized this at some point during my early 20’s and it changed the way I look @ the world. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#45778731) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:33 PM Author: vigorous doobsian keepsake machete Sounds like he'd be a pain to work for (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649370) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 2:52 PM Author: Razzmatazz theater That's because he'd probably be one had he opted for law school instead of business. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649519) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:23 PM Author: rambunctious french library mexican He went to GULC but never graduated. Wasn't aware he went to b-school. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649769) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:12 PM Author: Razzmatazz theater He'd probably be a V5 partner if he didn't go into biz/politics. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649708) |
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Date: April 8th, 2015 3:42 PM Author: mint hell One time the senior associate and I wrote up a list of tasks for a big new matter, with due dates, and sent it to the partner as our suggestions. He called us in separately and chewed us out for usurping his authority. About a week later his long-time paralegal showed us the task memo he had written at the same time we wrote ours, but he hadn't distributed it once he saw ours. The first entry was "identify key issues and write memoranda thereon." We almost died laughing. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27649924) |
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Date: April 11th, 2015 10:05 AM Author: slimy toaster Estimate this man's dick size. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27669810) |
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MANY more details and further stories are required |
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Date: April 17th, 2015 9:44 PM Author: mint hell He was a Chauncey Gardner. He looked and sounded noble but once you figured it out, you realized he had an IQ of 95. He had impressive facial expressions and hand gestures. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27710510) |
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Date: November 26th, 2025 3:16 PM Author: Reinhard Heydrich Uunona (✅🍑) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#49463319) |
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Date: April 11th, 2015 10:57 AM Author: bossy windowlicker depressive April 7, 2003 11:48 AM
TO: Donald Rumsfeld
FROM: Doug Feith
SUBJECT: Issues w/Various Countries
Will do. Thank
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Date: April 27th, 2015 10:13 AM Author: Razzle splenetic crackhouse national security agency This sort of reinforces my impression of the Bush administration as being led by amateurs at the top. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27769352) |
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Date: May 8th, 2015 4:56 AM Author: Aromatic Love Of Her Life (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#27847114) |
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Date: May 8th, 2015 9:55 PM Author: Maize swollen kitchen police squad Defense Department underling who's been watching the clock all Friday afternoon finally gets to 4:48. Two more minutes and he's out of there.
He starts whistling as he hovers his mouse over the Start button, ready to click Start, then Log Off. He pictures the vast weekend ahead of him. Drunk tonight. Sleeping in tomorrow. Shuffling around in a bathrobe until it's time to go chase the hunnies on the DC rooftop scene.
4:49. He starts to do the WWF Bushwhacker walk from a sitting position at his desk. He's so pumped.
4:50. Time to go! See ya, suckas! Just before he can click Start, he notices an Outlook notification of a new email. Fwd: Issues w/Various Countries.
Wtf. He opens it. "Need to see something on this by Monday morning. Thanks." |
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Date: August 1st, 2015 1:22 PM Author: Aromatic Love Of Her Life (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#28456516) |
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Date: August 1st, 2015 1:30 PM Author: Aquamarine titillating business firm This thread made me laugh out loud, and then dry-heave with anxiety (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#28456573) |
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Date: December 18th, 2015 11:43 AM Author: Aromatic Love Of Her Life once you stop caring only the laughing will happen :) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2850072&forum_id=2Firm#29407308) |
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Date: January 24th, 2018 5:52 PM Author: drunken bawdyhouse To: Paul Wolfowitz
CC: Doug Feith, Steve Cambone
From: Donald H. Rumsfeld
Date: November 23rd 2001
Re: Lists
We ought to think through what are the bad things that could happen, and what are the good things that could happen that we need to be ready for in both respects. Please give me a list of each.
Thanks,
https://assets.documentcloud.org/documents/4357755/11-L-0559-First-Release-Bates-1-912.pdf#page=634
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