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100 In-House Job Apps; <><><>NO OFFERS<><><>

There should be a job store or something. Job hunting is ex...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
white male?
Excitant State
  12/07/22
Yes. Should I refuse to answer their exclusionary and divis...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
in house is almost exclusively female now. but if youre seri...
Excitant State
  12/07/22
Lame. Everything is remote now too, which fucking sucks b/c...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
A lot of companies say they're collecting that data for purp...
electric toilet seat milk
  12/07/22
have u considered that ur interviewers (including the person...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
They still see you face on zoom. What you put in app may not...
Beady-eyed hilarious senate
  12/07/22
Shoe polish
180 misunderstood center ratface
  03/18/23
Any mid-large size company will only hire women / urm for in...
Metal national
  12/07/22
I made it three rounds with this really cool company, but th...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
You were born with every advantage in life. Sorry bro for yo...
Startled Indirect Expression Circlehead
  12/08/22
If you’re not inhouse already it’s really tough....
Offensive police squad headpube
  12/07/22
its easy as shit if youre a woman they waltz in and out of t...
Excitant State
  12/07/22
I was addressing OP on the assumption he’s a straight ...
Offensive police squad headpube
  12/07/22
i'm in-house and yeah you either need to know someone or not...
salmon mind-boggling house
  12/07/22
I might join the military for 5 yrs just so I can check a bo...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
Ur too old to join the military
vermilion stimulating pozpig range
  12/07/22
Active Duty: Be under the age of 42 at the time of entry int...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
If you want to do this then good for you. If you expect tha...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
I need to check a box, man!! I don't want to suck dicks just...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
You're not going to get hired just because of that box. Whe...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
I have +7 yrs of tranny experience. Both general corp + spe...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
jfc this gives me no hoap
mustard bat-shit-crazy bbw
  12/07/22
Also, people don't like being people more prestigious / smar...
Metal national
  12/07/22
have you been reaching out to your clients about jorbs? that...
salmon mind-boggling house
  12/07/22
That's the problem - a lot of this experience isn't what in-...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
nothing about you stands out you're not even a gay nigger
Harsh jap station
  12/07/22
Ur too old. No one will believe you want to go in-house. Y...
Galvanic selfie office
  12/07/22
LOL no this is not the job market equivalent of yield protec...
Laughsome wrinkle tank
  12/07/22
"This could change somewhat as layoffs gain steam and p...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
Put your head down, grind, and either hope a client you actu...
Laughsome wrinkle tank
  12/07/22
I'm going to offer something else, not that racial/gender di...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
world's changed since then
Excitant State
  12/07/22
The last person I hired was a white Christian guy. Granted,...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
all of the women i know from t14ls have waltzed in and out o...
Excitant State
  12/07/22
I work for a white guy, worked for another white guy before....
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
+90% of all legal departments are just white people LJL
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
Not at companies with composed of 30 somethings
Metal national
  12/07/22
I wouldn't go that far. Next level up is an Asian female. ...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
...
appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort
  12/07/22
cr if you’re in some specialized biglaw niche, you ca...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
Your first job is almost certainly going to be at the bottom...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
i copped a good title straight off the bat, can be done mate
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
We don't even hire into good titles unless it is someone tha...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
5 years and 11000 billable hours later: Reply Favorite D...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
this is true. companies are truly retarded with hiring. you ...
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
It becomes less retarded when you realize that they're flood...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
same path here, ground floor to something with an effort/rew...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
it's much easier once you break in.
Passionate Painfully Honest Library Community Account
  12/07/22
100 apps are rookie numbers. Keep pushing. Took me like 1000...
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
That is true.
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
You can do it. I interviewed at every major company in the c...
Slippery Zombie-like Point Regret
  12/07/22
I knew a bird brain Asian woman who worked in M&A and di...
wonderful lake party of the first part
  12/07/22
we all know nutella dude
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
...
wonderful lake party of the first part
  12/07/22
I applied to like 200 in house jobs, got interviewed at like...
Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus
  12/07/22
I forgot you're in California where the state actively hates...
wonderful lake party of the first part
  12/07/22
You must be a new poster if you don’t know about my po...
Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus
  12/07/22
...
contagious mood quadroon
  12/07/22
While all good and well, California is great from an in-hous...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
...
White bonkers public bath
  12/07/22
...
Slimy cuckoldry principal's office
  12/08/22
It's rough out there lately and will soon be worse
Fantasy-prone Twinkling Sneaky Criminal
  12/07/22
I probably applied to 25 in house roles, got 4 interviews an...
appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort
  12/07/22
have you tried omitting your xo moniker from your resume?
Well-lubricated indecent jew set
  12/07/22
Not cool man. At least give the guy a fighting chance.
Beady-eyed hilarious senate
  12/07/22
What are the odds the blue-haired trans freaks over at U.S. ...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
you miss all the shots you dont take lad
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
...
Vibrant reading party
  12/07/22
While it doesn't hurt to apply your chances are roughly 0.
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
Are you putting your religion and gun ownership on resumes? ...
appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort
  12/07/22
COVID-19 Vaccination U.S. Soccer has mandated the Covid-1...
Silver Boistinker
  12/08/22
What are the in house prospects for Asian and Jew dudes?
maniacal trump supporter weed whacker
  12/07/22
congrats, honorary white males (unless the department needs ...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
group leaders often have specific KPIs to "increase DEI...
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
true, and the degree to which it’s true seems to scal...
emerald tanning salon
  12/07/22
Real talk, you need to network like crazy, not blind apply. ...
Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus
  12/07/22
AzNGirl who thinks you just apply for jobs and get them as a...
wonderful lake party of the first part
  12/07/22
Azns get no AA points in house or any other jobs, schools et...
Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus
  12/07/22
? she provided good, specific advice
contagious mood quadroon
  12/07/22
"networking" and "asking friends" let...
clear trailer park mediation
  12/07/22
I submitted 541 apps over 5 years, tracked in spreadsheet. ...
Translucent shrine pisswyrm
  12/07/22
Both of his offers?
Galvanic selfie office
  12/07/22
...
Offensive police squad headpube
  12/07/22
...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
...
Slimy cuckoldry principal's office
  12/08/22
...
Dull doobsian volcanic crater
  03/18/23
...
anal purple affirmative action
  03/18/23
how many interviews?
Curious pink parlor keepsake machete
  12/07/22
how was the sex
floppy lettuce
  12/07/22
...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
What job sites do you use?
Lime Soul-stirring Theatre
  12/07/22
not op, but goinhouse.com is pretty good. i got lots of int...
Curious pink parlor keepsake machete
  12/07/22
I recommend LinkedIn.
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
(Loser)
wine effete locus
  12/07/22
http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=4039326&mc=1...
wine effete locus
  12/07/22
In-housmo here, we had a pizza party AND birthday cake today...
Galvanic selfie office
  12/07/22
fuck yeah
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
Do you not have ins w/ any recruiters? I think that's the o...
misanthropic theater
  12/07/22
are you willing to move, or no? it was way harder for me th...
contagious mood quadroon
  12/07/22
"working every angle you've got" http://autoadm...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/07/22
Why do people want to go inhouse? It seems like castrating y...
Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo
  12/07/22
it's a joy to have a life outside of work. i can make plans...
contagious mood quadroon
  12/08/22
I was never biglaw. I work at a small firm.
Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo
  12/08/22
ah, I see -- that sounds alpha af to me. i don't litigate
contagious mood quadroon
  12/08/22
It’s life changing really. Not having to bill hours t...
Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus
  12/08/22
Billing hours isn't bad. I just write down the time I spend ...
Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo
  12/08/22
Billing is a top 3 worst part of a firm job
Vibrant reading party
  12/08/22
Why do people want high paying jobs with reasonable hours an...
Plum self-centered chapel masturbator
  12/10/22
I work around 40 hours a week and make $300k-ish in flyover ...
internet-worthy supple faggotry
  03/18/23
Maybe the problems is that your personality comes through
obsidian school cafeteria legend
  12/07/22
No that’s impossible. As he mentioned he’s a tal...
Diverse Field
  12/08/22
WTF recruiters call me
swollen theater stage therapy
  12/08/22
to switch firms or go inhouse?
contagious mood quadroon
  12/08/22
In house. Never worked a day a firm.
swollen theater stage therapy
  12/10/22
Make your own job, brother. You don't need a work daddy to b...
angry hot brunch mexican
  12/08/22
Are you (a) insulting your wife or (b) implying that women h...
Metal national
  12/08/22
First, in-house jobs are for women. Second, my wife is rich ...
angry hot brunch mexican
  12/09/22
(fwds poast to Paralegal Mohammad)
Disrespectful aqua crotch
  12/10/22
FIRST, WHEN THERE'S NOTHING BUT A SLOW GLOWING DREAM
spectacular cheese-eating box office dysfunction
  03/18/23
YOU CAN DANCE RIGHT THROUGH YOUR LIFE
spectacular cheese-eating box office dysfunction
  03/18/23


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:48 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

There should be a job store or something. Job hunting is exhausting.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598478)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:51 AM
Author: Excitant State

white male?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598485)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:54 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

Yes. Should I refuse to answer their exclusionary and divisive questions?? Or should I just claim trans?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598505)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:56 AM
Author: Excitant State

in house is almost exclusively female now. but if youre serious, yeah you should check something. hispanic or trans or something. no point in just punting off applications.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598511)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:02 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

Lame. Everything is remote now too, which fucking sucks b/c I slay interviews IRL, especially with women. Women love tall, buff Chads. <><><>ZOOM Interviews<><><>

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598528)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 1:02 PM
Author: electric toilet seat milk

A lot of companies say they're collecting that data for purposes of assessing the diversity generally, and it will be kept anonymous and not impact your application. Is that fraudlies?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599207)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 3:48 PM
Author: emerald tanning salon

have u considered that ur interviewers (including the person who ultimately makes the hiring decision) may have the ability to observe that ur male and white/azn without consulting a demographic form

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45600054)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 8:01 PM
Author: Beady-eyed hilarious senate

They still see you face on zoom. What you put in app may not matter but actual diversity will likely give you a boost.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601155)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 18th, 2023 7:38 PM
Author: 180 misunderstood center ratface

Shoe polish

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:57 AM
Author: Metal national

Any mid-large size company will only hire women / urm for in-house roles (excluding GC) now adays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598514)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:00 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

I made it three rounds with this really cool company, but they ended up hiring a black vet instead. I'm a T10-mo, he's a T-100 mo. LJL @ this fraud lies economy. Probably dodged a bullet, tbf.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598524)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 11:40 AM
Author: Startled Indirect Expression Circlehead

You were born with every advantage in life. Sorry bro for you to beat out a T100 black military vet on the merits, you'd have to at least be an astronaut.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603593)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:58 AM
Author: Offensive police squad headpube

If you’re not inhouse already it’s really tough. Aim for smaller places

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598518)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:59 AM
Author: Excitant State

its easy as shit if youre a woman they waltz in and out of those jobs all the time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598521)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:56 AM
Author: Offensive police squad headpube

I was addressing OP on the assumption he’s a straight white male

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598831)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 10:59 AM
Author: salmon mind-boggling house

i'm in-house and yeah you either need to know someone or not be a white d00d. very hard to get hired just applying.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598520)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:01 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

I might join the military for 5 yrs just so I can check a box for the rest of my life and get guaranteed interviews... Lots of consider ...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598526)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:03 AM
Author: vermilion stimulating pozpig range

Ur too old to join the military

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598534)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:05 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

Active Duty: Be under the age of 42 at the time of entry into the JAG Corps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598541)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:09 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

If you want to do this then good for you. If you expect that this will cause you to get hired just because of this then I would think again.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598564)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:15 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

I need to check a box, man!! I don't want to suck dicks just to get hired.,

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598584)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:18 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

You're not going to get hired just because of that box. When I think of people that "check the box" at my company they still have a bunch of very direct experience AND have a box they checked. XO is very into one weird trick to getting into schools/jobs/etc. Here, it rarely works like that. I remember when I got in-house XO was assuring me that I was totally fucked and should probably leave law altogether.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598603)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:20 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

I have +7 yrs of tranny experience. Both general corp + specific subfield. Lots of finance/lending/borrowing xp too. Graduated from T10 w/ A- average. I'm not a slouch. Hiring could be very slow right now due to holidays/economy, or my lack of special-snowflake status is leading to <><><>NO OFFERS<><><>

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598618)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:24 AM
Author: mustard bat-shit-crazy bbw

jfc this gives me no hoap

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598637)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:26 AM
Author: Metal national

Also, people don't like being people more prestigious / smarter than they are.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598650)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:34 AM
Author: salmon mind-boggling house

have you been reaching out to your clients about jorbs? that's really the only way to do it as a white d00d

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598697)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:43 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

That's the problem - a lot of this experience isn't what in-house really cares about. They want tech trans, privacy, etc. Banks have their own set of specific regulations so if you really know those then you might have more luck there. That's not my area but Are Reptile might be able to talk about that if he's around.

No one cares about your T10 w/A- average. I don't even know what law school my boss graduated from. I know people out of HYS and people out of no-name law schools. One of our legal execs came to talk about her path up and she literally started as a doc review temp. In-house is overwhelmingly NOT like prestigious law firms. Yeah, I'm out of a T14 but that's not what got me here. They cared more about my CS degree than about what law school I went to.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:39 PM
Author: Harsh jap station

nothing about you stands out

you're not even a gay nigger

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599074)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 3:13 PM
Author: Galvanic selfie office

Ur too old. No one will believe you want to go in-house. You need to get hired as a GC.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599863)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 4:10 PM
Author: Laughsome wrinkle tank

LOL no this is not the job market equivalent of yield protection.

There is still just an insatiable demand for cushy in house jobs. The number of resumes we see is insane and while this guy’s stats would put him near the top of a pile he won’t be the best let alone standing out head and shoulders above such that he should be getting offers left and right.

This could change somewhat as layoffs gain steam and people realize how vulnerable lawyers who are cost centers can be, but of course when that happens hiring will also fall off a cliff so probably no way supply catches up to the extreme demand.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45600180)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 8:06 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

"This could change somewhat as layoffs gain steam and people realize how vulnerable lawyers who are cost centers can be, but of course when that happens hiring will also fall off a cliff so probably no way supply catches up to the extreme demand."

Also, what's the alternative for lawyers?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601172)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 9:21 PM
Author: Laughsome wrinkle tank

Put your head down, grind, and either hope a client you actually have a relationship with has a need and hand picks you for it, or keep grinding and plan to retire early.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601551)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:05 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

I'm going to offer something else, not that racial/gender discrimination isn't a real thing against white men. But in general you're going to need a background in something with real demand in-house. It can't be "I did M&A (or God forbid litigation) for 5 years and now want to be in-house."

I got a job in-house just by applying online in 2013. No, I didn't know anyone. I have no charisma to speak of. I do have a strong tech background and skills in areas that they cared about, so they hired me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598545)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:06 AM
Author: Excitant State

world's changed since then

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598549)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:08 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

The last person I hired was a white Christian guy. Granted, already in-house. The thing is that breaking into in-house is really hard because there's a strong preference to hire people already in-house with direct experience related to the role. Getting hired from a law firm is a heavy lift unless you happen to be getting hired for some specialty role and had a bunch of experience in exactly that group ("this is an IP licensing role and I did IP licensing at the firm").

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598562)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:10 AM
Author: Excitant State

all of the women i know from t14ls have waltzed in and out of jobs at their leisure. fedgov, in house at big name companies, ausa. men are either off the grid or grinding out biglaw/midlaw.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598567)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:15 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

I work for a white guy, worked for another white guy before. My wife who is also in-house also works for a white guy. Yes, a lot of women work in-house though part of that is that women are after in-house from day 1. The best time to go in-house is as soon as you get your first in-house offer and many women are going into areas at law firms specifically to get set up to go in-house. A lot of men want to be partners at law firms and then when that doesn't work out then they want to go in-house. The problem is that by then your background isn't as good of a fit and unlike the women they often haven't been setting themselves up for that jump.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598586)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:23 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

+90% of all legal departments are just white people LJL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598633)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:28 AM
Author: Metal national

Not at companies with composed of 30 somethings

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598658)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:30 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

I wouldn't go that far. Next level up is an Asian female. But the excuse of "well, I'm a white guy so I can't possibly get an in-house job" isn't reasonable. Yes, it is harder, yes there's discrimination, but obviously plenty of normal white guys manage anyway.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598672)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:40 AM
Author: appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598729)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:30 AM
Author: emerald tanning salon

cr

if you’re in some specialized biglaw niche, you can either apply to a thousand jobs like ggtp or you can take that shit “corporate counsel” bottom of the totem pole contract churning role that you probably fancy yourself too good for (if you’re of above average intelligence with the drive to survive biglaw, that’s probably fair). we have ip shittigators and M&A refugees doing the latter.

if you want some plum position, you’re going to need either connection/very useful experience or a lot of things to go your way (probably includes the diverse/female candidates, and there will be several, practically radiating their inability to do the job or being unwilling to take the pay cut).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598671)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:34 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

Your first job is almost certainly going to be at the bottom with a title like "corporate counsel" or "associate counsel" to get your foot in the door. Then you work your way up or get the next level up job in a few years. This is the problem with a lot of guys gunning for in-house. They won't accept this. Many females absolutely will. My very first job was at the very bottom of the totem pole and I remember I made like $113k + bonus. Got a bunch of promotions up and now I'm happy. My wife did exactly the same thing - started at the bottom and promoted up. Then you get people making $300k+ in biglaw and unhappy that they are being considered for that entry level position for a huge pay cut.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598695)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:39 AM
Author: floppy lettuce

i copped a good title straight off the bat, can be done mate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598715)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:44 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

We don't even hire into good titles unless it is someone that is like a partner at a major firm and those "good titles" are still huge downgrades for them.

Different places are different, of course, because there's no consistency in-house but anyone holding out for that is going to have a tougher battle. I know if I was shooting for that I wouldn't have made it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598758)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:57 AM
Author: emerald tanning salon

5 years and 11000 billable hours later:

Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:19 AM

Author: richard clock

100 apps are rookie numbers. Keep pushing. Took me like 1000 apps but I made it. You can too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598836)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:59 AM
Author: floppy lettuce

this is true. companies are truly retarded with hiring. you can keep beating your head against the wall for years and get nowhere, but then luck into the right opportunity.

on titles, in my experience, companies approach on this varies widely. some jealously guard senior titles, others dont seem to give a shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598856)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:09 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

It becomes less retarded when you realize that they're flooded with applications at any given time.

I agree that in-house there's zero consistency. A lot of SV tech cos massively deflate titles so you'll get a generic "sr counsel" role getting $400k+ while elsewhere a VP will be getting $300k or whatever.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598902)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:55 AM
Author: emerald tanning salon

same path here, ground floor to something with an effort/reward ratio sufficient to dissuade me from moving on. got the talk early in biglaw, which may be an advantage since lifestyle creep hadnt set in and low level entry point was less of an issue both financially and from an ego perspective.

ive seen people walk directly into midlevelish roles, but they’re usually specialists and the roles often seem like a pain in the ass compared to the ones that people get promoted into, like fixing broken aspects of internal gdpr compliance vs floating up and gradually having people redirected to report to you for functions that already run themselves

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598820)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 3:34 PM
Author: Passionate Painfully Honest Library Community Account

it's much easier once you break in.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599985)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:19 AM
Author: floppy lettuce

100 apps are rookie numbers. Keep pushing. Took me like 1000 apps but I made it. You can too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598608)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:20 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

That is true.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598613)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:23 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598632)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:25 AM
Author: Slippery Zombie-like Point Regret

You can do it. I interviewed at every major company in the country. And a bunch of shithole startups too. I had 3 rounds at Theranos LJL



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598641)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:31 AM
Author: wonderful lake party of the first part

I knew a bird brain Asian woman who worked in M&A and didn't like it because it was "too hard" and she got tons of in house offers and picked the best one that suited her lifestyle.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598675)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:37 AM
Author: floppy lettuce

we all know nutella dude

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598710)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:58 AM
Author: emerald tanning salon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598842)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:00 PM
Author: wonderful lake party of the first part



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598862)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:11 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus

I applied to like 200 in house jobs, got interviewed at like 5, this was only only offer.

I remember I had to start a twitter account in order to apply for a job there. What a joke.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598910)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:19 PM
Author: wonderful lake party of the first part

I forgot you're in California where the state actively hates your people and you still vote Dem and do nothing about it ljl

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598955)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:25 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus

You must be a new poster if you don’t know about my political affiliation.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598999)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:41 PM
Author: contagious mood quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599088)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:35 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

While all good and well, California is great from an in-house jobs perspective.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599040)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:25 PM
Author: White bonkers public bath



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598998)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 10:25 AM
Author: Slimy cuckoldry principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603186)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:32 AM
Author: Fantasy-prone Twinkling Sneaky Criminal

It's rough out there lately and will soon be worse

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598685)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:32 AM
Author: appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort

I probably applied to 25 in house roles, got 4 interviews and dinged at all. Then a recruiter hit me up randomly one day and 3 months later I was starting at my first in house gig. Also a white man.

You’ll make it just keep plugging away.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:33 AM
Author: Well-lubricated indecent jew set

have you tried omitting your xo moniker from your resume?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598692)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 8:04 PM
Author: Beady-eyed hilarious senate

Not cool man. At least give the guy a fighting chance.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601162)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:41 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party

What are the odds the blue-haired trans freaks over at U.S. Soccer would be interested in a gun-owning conservative Christian white male?

https://www.linkedin.com/jobs/view/3391675429



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598734)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:44 AM
Author: floppy lettuce

you miss all the shots you dont take lad

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598753)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:45 AM
Author: Vibrant reading party



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598762)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:46 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

While it doesn't hurt to apply your chances are roughly 0.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598771)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:58 AM
Author: appetizing cream mad-dog skullcap resort

Are you putting your religion and gun ownership on resumes? I may have identified the problem

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598841)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 12:28 PM
Author: Silver Boistinker

COVID-19 Vaccination

U.S. Soccer has mandated the Covid-19 vaccine and is requiring all staff to be fully vaccinated at the start of employment

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603876)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:46 AM
Author: maniacal trump supporter weed whacker

What are the in house prospects for Asian and Jew dudes?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598764)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:03 PM
Author: emerald tanning salon

congrats, honorary white males (unless the department needs someone to handle asia)

recently watched an affable jewish guy with half decade of biglaw experience (including directly on-point in specialized industry) + half decade of inhouse experience lose out to minority female with significantly worse law school, less and worse inhouse experience, and no biglaw at all

it was justified as being out of concern that he would quickly want a bigger role and promotion. not necessarily wrong, but holy shit tough scene lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598875)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:04 PM
Author: floppy lettuce

group leaders often have specific KPIs to "increase DEI in hiring" which strongly incentivizes hiring unqualified minorities

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598885)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:11 PM
Author: emerald tanning salon

true, and the degree to which it’s true seems to scale with entity size. DEI/ESG is insidious.

the coca cola thing outside counsel thing was a funny correlate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598911)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:15 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus

Real talk, you need to network like crazy, not blind apply. I thought I had no connections either, but there’s always a friend of a friend who works at whatever company. Before you apply, ask your lawyer and non lawyer friends if they know someone who works there.

The other issue is how your resume is positioned. Gen corporate, m&a and cap markets are not marketable areas. Companies are rarely doing these trans in-house and outsource that to big lawyers (like you). They want people to do mundane day to day shit looking at consumer privacy shit and handling regulatory issues surrounding product launches etc. you need to angle yourself as having experience non-biglaw shit.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598941)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:18 PM
Author: wonderful lake party of the first part

AzNGirl who thinks you just apply for jobs and get them as a white guy

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598954)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:24 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus

Azns get no AA points in house or any other jobs, schools etc.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45598993)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 12:43 PM
Author: contagious mood quadroon

? she provided good, specific advice

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599096)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:46 PM
Author: clear trailer park mediation

"networking" and "asking friends"

let me stop you right there...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599716)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 1:29 PM
Author: Translucent shrine pisswyrm

I submitted 541 apps over 5 years, tracked in spreadsheet.

Got 2 offers, and one of those was from a gay dude (my boss) who wanted to fuck me. I had zero experience in the industry lmao. I accepted that offer.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599352)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:09 PM
Author: Galvanic selfie office

Both of his offers?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599519)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:52 PM
Author: Offensive police squad headpube



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599750)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 9:41 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601623)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 10:26 AM
Author: Slimy cuckoldry principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603193)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 18th, 2023 7:36 PM
Author: Dull doobsian volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069610)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 18th, 2023 7:38 PM
Author: anal purple affirmative action



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069622)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:17 PM
Author: Curious pink parlor keepsake machete

how many interviews?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:18 PM
Author: floppy lettuce

how was the sex

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 9:41 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601624)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:16 PM
Author: Lime Soul-stirring Theatre

What job sites do you use?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599579)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:28 PM
Author: Curious pink parlor keepsake machete

not op, but goinhouse.com is pretty good. i got lots of interviews through it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599634)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 3:13 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

I recommend LinkedIn.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599864)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:48 PM
Author: wine effete locus

(Loser)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599728)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 2:50 PM
Author: wine effete locus

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=4039326&mc=15&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45599737)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 4:04 PM
Author: Galvanic selfie office

In-housmo here, we had a pizza party AND birthday cake today.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45600140)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 7:30 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

fuck yeah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601019)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 7:46 PM
Author: misanthropic theater

Do you not have ins w/ any recruiters? I think that's the only way I've seen anyone get an in-house job. That or as part of a liked but not that much associate exit plan by the firm.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601088)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 9:38 PM
Author: contagious mood quadroon

are you willing to move, or no? it was way harder for me than switching firms, you've got to keep applying, talking to recruiters, networking, working every angle you've got.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601614)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 9:41 PM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

"working every angle you've got"

http://autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&mc=96&forum_id=2#45599594

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601628)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:09 PM
Author: Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo

Why do people want to go inhouse? It seems like castrating yourself to me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601902)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 7:12 AM
Author: contagious mood quadroon

it's a joy to have a life outside of work. i can make plans and be confident that i won't have to cancel. i sleep the same schedule, regularly. i get to spend extra time with my family. is your biglaw practice based on deals, lit, or some specialty area? i could maybe be persuaded, going back to the bigger paycheck does sound nice every once in a while

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602680)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 9:55 AM
Author: Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo

I was never biglaw. I work at a small firm.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603074)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 11:07 AM
Author: contagious mood quadroon

ah, I see -- that sounds alpha af to me. i don't litigate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603423)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 11:38 AM
Author: Fiercely-loyal concupiscible property potus

It’s life changing really. Not having to bill hours takes the anxiety to zero.

It’s not great financially for most, but you can usually make it to $300-$400k and of course there’s a bunch making $500k+ in finance/tech.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603576)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 12:13 PM
Author: Chest-beating disturbing water buffalo

Billing hours isn't bad. I just write down the time I spend doing things.

If you are saying the nice thing is that you don't do any work most of the time, then I think that is a separate perk.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 12:16 PM
Author: Vibrant reading party

Billing is a top 3 worst part of a firm job

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45603819)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2022 1:51 AM
Author: Plum self-centered chapel masturbator

Why do people want high paying jobs with reasonable hours and job stability? I guess we'll never know.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45611970)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 18th, 2023 7:44 PM
Author: internet-worthy supple faggotry

I work around 40 hours a week and make $300k-ish in flyover country. Good job security, not much pressure, not a bad gig.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2022 11:20 PM
Author: obsidian school cafeteria legend

Maybe the problems is that your personality comes through

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45601916)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 8:03 AM
Author: Diverse Field

No that’s impossible. As he mentioned he’s a tall, buff chad that HR creams over if the interact with him. Must be something else

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602771)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 8:38 AM
Author: swollen theater stage therapy

WTF recruiters call me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602855)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 8:50 AM
Author: contagious mood quadroon

to switch firms or go inhouse?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602881)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2022 12:22 AM
Author: swollen theater stage therapy

In house. Never worked a day a firm.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45611755)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 8:53 AM
Author: angry hot brunch mexican

Make your own job, brother. You don't need a work daddy to boss you around!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602889)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 8th, 2022 9:10 AM
Author: Metal national

Are you (a) insulting your wife or (b) implying that women have lower standards?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45602930)



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Date: December 9th, 2022 12:47 PM
Author: angry hot brunch mexican

First, in-house jobs are for women. Second, my wife is rich (via her alpha husband) and she doesn't need the job and doesn't have to take shit from a boss.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45609042)



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Date: December 10th, 2022 12:44 AM
Author: Disrespectful aqua crotch

(fwds poast to Paralegal Mohammad)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#45611817)



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Date: March 18th, 2023 7:37 PM
Author: spectacular cheese-eating box office dysfunction

FIRST, WHEN THERE'S NOTHING

BUT A SLOW GLOWING DREAM

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069615)



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Date: March 18th, 2023 7:38 PM
Author: spectacular cheese-eating box office dysfunction

YOU CAN DANCE RIGHT THROUGH YOUR LIFE

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5248901&forum_id=2#46069623)