Date: May 6th, 2005 6:08 PM Author: beta maize hospital
What's in the fuckin' carrier?
Huh? Oh, that's Cynthia's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. I can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture. I'm watching him while Cynthia and Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.
You brought the fuckin' Pomeranian bowling?
What do you mean brought it bowling, Dude? I didn't rent it shoes. I'm not buying it a fucking beer. He's not taking your fucking turn, Dude.
Man, if my fuckin' ex-wife asked me to take care of her fuckin' dog while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
Date: May 6th, 2005 6:15 PM Author: Blathering contagious marketing idea halford
You ready to be fucked man? I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios mio, man. Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.
Yeah, well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.
Let me tell you something, pendejo. You pull any of your crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you, stick it up your ass and pull the fucking trigger 'til it goes "click."
Date: May 6th, 2005 6:17 PM Author: Bronze Charismatic Trailer Park
What's this "day of rest" shit, man?! What is this bullshit, man? I don't fucking care! It don't matter to Jesus! But you're not fooling me! You might fool the fucks in the league office, but you don't fool Jesus! It's bush league psych-out stuff! Laughable, man! I would've fucked you in the ass Saturday, I'll fuck you in the ass next Wednesday instead! You got a date Wednesday, man!
Date: May 8th, 2005 3:26 PM Author: beta maize hospital
Dude, I finally got the venue I wanted. I'm performing my dance quintet - you know, my cycle - at Crane Jackson's Fountain Street Theatre on Tuesday night, and I'd love it if you came, and gave me notes.
Date: May 13th, 2005 4:21 PM Author: passionate crusty area
The supreme court has roundly rejected prior restraint. Lady, I got buddies who died face-down in the muck so you and I can enjoy this family restaurant
My wife's a pain in the ass. She's always busting my friggin' agates. My daughter's married to a real loser bastard. And I got a rash so bad on my ass, I can't even sit down. But you know me. I can't complain.
I--the royal "we," you know, the editorial--I dropped off the money exactly as per--look, I've got certain information, certain things have come to light, and uh, has it ever occurred to you, man, that given the nature of this new shit, that, uh, instead of running around blaming me, that this whole thing might just be, not, you know, not just such a simple, but, uh--you know?
Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe San, at Langdok, at Hill 364. These young men gave their lives. And so would Donny. Donny, who loved bowling. And so, Theodore Donald Karabozoz, in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been, we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Good night, sweet prince.
Date: October 28th, 2005 9:28 AM Author: passionate crusty area
Saturday, Donny, is shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't fucking roll!
Date: October 28th, 2005 9:33 AM Author: passionate crusty area
Oh, that's Cynthia's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. I can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture. I'm watching him while Cynthia and Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.
Date: November 1st, 2005 9:17 PM Author: passionate crusty area
Thaaat's right, Dude. The beauty of this is its simplicity. If the plan gets too complex something always goes wrong. If there's one thing I learned in Nam--