The most prestigious law school admissions discussion board in the world.
|
 |
 
|
I smear the toilet seat with my semen at house parties.
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| Metal Up-to-no-good Location Tank | 08/03/13 |
| underhanded frozen state rigpig | 08/02/13 |
| slap-happy pink hell sex offender | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| slap-happy pink hell sex offender | 08/02/13 |
| irate meetinghouse | 08/02/13 |
| Aqua theater | 08/02/13 |
| exhilarant indecent milk gas station | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| exhilarant indecent milk gas station | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| exhilarant indecent milk gas station | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| Gold telephone office | 08/02/13 |
| Avocado lodge french chef | 08/02/13 |
| drunken menage boistinker | 08/02/13 |
| Abusive bearded whorehouse | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/03/13 |
| Fragrant garnet tanning salon affirmative action | 08/02/13 |
| mauve impertinent people who are hurt | 08/02/13 |
| Yellow at-the-ready round eye newt | 08/02/13 |
| underhanded frozen state rigpig | 08/02/13 |
| bistre death wish | 08/03/13 |
| silver disturbing native | 08/04/13 |
| adventurous locale factory reset button | 05/15/18 |
| Mega Penis | 07/06/26 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: August 2nd, 2013 7:28 AM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt I hate these whores who get drunk at parties and leave with alphas they just met. They won't even look at me, me with my prestigious Juris Doctor degree, me with my stable income, me with my expensive suits, me a bona fide member of the bar, me a legend in the County Court lunchroom. No, these sluts chase firefighters and flight lieutenants, actors and athletes, cool chill bros with smooth faces and square jawlines.
But I have the toilet.
Yeah, while you're out there shaking your tits for the hunk parade, I'm parked here jerking off to the thought of you fucked. I go for slow, leisurely strokes, detailed, almost literary, scenarios. You knock. "I need to pee!" My fist goes spastic, responding. It only takes a minute or two. I'm efficient.
Door opens. Surprise, you're drunk. Don't even bother waiting for me to finish washing my hands. You just plop on the toilet, jeans down, legs splayed. I dry my hands, ever the gentleman, not even risking a sidelong glance. "Hey, why's the seat all--"
Door closes.
It only takes one. One little sperm to make its journey up your cunt canal, depositing my little protein package in your unguarded womb. Yeah, he'll get to rail you tonight, but only to spooge in a balloon (I heard the crinkle when he took his wallet out earlier). If you balloon--when you balloon--odds are it will be mine. You'll think it's his, he'll think it's his, but that nose, those eyes? They're mine.
And 23 years later, when your little bundle of joy takes his little 23andme test, the sordid truth will out. Check the scores. You: shamed slut. Him: shamed cuck. Me: laughing all the way to the sperm bank.
I don't get invited to many parties. |
 |
Date: August 3rd, 2013 1:56 PM Author: Metal Up-to-no-good Location Tank 180 azn man's tale (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23773495) |
Date: August 2nd, 2013 7:30 AM Author: underhanded frozen state rigpig yes, tomcats do this as well thru "territorial marking." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23766896) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 7:50 AM Author: slap-happy pink hell sex offender I've never heard of someone impregnating an upper thigh (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23766904) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:17 AM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt (dates fat girls) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767562) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 4:45 PM Author: slap-happy pink hell sex offender *pisses on toilet seats* (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769484) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 7:52 AM Author: irate meetinghouse is this an original work? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23766906) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 8:35 AM Author: Aqua theater it appears so although the similarities to "grateful shiteater" cannot be discarded out of hand (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23766945) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:20 AM Author: exhilarant indecent milk gas station I shared a bathroom w my sisters growing up and was terrified of accidentally doing this, but had nowhere else to fap (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767574) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:21 AM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt Was your family too poor to buy Clorox? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767582) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:22 AM Author: exhilarant indecent milk gas station I would clean the bathroom after but there was always that "what if"
plus I was like 12 |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:27 AM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt You usually orgasmed to that WHAT IF, didn't you? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767605) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:29 AM Author: exhilarant indecent milk gas station or something I watched on cinemax after I was supposed to be asleep (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767616) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 4:10 PM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt Your sisters were on Cinemax? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769338) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:24 AM Author: Gold telephone office lol at "terrified"
moar like "excited at the thought" |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 11:26 AM Author: Avocado lodge french chef this. you don't get terrified of impregnating your sister while you have her panties covering your face and you're vigorously stroking your cock. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23767598) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 4:37 PM Author: drunken menage boistinker I was particularly worried when my sisters took a bath. I totally forgot about that until this thread reminded me. I wonder how many abortions they had (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769451) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 4:29 PM Author: Abusive bearded whorehouse this thread is pretty 1029 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769427) |
|
Date: August 3rd, 2013 1:53 PM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt underrated (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23773485) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 5:10 PM Author: Fragrant garnet tanning salon affirmative action Why would you do this to your own spawn? He's basically shamed for life as a bastard child now. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769560) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 8:51 PM Author: mauve impertinent people who are hurt I will legitimate the spawn I sire with a submissive CGWBT who gives me her virginity on our wedding night. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23770704) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 5:35 PM Author: Yellow at-the-ready round eye newt The nose knows! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769659) |
|
Date: August 2nd, 2013 5:35 PM Author: underhanded frozen state rigpig i laffed, why. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23769663) |
|
Date: August 3rd, 2013 2:01 PM Author: bistre death wish An Faggot? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23773513) |
|
Date: August 4th, 2013 8:21 AM Author: silver disturbing native Fuck my ass (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#23777266) |
|
Date: May 15th, 2018 2:09 AM Author: adventurous locale factory reset button (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#36053151) |
|
Date: July 6th, 2026 8:57 PM Author: Mega Penis (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2326836&forum_id=2#49982780) |