Date: July 6th, 2010 2:42 PM Author: passionate piazza bbw
He's a banker that does a lot of traveling apparently. It was a nice restaurant and meal but he ended up paying with air mile rewards. should i be offended about this.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:47 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
Not necessarily. It's questionable, perhaps, and I'd view it a little suspect on an initial date or three, but if you've been dating a fair bit, i don't see the problem at all.
Soemtimes it's just more convenient. Such conveniences look a bit gauche on a first or second date, however.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:47 PM Author: exhilarant station
This is confusing to me. Why does it look gauche? The only thing I can think of is if you don't do your waitstaff a solid and tip in cash so that they can cheat the government. Other than that, what is the issue?
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:49 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
Social custom, perhaps. Trying to take you out cheaply looks a bit gauche on an initial date or two. I mean, if you want a cheap date, just go get coffee -- but don't take a girl to a nice place and pay with airline miles. It likely demonstrates that what you really viewed the date as "worth" is equivalent to said coffee date.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:55 PM Author: exhilarant station
*sigh*
Look. Either he pays with miles directly, or goes home and applies the miles afterward. This is money in his pocket, literally no different from the money he is paid in his paycheck, except fewer places accept miles than do dollars. Everything else is precisely the same. Money is fungible. His miles are a part of his compensation.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:01 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
please do take a poll of 100 women on first dates and ask if they would view a guy paying with airline miles as even the least bit odd. if a significant percentage do, then you understand the importance of social custom.
I am not saying she should stop dating the guy -- I am just saying that for whatever reason, on a first date or two, such actions seem a tad off.
My bf and I use coupons and rebates for dates all the fucking time, btw.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:05 PM Author: grizzly french chef
If a girl would be upset by that, it's safe to say he's better off not dating her.
In fact, it's a good idea to clear that up from the start. I think I'll start using Restaurant.com gift certificates on all first dates just to be sure.
Date: July 6th, 2010 2:45 PM Author: stirring rough-skinned chapel
yes, total deal breaker. he hits every other item on your checklist (banker, 6'2"+, went to the right school, lives in the right MANFUCKINGHATTAN neighborhood, etc.) but he PAID for your dinner with MILES.
auto-fucking-dump the cheap bastard. probably wouldn't even be willing to spend more than 20k on your engagement ring.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:34 PM Author: passionate piazza bbw
bitter much? it's not an issue of money, it's just that in certain environments it can be considered a sign of disrespect. so it's a personality thing.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:43 PM Author: passionate piazza bbw
Well lemme just guess that you're not 6'2, a banker, went to public/state schools, and don't live anywhere in manhattan. Accurate? So you can understand why I think it might be bitterness.
if the credit card earns more than 1.5% cashback, then he is cheap and does not value his date. he should pull out his debit card on dates. if he forgot his debit card, he must burn the cash back equivalent in dollars in front of her to show he values her highly
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:00 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
*rolls eyes*
*sighs*
please do take a poll of 100 women on first dates and ask if they would view a guy paying with airline miles as even the least bit odd. if a significant percentage do, then you understand the importance of social custom.
I am not saying she should stop dating the guy -- I am just saying that for whatever reason, on a first date or two, such actions seem a tad off.
My bf and I use coupons and rebates for dates all the fucking time, btw.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:03 PM Author: exhilarant station
Listen. It's not a coupon. It's not a rebate. He is not realizing ANY kind of discount on the meal. AT. ALL. DO. YOU. GET. IT. 140. IQ.
Of course it is custom to pay with a credit card or cash. Fine. It looks a little strange in the same way saying "word to your mother" might be strange after you sneeze. But the guy is not being cheap. Fool.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:08 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
The airline miles were essentially "paid" for by his employer. YES they have value, NO they are not equivalent to paying out of pocket.
Furthermore, he did this IN FRONT OF THE GIRL ON A FIRST DATE. You have to have zero understanding of women or managing early impressions to do such a thing. Go ahead --ask other women. I bet most will respond as I did -- yes, it's a bit weird, no she should not stop seeing the guy because of it. Social customs are what they are, and when we have little other info on which to gauge a guy(i.e.-as on on a first date), we fall back on such customs to guide appropriate behavior. It's why, for example, i don't care if my bf pays for dinner w coupons anymore, or why it no longer matters when he walks around in torn underwear. On fairst date, however, I don't know the guy and don't have all of the other info. necessary to gauge intentions, and so forth.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:16 PM Author: exhilarant station
Holy shit.
Listen. I get that it's weird. Okay? I get that it's weird. But it is weird by the arbitrary operation of custom only, as I mentioned in a couple of examples already - word to your mother, wampum - and not by anything else. That is fine. What this reveals, I will agree, is that the guy is insensitive to the delicate and manifold stupidities of the female mind, and hence has revealed himself, on the first date, to have the kind of autism-spectrum disregard for pointless custom that, likely, is coincident with the intelligence required for him to have gotten his job in the first place.
That said, you have argued several times in this thread that has shown himself to be cheap. No. He has not. He has not realized a single cent of savings. It is perhaps arguable, I guess, by someone more sophisticated than you, that because the universe of transactions to which he can apply miles is smaller than cash, a mile is less perfectly fungible than cash, and so it has infinitesimally smaller real value prior to the transaction. But you haven't argued that and don't even know what I'm talking about. Anyway, he has not been cheap. He has shown himself to flout convention, perhaps to his detriment.
TO RECAP:
(1) He isn't cheap, contrary to your several assertions.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:20 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
1)It was an aspie move
2)I have elite staus on two airlines and know PRECISELY what you're talking about. The more important reason why this demonstrates a lack of respect/perhaps cheapness is because the miles are simply NOT EQUIVALENT TO CASH. THEY ARE NOT EARNED MONEY. If they were, they would be immediately transferred into cash by many, if not most, frequent fliers. Even worse, if he has a job in which he earns enough miles to pay for a dinner date, he likely also earns enough money to pay for said date out of pocket. This is doubly disrespectful.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:25 PM Author: exhilarant station
This goes to fungibility, as I mentioned, and as you have shown yourself not to understand. Please explain to me the correct discount to apply to each 100 miles vis-a-vis dollars, state your assumptions, and show your work. Helpful for this would be a definition of the average consumer, an explanation of the transferability of each miles account between and among accounts, a correct assessment of the proportion of economic actors who countenance value in airline miles, and what discount (if any) they are likely to apply.
I understand that they are not exactly equivalent to cash. But as a BOTE thumbnail, their fungibility is high enough, especially in the commercial milieu of your average New York banker, to make it a push.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:30 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
That's actually quite simple: An average r/t domestic ticket is 25,000 miles; compare that against the actual cost a flier pays for a similar ticket on said airline.
As an example, a average NY-MIA r/t costs approx $250 with a week's advance purchase; compare this with the 25,000 miles. Clearly 25,000 miles are not equivalent to $25,000 dollars -- each mile, is in fact, worth 10cents.
ERGO, he got the dinner for ten cents on the Dollar. This is also why miles are not convertible into cash. HTH.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:37 PM Author: exhilarant station
Oh nevermind. You won't get this.
I agree that there are particular rules for redemptions of miles with airlines that tend to make the value of miles a bit less plastic with them than with other retailers. There are, moreover, contracts between miles providers and other retailers that can set values that are different from the value enjoyed in the wider market. (Note that pegging currency is similar though non-identical to this.) However, since you can't multiply, you can imagine my worry.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:38 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
It doesn't go the other way around: In fact, if you were to BUY miles, you'd be charged $30 - $50 per 1000 miles, depending on the airline.
DOUBLY PWNED
Also, you fail to miss how I constructed the formula and WHY it's the relevant one. The $250 x 100 = $25,000 ONLY DEMONSTRATES THAT YES, $250 = 25,000 miles. This is because 25,000/100 reduces to 250/1 or a 250:1 ratio, genius.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:43 PM Author: exhilarant station
LOL. I will leave you to work on your math, first of all. I happily concede, though, that airlines have rules governing redemption and purchase of miles.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:44 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
Also, you fail to miss how I constructed the formula and WHY it's the relevant one. The $250 x 100 = $25,000 ONLY DEMONSTRATES THAT YES, $250 = 25,000 miles. This is because 25,000/100 reduces to 250/1 or a 250:1 ratio, genius.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:47 PM Author: exhilarant station
... A 250:1 ratio of what?
Listen. Let me make this simple:
Traveler wants to buy a plane ticket! His airline says: "Well, you can pay us $250, or you can pay us with 25,000 frequent flier miles." Traveler says, "Why do you give me the option?" Airline says, "We consider them to be equivalent." Traveler says, "$250 is equivalent to FF25000?" Airline says, "You got it!"
Date: July 6th, 2010 6:10 PM Author: exhilarant station
lolol I'm so glad that I was a part of this thread. I mean, I know that this kind of stuff can be hard. It's easy to move a decimal point, etc. People shouldn't be mocked that hard for it. But never in my life have I seen such steadfast commitment to such an easy error that has been explained many times. She must just be really upset.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:45 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
Also, you fail to miss how I constructed the formula and WHY it's the relevant one. The $250 x 100 = $25,000 ONLY DEMONSTRATES THAT YES, $250 = 25,000 miles. This is because 25,000/100 reduces to 250/1 or a 250:1 ratio, genius.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:30 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
That's actually quite simple: An average r/t domestic ticket is 25,000 miles; compare that against the actual cost a flier pays for a similar ticket on said airline.
As an example, a average NY-MIA r/t costs approx $250 with a week's advance purchase; compare this with the 25,000 miles. Clearly 25,000 miles are not equivalent to $25,000 dollars -- each mile, is in fact, worth 10cents.
ERGO, he got the dinner for ten cents on the Dollar. This is also why miles are not convertible into cash. HTH.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:05 PM Author: exhilarant station
No, it is not. And it's fine if it's weird to use this particular currency. I'm sure he would get a strange look if he paid in wampum too. That said, it is a currency like any other.
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:49 PM Author: Twisted Resort Headpube
haha yea wtf is next a fucking signed piece of paper that stands in for cash? what a faggot, I suggest you remain alone because you'll find mr right in no time
Date: July 6th, 2010 4:53 PM Author: Chocolate weed whacker
would it be insulting to a woman for a man to take the woman to a restaurant where the man is main homies w/the restaurant owner and gets a free meal? assume he leaves very respectable/generous tip.
what if he takes you to a place where he is despised so much that they won't ban him but they do charge him double. he never tells you why they hate him so much
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:00 PM Author: Snowy yarmulke
I would ATD (or just dump) any fucking worthless piece of shit cunt if she even cared about this for one second. Even if she was a 10 with Grade A dick sucking lips.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:03 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
It's not the *value* that precisely matters. It's the impression it creates on an early date-- early dates, after all, are largely about managing initial impressions.
That said, she should NOT ding the guy. However, I promise you a plurality of women would find this at least a tad odd.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:05 PM Author: Disturbing wrinkle
I agree that the action of using miles was a tad odd but at times above you seem to be arguing that there's a meaningful difference between miles and cash and I disagree with that.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:13 PM Author: heady spot tank
are the miles like a coupon or like a credit card?
if they are like a credit card, then the fucking girl should mind her own fucking business and shouldn't even know how he pays, unless she is going to pay for it her fucking self.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:16 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
HE did this IN FRONT OF THE GIRL ON A FIRST DATE. You have to have zero understanding of women or managing early impressions to do such a thing. Go ahead --ask other women. I bet most will respond as I did -- yes, it's a bit weird, no she should not stop seeing the guy because of it. Social customs are what they are, and when we have little other info on which to gauge a guy(i.e.-as on on a first date), we fall back on such customs to guide appropriate behavior. It's why, for example, i don't care if my bf pays for dinner w coupons anymore, or why it no longer matters when he walks around in torn underwear. On fairst date, however, I don't know the guy and don't have all of the other info. necessary to gauge intentions, and so forth.
Date: June 6th, 2011 6:29 PM Author: Sepia soggy pit
money is fungible. he's still giving up cash in order to buy dinner.
most rewards programs that i'm aware of give the greatest discount (or, the most dollars per point/mile) if used towards hotels and flights. if he used it for dinner, it's quite likely that it actually cost him more than it would to buy a flight or hotel room (a $200 meal likely would have cost more in points than a $200 flight/hotel). it's very possible that the meal was more expensive if paid for in points that if paid for in dollars if you account for opportunity cost.
it's sort of aspie i guess but i don't see why it would be a dealbreaker.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:20 PM Author: Swashbuckling Emerald Chad Telephone
It's not just perfect because every guy bit on it, but because every girl agreed with OP. Truly mind boggling that xo girls would be offended that someone uses money that would otherwise expire over "real" money, but not at all surprising.
She's probably right in that it shows bad manners. I don't know if it's necessarily disrespectful because I don't think men view it that way and you have to look at it from the male's point of view.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:32 PM Author: Disturbing wrinkle
And miles can probably be redeemed in countries where the currency has appreciated against the dollar since the miles were earned. So in that sense, the miles might be worth more than US dollars. Holy shit! He's a keeper!
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:34 PM Author: onyx fragrant death wish selfie
Read what I wrote in response to ak below -- furthermore, airline tickets are4 not priced on a PPP basis or a f/x differential -- you don't travel more cheaply from Bolivia to Miami, just because you buy the ticket in the local Bolivian currency.
That's actually quite simple: An average r/t domestic ticket is 25,000 miles; compare that against the actual cost a flier pays for a similar ticket on said airline.
As an example, a average NY-MIA r/t costs approx $250 with a week's advance purchase; compare this with the 25,000 miles. Clearly 25,000 miles are not equivalent to $25,000 dollars -- each mile, is in fact, worth 10cents.
ERGO, he got the dinner for ten cents on the Dollar. This is also why miles are not convertible into cash. HTH.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:37 PM Author: multi-colored mint cuckoldry casino
lulz. this is funny.
i actually would be impressed by this behavior as it indicates he is likely saavy about things like frequent flyer, rewards and cash back programs and spends a lot of $$$.
Date: July 6th, 2010 6:00 PM Author: multi-colored mint cuckoldry casino
no, what i mean is someone who spends a lot of $$$ usually get a lot more perks/rewardsc/cashback type things that i ultimately benefit from if i date them, so it's a good thing if they share it w/ me.
Date: July 6th, 2010 5:40 PM Author: poppy main people
I'm actually surprised at the women who care
I wouldn't care.
The meal is worth X amount of money regardless of how he got it. His company paid him in both salary and in perks. I really don't see the difference if he got this particular perk from company paid trips or actual cash.
One of my guy friends and his wife went out with a colleague to a baseball game. The colleague had the tickets, and my friend paid for dinner afterwards. Then later when my friend found out the colleague got the tickets through work, he was pissed.
WTF. Baseball tickets are worth something regardless of how you got them. That guy could have chosen to sell those tickets. It's still money he chose to spend on my friend.
Date: July 6th, 2010 6:31 PM Author: Unholy Preventive Strike
xo works when I'm at work and want to yell as some faggot who isn't likely autistic just a faggot. I often do it when I'm studying as well during the school year.
Date: July 6th, 2010 10:27 PM Author: lurid anal narrative
i, for one, thought it was an excellent tactic in managing initial impressions! short of whipping out his chewed-up passport, all stamped except for half of the last page (that's a shout-out to OTR. pretty sure i saw her dating profile once; said something about "i have a brain and a passport -- and i use both." if not, well, it's something she would have written)
Date: July 6th, 2010 11:31 PM Author: nighttime sable gaping hall
The thing with the gift certificate is that restaurants that tend to give away gift certificates might not be appropriate for first dates. It might look gauche to whip out the gift certificate and it shows that he picked the restaurant with cost savings in mind and might not have considered other factors, such as convenience of location or whether I would like the food.
Other than that, it really doesn't matter how he pays for the meal. Also if I know he's paying with gift certificate or miles that means there's more money to spend on nicer meals or wine.
Date: July 7th, 2010 11:57 AM Author: lurid anal narrative
story has a twist: the girl was Rowan, who dinged the guy for not conforming to a rigid list of standard behaviors. while somewhat forgiving on age, looks and income, Rowan is actually a hyperscrutinizer for any aspie behavior, since she is a nerd herself